


Do not go gentle into that good night

by Khrat9



Series: In Every Life, In Every Other World [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arranged Marriage, Conspiracy, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Kara Danvers/Jimmy Olsen, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-02-18
Packaged: 2018-09-19 11:38:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 63,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9438548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khrat9/pseuds/Khrat9
Summary: Isn’t it weird, Lena thinks bitterly, how the odds keep on stacking against her?She never asked to be a Luthor. She isn’t even a real one in the first place. And yet, here she is, dragged by the arms through cold, silent corridors, surrounded by a dozen guards in their polished armor. She is bound, bruised and dirty, escorted to be judged for crimes her brother committed. Lena chuckles derisively. Not Luthor enough in her family’s eyes but enough to be punished in their stead by everyone else.Medieval AU





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!  
> English is not my first language and all mistakes are my own. I'm currently learning the vocabulary for Medieval time, so it might feel a bit stiff from time to time. I used characters I already used in my previous story but no need to read it to understand the character. I will add tags and characters as the story progresses.  
> A special thank you to Krystalgoderitch who boosted me back up when I was feeling down. Thank you.
> 
> Hope you'll all like it. Enjoy!

 

 

 _Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, Rage against the dying of the light_. **Dylan Thomas**

 

 

 

Isn’t it weird, Lena thinks bitterly, how the odds keep on stacking against her?

 

She never asked to be a Luthor. She isn’t even a real one in the first place. And yet, here she is, dragged by the arms through cold, silent corridors, surrounded by a dozen guards in their polished armor. She is bound, bruised and dirty, escorted to be judged for crimes her brother committed. Lena chuckles derisively. Not Luthor enough in her family’s eyes but enough to be punished in their stead by everyone else.

 

Lena knows this is likely to be the end for her. The war the Luthor had waged for more than a decade against Krypton would surely guarantee her a swift execution or a lifelong imprisonment. She didn’t know which one was worse or rather, which one she would prefer. A tug against her arms makes her pay attention to her surroundings. They are going down spiraling staircases. To Lena’s surprise, the guards don’t seem fazed by the tight fit, if anything it looks like they go even faster. Lena stumbles on one of the steps to buy herself some time but the guards holding her arms straighten her up before she can fall and nearly lift her off the steps for the rest of the way. She can’t escape.

 

They round a corner and she is suddenly basked in sunlight. She blinks rapidly, cringing at the sudden assault. It felt like months since she saw the light of day. She lost track of time in the first week. Lena can’t remember how long she has been held captive in that dark and cold dungeon. She welcomes the first breeze coming through the arcading caressing her face. The fresh air was a relief for her nose now accustomed to the dank smell of dirt and of her own sweat. What a sight she must be, Lena muses looking at her torn and dirty clothes, her hair in disarray, greasy and layers of dirt on her skin. Her mother would be ashamed, well, more than she already is.

 

She feels the weight of their stare like pinpricks at the back of her neck. Servants and maids suddenly stopping in their activities, pressed against the wall to let her cortege pass, gawking at her disgusted and revolted at her mere presence. Lena didn’t ask for this. She had just wanted to leave far away. She had tried to flee to the Outlawed Territories to make a name for herself outside of her family. Lena sighs feeling her bottom lip tremble against her will. She just wanted to be free.

 

She bites her lips hard enough for the tremble to cease. She bites it hard enough for the sadness to be replaced by anger. An all-consuming anger that burn her inside, fueled by fear and resentment, and awakening something far worse, far more destructive than any blade in the Five Kingdoms. Lena feels the Luthor’s pride shine bright in her eyes as she stares down every person foolish enough to make eye contact with her. She grits her teeth in silent fury and watch with satisfaction as they look away one by one. She might not be a real Luthor but she knows damn well how to play one and she’ll be damned if she doesn’t scorched a few on her way down to hell.

 

Her impressive cortege comes to a halt. They stand solemnly, absolutely still in front of two massive wooden doors, the El’s family crest carved into each one in silver and gold. Lena gulps nervously at the flow of chatter she hears coming through the doors. She knows what is waiting for her inside this room. She can already imagine the hunger in their eyes at the sight of her blood. All waiting in line only to have a piece of her flesh. One guard goes to the doors and knocks loudly three times before they open slowly before them.

 

The chatter ceases and Lena feels like her heart is going to beat out of her chest. She feels like the deafening sound of her heartbeat is trying to compensate for the sudden silence. She takes in a breath, trying to steel herself against the embodiment of steel itself waiting at the other end of the room. As one, her guards resume their walk, guiding her through the Great Hall.

 

The whole Kryptonian court stares at her on each side much like the servants she passed on her way here. Lena can’t stare them all down this time, instead she gazes straight ahead, head held high as she meets the Queen’s eyes dead on.

 

Lena doesn’t know a lot about Kryptonians. They used to be reclusive people, keeping to themselves deep inside their dry territory. No one in her kingdom actually saw one before the war. Krypton was then a land of mystery and its people were made of legends and cautionary tales to scare children from straying too far from their homes. She remembers hearing as a child that Kryptonians could fly, leaping into the sky at night to take away those who lingers outside, past bedtime. She remembers stories about their glowing red eyes flashing into the night, deep into the forest daring anyone to cross the border and enter their territory. She remembers Lex being fascinated by those stories.

 

Meeting them in real life was nothing short of disappointing. They weren’t what the legends made them to be. They weren’t mystical creatures. They looked quite ordinary even. She was only sixteen when she attended her first battle; the first time she saw them. Men and women strapped in bulky, shiny armors with their swords and shields at the ready. Thousands of soldiers standing in military standard formation on dry sand, waiting for them to cross the border, for them to attack first. She remembers her father laughing at their cowardice as he signaled the archers to begin the attack. It had been the first time Lena had drawn an arrow in battle. It had been the first time she did it with the intent to kill someone.

 

She had watched the volley of arrows whistle past her ears as it flew into the sky directly into the heart of the Kryptonians’ formation. Nothing happened. Her father ordered a second wave and Lena and the hundreds of archers at her back drew another arrow and let it fly into the sky, their aim still true and deadly.

 

King Lionel Luthor’s horse had whined nervously, his leg kicking the dirt in agitation. Lena still remembers the unease she felt then at the absolute silence following the first strike. The Kryptonians had been eerily still, not even fazed by the hundreds of arrows that had just fallen upon them. She remembers thinking that there might have been some truth in the legends after all.

 

That day had been an absolute bloodbath for King Luthor’s army. As soon as his army had crossed the border the Kryptonians had attacked fiercely, killing everyone that still stood in their land. The dry sand had gorged on the blood of her fellow comrades as they fell one by one against an army that couldn’t be armed by the steel of their swords. Her father died that day. Lex had sounded the horn and had ordered a retreat. The wet red sand became a reminder of what they had lost.

 

Lex, the Chief Engineer of the Royal Army, became King. It marked the beginning of ten long years of hatred and war. Krypton slowly came out of the shadows and became more violent each year. It had been an escalation in violence that had consumed her brother entirely. He became obsessed with Kryptonians. He had worked relentlessly to understand what made them invincible, bleeding the kingdom dry in the process. Until he finally found their weakness.

 

The King consort stares her down with barely disguised hatred and contempt. A sneer easily seen on his features as the guards bring her closer to the throne. Lena keeps her eyes on the Queen, regal and poised on the throne, the uniform of Commander in chief barely hidden under her deep red cloak. The Queen has the same calculating look as her mother. A cold logic and ruthlessness that testified of her willingness to do everything that needed to be done.

 

The guards stops a few meters before the Queen and suddenly kneel, the two guards holding her by the arms bring her down with them.

 

“General Astra.” Lena watches them proclaim loudly in greetings, heads down. Lena frowns puzzled, apparently even their hierarchy was different from hers.

 

The General stands slowly and steps down the few steps separating them. She dismisses the guards with a wave of her hand and suddenly Lena is left alone, still on her knees before this woman who is appraising her coldly.

 

Lena rages inside at being so defenseless. She is the best archers in her kingdom, princess by name and here she is thrown to the ground like she is nothing, worthless. Lena grits her teeth and begins to stand, hands on her knees to brace herself. Her legs wobble now that she has no one to lift her own body for her.

 

The woman watches her amused and it infuriates her even more. Lena hears a guard move behind her before the General raises her hand to stop him. Now at her full height, Lena stares back as fiercely as she can. The General sniggers and turns her back on her, not intimidated in the least. Lena swallows her nerves and waits. General Astra sits back on her throne and it’s like the Great Hall take a collective breath.

 

“Lena Luthor.” General Astra’s voice booms in the room airily, cutting through the silence. She looks bored as if she wasn’t holding her fate between her hands right at this moment.

 

Lena raises an eyebrow in challenge. She is defeated, surrounded but she still wouldn’t go down without a fight. As small as the fight was.

 

“This is your trial,” she continues with the same nonchalant tone. Lena scoffs, she wasn’t here on a trial. She knows that in those people eyes, she was already guilty.

 

“As per Krypton’s law, I will allow you to have a defendant even though you are not Kryptonian. Please state this person name now before we begin…” General Astra smiles obligingly, waiting, making a show of sweeping the room with her eyes before looking back to her. “No?” Lena feels her insides boil with rage.

 

“Very well.” General Astra looks toward the bloodthirsty crowd behind her. “Dear honorable Kryptonians. We are gathered here to determine the responsibility of Lena Luthor, here before you, in several crimes committed in Krypton prior to her capture last month. I, General Astra, will preside this trial.” General Astra focuses her intransigent gaze back to her. “Lena Luthor did you or did you not trespass into Kryptonian’s territory armed with weaponized kryptonite?”

 

It had been Lex’s great discovery, green glowing rocks that proved to weaken Kryptonians. Lex had fused it into the steel of their weapons and now, they could actually kill them. After so many years, Lex’s work paid off. It had been their only defense for years. It kept the war at a standstill, reducing it at skirmish along the border. Lena keeps her head high. “I did.”

 

General Astra nods and continues with suddenly more fire. “Did you or did you not assault with the intent to kill four guards of the border patrol on your way into this territory?”

 

“They attacked me first and I didn’t kill them. Just unconscious,” Lena blurts out, the bruises on her ribs still fresh in her mind; General Astra waits, her cold gaze freezing her to the bones. Lena scoffs; they weren’t here to determine her innocence but to prove that she is guilty. “I did.”

 

General Astra nods solemnly; Lena hears the beginning of grumbling at her back as the General continues, her face this time is distorted by a barely controlled rage and hatred. “Did you or did you not ordered the attacks of three Kryptonian’s villages….”

 

Lena stares frozen, “What? Wait…” She tries but her protest is swallowed by the rumbling crowd behind her.

 

“Liar!” she hears someone yell.

 

General Astra raises a hand to silence the crowd. “…Resulting in the death of innocent children, honest women and men…”

 

“I didn’t.” Lena bellows vehemently. She takes a step toward the General but is immediately stopped by two guards gripping her shoulders. Lena struggles against them; she won’t let them accuse her of mass murder. “I didn’t! It’s not me! You have the wrong person!”

 

The crowd behind becomes even more agitated, she hears someone shout, “She is a Luthor, she must pay!”

 

“…a week before your arrest.” The General finishes, she stands at her full height, the man next to her does too and extend a hand toward a nobleman who walks toward Lena and stops just before her with an open letter carefully deposited in a case protected by glass.

 

Lena stops struggling and looks incredulously at the letter presented to her.

 

“Is this not your seal, Captain Lena Luthor of the Luthor’s Royal Archers?”

 

Lena keeps staring, dumbfounded at the irrefutable proof presented to her. A letter that shows she ordered a massacre she never approved of. It was her writing, it was the paper she used only for her correspondence with her Lieutenant, and it was signed with the seal she always kept with her but had destroyed just before she left for the Outlawed Territories. Lena keeps staring, dismayed at what she sees in front of her.

 

The crowd screams what must be profanities at her but everything feels muted, far away; Lena knows she is in shock. She was being framed by her own people.

 

She hears someone being brought in at the back of the throne room, struggling against their guards and hers diligently turns her toward the commotion. General Astra stands next to her and murmurs quietly over the babbling crowd, “Isn’t he your Lieutenant, Captain? We found him fleeing the scene of the third massacre and captured him with your letter just before he could retreat behind your kryptonite mined border.”

 

Lena knows the General is watching her. She knows she is being scrutinized and every micro expression of hers is being filed into the General’s head. She looks into Luke’s eyes who widens at her sight and she knows; she knows that it’s not him. Luke was being framed too.

 

General Astra suddenly blocks the view of her Lieutenant, gagged and brought down to his knees, her attention focused back on her and whispers, “It’s not you, is it?”

 

Lena looks into her eyes and shakes her head. “You have the wrong person,” she repeats softly. Lena ponders if she should tell the General why she was in Krypton in the first place; the reason why she risked everything to reach the Outlawed Territories.

 

The crowd bellows behind them and Lena reads into her eyes that it wouldn’t matter. The crowd wanted their blood and couldn’t be reasoned with, not anymore. General Astra nods and smiles sadly; the only apology a leader could give. Lena is a casualty of war. She is so used to lead the charge and her archers to be the first one to strike in battle that it feels suddenly funny to stand on the other end, struck in the back by one of her arrow.

 

General Astra faces the crowd and raises a hand asking for their attention. The silence is deafening. “After close examination of the evidence presented to us, I declare Lena Luthor to be guilty of all charges brought against her.”

 

Lena hears Luke, still gagged and restrained, scream and trash against his guards. A few of her initial cortege goes to help the others restrain him.

 

“Lena Luthor is sentence to death, along with her Lieutenant Luke Perec, tomorrow at noon.” General Astra looks at her one last time before going back to sit on the throne.

 

A huge cheer resonates in the Great Hall. She watches Luke gets dragged back out of the throne room. She feels her own guards guide her away by the arms as they surround her like when they first brought her in. But instead of making sure she doesn’t escape, they are now trying to protect her from the prying hands of the crowd as they carve a way out of the Great Hall. Lena walks head held high, looking straight ahead as people screams profanities at her.

 

 

Lena never thought about death before unless it was to find a way to give it as quickly and painlessly as possible. She never thought she would have to face it one day. Not that it never occurred to her that she might die; she had been living in wartime for most of her life after all. But she never thought death would come to her like this. Her last moments spent in a dungeon that smelt of molds and body fluids; far away from her people and betrayed by one of them.

 

Lena sighs, wishing she could feel the breeze on her face or see the stars one last time. Luke was somewhere here in the tower with her, hands and ankles chained to the wall, cold and alone, plunged into the dark like her. They form quite the pair. Partners at their first archery competition when they were both eight years old, both entering the army at fifteen, the first and only person she picked as her Lieutenant when she became Captain at twenty-two. And now at twenty-seven… Lena feels a few tears slide down her cheeks.

 

She doesn’t even have the time to dry her tears that she hears outside her door a thundering sound: footsteps. And then, a body fall heavily against her door. Lena stands up quickly, her shackles rattling in the sudden oppressing silence. She hears the jingling of keys as someone takes it from the guard’s belt and slots it into the lock. Lena presses herself against the wall, giving herself as much momentum as the chain would allow her, ready to pound on her attacker if needs be. The door of her cell opens. A hooded person enters, tall, a cape concealing everything else from Lena’s eyes. They show their hands in a non-threatening manner.

 

“I won’t hurt you,” says the voice. A woman if Lena hears correctly.

 

“Who are you?” She asks still ready to swing her shackled hands into that person’s face.

 

The woman steps toward her slowly. “You need to come with me. We don’t have much time.”

 

“Why?”

 

The person huffs and looks behind her quickly. “Look, we really don’t have much time and I’d rather we be out of here before the rotations comes. So, I’m going to come near you and I’m going to take those shackles off, alright?”

 

Lena nods, still wary.

 

“Please don’t hit me.” The person murmurs before going down on her knees and unlocking the bounds on her ankles and then her wrists. The woman steps away, hands in evidence.

 

Lena breathes a bit easier as she rubs her wrists. “Thank you.”

 

The person nods and if it wasn’t this dark Lena might have been able to see her smile.

 

“We have to go. Now,” she says going back to the door, watching carefully into the corridor.

 

Lena follows her quietly. “There’s someone else with me. We have to get him back.”

 

“Luke Perec, isn’t it? Don’t worry, I already have people get him out. He’s on the opposite side of the castle with a lot less guards than you.”

 

Before the person could fly out the cell, Lena grabs her hand, stopping her for a moment. The woman looks back at her, her face still obscured by her hood. “How can I know you are telling me the truth?”

 

The woman shrugs. “I guess, you’ll just have to trust me.” She squeezes her hand and goes into the corridor, motioning Lena to follow after checking the turns at the corridor.

 

Lena exhales quickly and disregard, just for the time being, her instinct telling her that it’s a trap. She’ll ignore it until they are out of here and then, she’ll shake away that person too. Lena quickly joins her new ally. A few strands of hair fall out of her hood as the woman turns her head toward her and grips Lena’s hand before making her way further and further away from Lena’s cell. She’s blonde, Lena remarks distractedly. The woman seems to know her way around the castle, she walks fast without hesitation into many twists and turns, never letting go of the hand she had gripped earlier.

 

As they go down the spiraling staircases, Lena had used earlier with her guards; she tries to keep her ears out for any sound that might alert her of guards nearby. But she doesn’t hear anything, no signs of life in the tower, only the sound of her blood pounding in her ears. She doesn’t know if it’s a testimony of the Kryptonian’s arrogance or a side effect from her month long isolation with her thoughts for only company. Lena knows it’s a tactic commonly used to break an enemy. And she is reluctant to admit that it does work. She feels like her breathing is too loud or that the sound of her heart will echo onto the stone wall and alert any guards in the vicinity. The bright lit torches make her surrounding fuzzy, creating shadows on the wall, ready to pounce on her.

 

Suddenly something tug on her hand harder and push her against a wall, into an alcove, a body draped against her own. Lena first reaction is to push the person away; she thrashes against the warm body before a hand grabs her jaw and forces her to meet their eyes.

 

“Breathe,” the blue eyes says.

 

Lena obeys and it’s like a fog had lifted itself away from her mind. She feels the cold on her skin, the wind traveling more easily through the castle. They are at ground level, Lena realizes suddenly. She hears the thundering footsteps of guards passing through another corridor near them and the intense blue eyes, still fixed on her, asking her to breathe.

 

Lena nods slowly and calms herself down, feeling the woman release the gentle grip on her jaw and smile softly, relieved.

 

The warning bells suddenly ring throughout the castle.

 

“Shit!” The woman steps away from her and looks carefully outside the alcove.

 

“What do we do?” Lena whispers and grips her hand tightly, her front pressing softly against the woman’s back to have her own view on their surroundings.

 

“Wait; let me think…” she whispers over her shoulders, looking a bit surprised to find Lena so close. “We only have five minutes before the guards flood the ground and block all exits; five more before they begin to search the whole place.” She pauses and Lena sees a plan forming quickly in her blue eyes. “We’ll have to go to the upper levels,” Lena raises an eyebrow perplexed. “… just trust me on this.”

 

Lena sighs; she didn’t have much of a choice anyway. “Alright, lead the way.”

 

True to her words, countless of guards appear out of nowhere, running toward different parts of the castle. They use the confusion and the haste to their advantage to flee toward a stairwell that leads to a quiet wing, dark and dusty. Far away from what used to be its initial state.

 

They sneak into a room and Lena feels her heartbeat finally settle down. The familiar adrenaline of impending danger flowing back easily into her veins. “What now?” She asks watching the woman open a big window and look outside. Lena joins her and sees the moat just below. A high drop into dark water. Lena chokes looking back incredulously at the smiling woman.

 

“What? Afraid of heights?” She asks teasingly.

 

For a matter of fact yes, Lena is. But she won’t admit it, infuriated by the absolute confidence radiating from her. She watches her take her cloak away, finally revealing herself. Lena is stun by the beauty before her. She had been with a fair share of women but no one compared to the way the moon highlights this woman’s cheekbones and her slender nose; how it paints her body with shadows and lights, giving her an intriguing sense of mystery and confidence only depicted in legends.

 

The woman folds her cloak into a bag Lena doesn’t remember seeing, and straps it to her back.

 

“Sorry. But we really do have to jump, it is the only way.”

 

Lena gulps but for an entirely different reason. They hear footsteps somewhere outside the door and Lena knows she’ll have to jump, quickly. She feels a warm hand slide into her own, her savior standing next to her, smiling reassuringly.

 

“It’s okay, we’ll do it together.”

 

Guards are opening doors, one by one on their wing, approaching slowly to their location. Lena nods, taking a deep breath, before they jump from the windowsill into the dark night.

 

For a few infinite seconds, Lena feels like she is flying.

 

 

 


	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> Sorry it took so long. It was a hard one to write. I wasn't sure where I was going with this story for awhile. Thank you for the Kudos and reviews!!! It definitely motivated me to write more. Thanks.  
> I hope you'll enjoy it. :)

 

 

 

Lena doesn’t need anyone.

 

At least that’s what she tells herself as she follows diligently the person who most certainly saved her life through a maze of rocks, small ravines, and tall grass. Lena only complied because they had to be quick and use the darkness to put as much distance as possible between them and their pursuers. Beside, the mysterious woman promised to take her to Luke, so as soon as she gets her Lieutenant back, Lena has every intention to ditch her and use - if need be - the razor sharp rock she hid in the fold of the scarf her savior gently lend to her.

 

Lena didn’t stay alive all this years by giving her trust that easily to those asking her to. Not anymore. It was tiring, she admits, to always have to look over her shoulder and never really feel at ease, anywhere. Be it her mother’s back-stabbing jibes at the castle, her enemies on the battlefield, and now even her own people for whom she did everything to protect.

 

Lex’s name echoes into her mind but Lena shakes it away. She can’t throw accusations without knowing all the facts, without having proofs that her brother did indeed betray her. He didn’t approve of her trying to forms alliance with the neighboring kingdoms. The tentative Trade Treaty she had tried to sign with Daxam two years ago crumbled really fast when Krypton had threatened to change the course of Daxam’s main river, which run through the north part of Krypton before alimenting Daxam’s wheat fields, in retaliation.

 

Lex didn’t like to lose and even less to be made a fool in front of his enemies and the Luthor’s court. But Lena had to try, if only for their people to be able to rely on something more than the tempestuous sea to find their food. And with more and more people forced to join the army, there wasn’t enough workforce to feed the whole kingdom.

 

Lena’s knees buckle suddenly. She can’t remember when she last ate. Or if she can even qualify the hard bread and the smelly, watery soup they had been feeding her for the last month as food. The burst of adrenaline she got from her escape is rapidly dwindling away and Lena rages. She rages inside at her body’s weakness, at the cold, and the dampness of her clothes that makes her teeth rattle.

 

A hand, kind and warm, settles tentatively on her shoulder and Lena shrugs it away, petulantly.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Lena breathes deeply and stands back up, shaking the dizziness away. “I’m not weak,” she replies vehemently.

 

“I didn’t say you were,” the woman pauses and extends her hand toward Lena. “Needing help from time to time doesn’t mean you are weak.”

 

Lena hums, unconvinced.

 

“Come on,” she wiggles her fingers looking at her expectantly. “We're almost there.”

 

Lena sighs, wondering why does she have to be so nice and helpful and noble? Lena nods her consent and she is suddenly pressed against the blonde’s side, one arm thrown over the Lady’s shoulder. After a few adjustments, they slowly resume their walk. Lena leans more heavily than she likes against the strong, wiry frame, burrowing herself into the thickness of the cloak.

 

They have been walking for awhile, both quiet, and Lena tries to guess as much as possible about the stranger as she can. She could ask her, of course. She could be pointblank and demand to know who she was. But Lena doesn’t want to tip her hand that soon into the game. Instead, she files in her mind all the minus details she can see, hopping they will give her some insight into this woman’s identity. Like the way she holds herself with her shoulders stretch back, her chin up... Something about her exudes more than a sense of nobility, it commands respect. It is something Lena often sees in court. The belief to be of importance. True or not, all that matters is the way someone can exude power only in the way they hold themselves. And this woman exudes a lot of that. Everything in her speaks of confidence. The way she talks and walks with assurance, light and determined like she did in the castle.

 

And the way she had run across the castle, knowing when to turn, where to hide, which room to go in a matter of a few seconds cemented in Lena’s mind that her savior might be Kryptonian. But it didn’t make sense. Just a few hours ago, Lena witnessed the whole Kryptonian court cheer when she was sentenced to death. Why would this one save her? More importantly, Lena couldn’t help but wonder what would she have to give this stranger for saving her life?

 

Lena hates this. It’s like playing chess blindfolded. She doesn’t know what to expect or how to plan her next move because for the life of her, Lena can’t guess the reason why the woman decided to save her from a certain death. Lena knows she is now indebted to her. She can try to escape, to fool her and disappear but Lena knows she will always have this debt hanging over her head. Lena hates to admit it, but she is now bound to this woman she knows next to nothing of, and it scares the hell out of her.

 

If only she had her bow with her, she thinks bitterly, walking alongside the cryptic woman. It was her dad’s last gift to her, just before they went to battle. A majestic longbow she had worked so hard to tame. Hours upon hours of training, bloody fingers, and tensed muscles. The smooth wood glued to her skin and becoming an extension of her arm. It was both a weapon and armor. The one thing she could hide behind without anyone complaining. She got so good at it no one dared to. And now that she is without it, kept somewhere in the Kryptonian castle - Lena feels utterly defenseless.

 

But just in case her hunch might be wrong about the woman being Kryptonian, Lena checks again if she still has the jagged rock she picked up earlier in the fold of her scarf. It was a slight comfort, just the knowledge that she could still defend herself if need be. Of course, Lena knows that if this woman is Kryptonian, the rock would be useless, no matter how sharp it was.

 

Lena is tired. She knows she won’t last long tonight. The constant vigilance is taking a toll on her nerves and mental endurance. So she wills herself to trust, just for a few minutes, that the woman guiding her won’t let her walk into a tree or a hole, at least long enough to have a bit of shut eye. An archer knows when to wait and when to strike.

 

As soon as her body goes a bit more lax, Lena feels the Lady shoulder a bit more of her weight, a hand holding onto her waist a bit more tightly. Lena sighs, allowing her mind to rest as she breathes into the overwhelming sense of safety the woman radiates.

 

There is an odd atmosphere surrounding those who walk at night, alone, with uncertainty lodged deep into their heart. Lena can’t help but remember those fairytales Lex used to tell her deep into the night when she couldn’t find sleep. The both of them buried under a fort of blankets with only the moon to keep away the dark. Stories of a young boy who lost his way and went deep into the forest. Only to stumble into a magical land where everything was possible. Not unlike the young boy, Lena feels like she is on the verge of discovery. This feeling of being thrown into a path she didn’t chose but was always meant to be on. Something that will forever change her life.

 

A voice booms suddenly into the dark. “Girl of Steel, you are late!” Lena jerks awake confused and disoriented, the brightness of a fire blinding her for a few seconds.

 

The woman holding her shrugs. “Sorry, I had to improvise halfway into our escape.”

 

Lena waits for her eyes to adjust and focuses on the three silhouettes sitting near the fire, one sitting farther away against a tree. Two women stand up as they approach and Lena tenses when she recognizes Luke attached against the tree. Her Lieutenant perks up as soon as he recognizes her. “Lena, run!” He screams before being promptly knocked unconscious.

 

Lena bristles and feels her instinct kick off. In a matter of seconds, she has the blonde into a chokehold, gripping the thin jagged rock she hid in the fold of her scarf like a dagger against her throat.

 

The fire crackles into the dark night, an unwilling witness in the middle of a standoff.

 

“Don’t do this.” Lena hears her captive say, calm and confident, just loud enough for her to hear as everything stop to a halt.

 

Lena dismisses her and looks toward the two women behind the fire. “Untie my Lieutenant or she dies.” She threatens, pressing the jagged rock closely to the blonde’s jugular.

 

“Come on, Princess…” A brunette scoffs, spitting Lena’s title condescendingly. “We’re trying to help you.”

 

Lena juts her chin toward her Lieutenant whose head rest limply onto his chest. “Then why is he tied up.”

 

“He has been quite difficult on the way here,” pipes up the other one who hit Luke unconscious.

 

Lena reigns in the anger and protectiveness she feels for her childhood friend, instead she holds her captive even harder against her.

 

“Why don’t we all calm down…” she hears the only one directly in harm’s way suggest placidly.

 

Lena ignores her for a second time. “Release him,” she growls menacingly to the short haired brunette who raises an eyebrow in challenge, ready for a fight.

 

“Come on, just take her down.” The other says dismissively, tending back to the fire. Lena knows she is screwed, if this woman wasn’t concerned for the safety of her friend, then it meant Lena wasn’t that big of threat to begin with.

 

“Last chance to back out,” her captive says.

 

Lena grits her teeth. “Go to hell,” she grips the rock even harder, feeling her palm trickle with her own blood before she is suddenly thrown to the ground over the blonde’s shoulder. Lena groans winded but promptly get back on her feet to see the damages she caused because Lena’s knows she pierced the blonde’s skin on her way down.

 

The woman is unharmed.

 

Lena looks back at her weapon and sees half of it had disappeared, broken off.

 

Someone quickly restrain her, tying her hands behind her back, the rock falling out of her grasp. She had her suspicions but she can’t help but still feel astonished that the person who saved her tonight really was Kryptonian and shocking her even more was the emblem on the blonde’s protective chest plate. Lena hadn’t notice it the whole time they were together, too busy trying to escape, too dark to see but also too tired to really pay attention, as she now watches the blonde unclip her cloak and walk toward the fire, her features now clearly illuminated and the crest of Krypton’s royal family glowing proudly into the night.

 

“Fuck,” Lena whispers shell-shocked as she is dragged and bound to the same tree as her Lieutenant. The woman standing by the fire was none other than Kara Zor-El, daughter of the woman who commanded the first Kryptonian army against the Luthor, the battle where her father was killed. The same young girl, who had now clearly grown up, Lena saw from the opposite ends of the battlefield for years. Until she no longer did five years ago. Lena thought the girl was dead but she had no way of confirming it.

 

Lena watches her talk to the other two women isolating themselves from her and Luke but remaining directly in their line of sight. This new tidbit of information was changing everything. Lena already feels the game of chess she thought she was playing rearrange itself in her head and she has the ominous thought that she might be utterly way in over her head. Of all people she had to be indebted to, it had to be her.

 

As soon as they stop looking at her, Lena scoots closer to her Lieutenant, kicking him in the shin in hope of waking him up. “Luke! Wake up!” After a few tries, she hears him groan.

 

“What?” Obviously still out of it, Lena lets him grab his bearing.

 

“It’s okay, you were knocked out,” she knocks her shoulder against him. “Luke, what happened?” She whispers as inconspicuously as possible.

 

She feels him nod against her, humming softly. “Are you okay?” he asks, still groggy.

 

Lena smiles, relieved. Her friend’s voice eases like a balm the deep loneliness in her heart. “Yeah, surprisingly.”

 

“Good. I tried to get to you… just before…” Lena feels him wince as he moves to make himself more comfortable. “… Just before you left. But King Lex got to me first. Lady Veronica was spying on us. She told the King that you left. He ransacked your quarters and began to round the Royal Archer’s company. I got Jess to tell them to hide before he could execute them all for treason.”

 

Lena expels a shaky breath. Of course, Lex was behind this. The three women are still talking animatedly by the fire and Lena shivers. She knew deep down that it was him but she hadn’t wanted to believe it. She had been clinging onto the image of the loving brother she knew and loved. “So, Lex framed us.”

 

“Yes, halfway through interrogation, he knocked me out. Next thing I know, I was standing in the middle of a burning village. It was a massacre. I tried to go back home but the Kryptonians caught me on my way back.”

 

“Does Lady Veronica know everything about our plan?”

 

“I don’t think so. I don’t think he would have wasted his time on me otherwise.”

 

Lena bites her lip in worry. She knew what she was doing was risky but she didn’t think they would have been discovered that early into her plan. A nagging feeling of concern for her company lodges deep inside her. “And the others? Who did you put in charge?”

 

Luke doesn’t respond for a moment and Lena knows that the answer won’t please her. “Eli.”

 

“What? He’s a kid!” Eli wasn’t even remotely ready for battle, Lena still sees him running after her every time she and Luke would pass by the village, with a bow twice his size nagging her to teach him, spying on them at the training field, with dirt on his face.

 

Luke laughs softly. “He’s nineteen. He’ll manage.”

 

“He’s reckless,” Lena replies, already imagining the worse. Since he joined the company at fifteen, Lena can’t help but remember all the times the kid got himself into trouble. Always picking fight with people bigger, better than he was, trying to prove something that eluded her.

 

“Only because he tries to be like you. You kind of like to take risk, Captain.” He whispers mockingly. Lena smiles, picturing the face of a brown eye ten year old kid looking at her like the hero she wasn’t. Luke is right. Lena shuts her eyes tightly in frustration, angry at herself. This happened because of her. She put everyone in danger. She should have planned better; she should have waited a bit more. And maybe they wouldn’t be in this mess.

 

Lena quickly gazes toward the three women, Lady Kara Zor-El still arguing quietly by the fire with the brunette with short hair, while the other one was attending to the horses. “Not as much as you. How come I find you attached to a tree anyway?”

 

He chuckles, “I didn’t play nice. I tried to escape a few times…” He nods toward the brunette talking with Lady Kara Zor-El. “I tried to knock the angry one down.”

 

Lena hums, stills observing them. “No wonder why she looked so eager to knock you out.”

 

Luke moves against the tree, restless, still trying to find a comfortable position. Lena wonders distractedly how long he’s been waiting for her tied up to that tree. “What do you think they want form us,” he whispers.

 

Lena sighs, still trying to understand how all the pieces fitted together. “I’m not sure but whatever it is, it can’t be good.”

 

“Wait… Isn’t that -” Luke coughs abruptly, choking on his saliva. Lena raises an eyebrow at him, asking him silently to be more discreet. He stops and looks at her puzzled. “Didn’t you tell me she was -” He whispers frenetically.

 

Lena shakes her head and interrupts him before he makes a fool of himself. “I was wrong. She saved my life.” Lena is feeling out of sorts herself by this enigma that was Lady Kara Zor-El.

 

“Odd. Do you think-”

 

“Quiet. They’re coming.” Lena watches Kara Zor-El approach followed closely by the angry brunette.

 

“Sorry for the treatment Princess Lena.” Lena nods warily, it’s the first time someone addressed her so formally since she had been captured. Lena can’t help but wonder why Lady Kara would observe protocol when her companions or even her fellow Kryptonians weren’t incline to do the same. She eyes the bonds and frowns. “We are going to release you -” she begins but is quickly interrupted by the scowling brunette who arches an eyebrow looking at her pointedly. Lady Kara sighs “– but only if you give me your word that you’ll both stop trying to escape.”

 

Well, where was the fun in that? Lena thinks, observing the Kryptonians closely, waiting for something that will betray their true intentions. “Why? Am I not your prisoner?” Lena asks, trying to goad them into a fight, or anything that will help her paint the portrait of this woman’s character.

 

Lady Kara shakes her head and smiles, something Lena wasn’t expecting. “Not at all. I have a proposition for you. But presently, we have to go before they catch up with us. I’d rather you come willingly, Princess.”

 

Lena ponders the question. Even if they somehow both escape, she doubts Luke knew where they were or even the direction toward the Luthor’s Kingdom or the Outlawed Territories. Lena hates feeling cornered.

 

Lena throws a look toward Luke who only shrugs in response. “Alright.”

 

“Great!” Lady Kara claps her hands with a big smile, Lena feels a little jarred by the perpetual grin she sees on the woman face. It was odd to be subjected to this unending joy and positivity. It makes Lena feel nervous. It leaves her waiting for the other shoe to drop.

 

Their bonds get taken away. “Well have to ride the rest of the night.” Lady Kara guides her toward a beautiful black horse. “You’ll ride with me, Princess. Your Lieutenant can ride with Lady Alexandra.” She says offhandedly, Lena looks back toward Luke and hears him groan as Lady Alexandra pushes him toward a grey horse, smirking dangerously at him.

 

“Don’t worry. She’s not going to kill him.” Lady Kara whispers teasingly close to her ears. Lena startles, taken aback. Lena narrows her eyes at the ever-present and genuine smile on Lady Kara’s face.

 

Lena watches Luke get on the horse with a frown and Lady Alexandra climbs behind him. The other woman, who has been tending to the horses is now stomping onto the fire, gathering their last belongings together.

 

“That’s Lady Margaret,” Lady Kara whispers again, ever the helpful one. “But she prefers to go by Maggie; you might get punched in the face if you call her by her full name.” Lena scowls. She hates that Lady Kara seems to be attuned to her thoughts and responds so easily to the questions running in her mind. She is looking at her with patience and warmth and it infuriates Lena even more. The woman only shrugs and smiles back at her less than sunny disposition. She holds a hand toward her. “Come on, I’ll help you get on the horse.”

 

Lena scoffs, puts her foots on the stirrup and get on the horse on her own. She hears Lady Kara laugh softly before feeling her pressed snugly against her back, her arms coming around her waist to hold on to the reins. Lena gulps, glad the woman can’t see the blush on her face.

 

As soon as Maggie get on her horse, their party is quick to leave their spot and make their way into the dark forest; Lady Alexandra at the front and Maggie bringing up the rear. Their horses trot into a path only illuminated by the moon.

 

Lena was no stranger to the pleasure of the flesh but being so close to Lady Kara and to have to move as one in order to facilitate the horse’s movement feels somewhat sinful. A feeling she never felt so keenly before, even with the other women she’s been with. Lena tries to shake the thought away, but it is quite hard not to think of something when that something is literally breathing into her neck, when her breath and body encase hers into a warm embrace. The jittery feeling in her veins might be because this woman behind her is still indirectly her sworn enemy and had been for years. It was only anxiety, Lena tries to persuade herself, like a prey sensing danger. Lena shuts her eyes tightly and pinches her lips. That still doesn’t explain the nervous butterflies she feels in her guts or the shot of desire she feels traveling down her spine every time the woman presses against her.

 

Lena feels a hand rest on her stomach soothingly. “Are you okay?”

 

Lena heaves the biggest sigh ever in her mind. Damn that woman and her attentiveness. “I’m fine,” she replies shortly.

 

Lady Kara doesn’t respond and Lena suddenly feels bad for her shortness toward the blonde. Especially when it was her own fault she couldn’t control her hormones. “I’m… It’s just been a long day.”

 

Lena feels her nod against her shoulder and she wonders for the tenth time if it is necessary for Lady Kara to be so close to her. “It won’t be long before we get to safety. You’ll get to rest then.”

 

Lena clears her throat, trying to get her wit back. “What are you going to do with us?”

 

She hears the woman behind her heaves a sigh, separating their body a bit; it felt like an ocean stood between them. “Not now but I promise I’ll explain everything when we’ll be safe.”

 

Lena hums thoughtfully and waits. That’s the only thing she can do. She watches the trees pass by, their trunk dark and twisted into claws, not unlike the fairytales she used to hear when she was a kid. Except that now, they were real. Lena doesn’t know if it’s a trick of her mind born out of fatigue or if those memories and old fears resurfaced because of the Kryptonian pressed against her

 

Lena suddenly tips her head back. She hears a small exclamation of surprise from the woman behind her before her head falls comfortably back onto Lady Kara’s shoulder. Lena chuckles softly, just a few hours ago, she was thinking about how she wouldn’t get to see the stars anymore. And now, here she is... Riding under the starry sky.

 

“There are beautiful, aren’t they?” Lady Kara whispers.

 

Lena expels a breath, the dark sky blurring into splotches of black and white as tears well up into her eyes.

 

“I used to…” Lady Kara pauses, unsure and Lena waits, time standing still. “I used to make up stories about them… with my aunt when she would teach me their name. We used to go to that beautiful field up the hill, just outside the castle, to look at the stars.” Lena feels Lady Kara shiver behind her, the arms that were encircling her waist passively before are now actively hugging her. Lady Kara was unconsciously drawing her closer to her either because of the cold or for comfort, either way Lena didn’t care why. All she does is relish into the warmth so freely given and waits. Lena doesn’t say how much she needs this too. “One time, we pretended that we were laying under a tent where the sky was the canvas and the stars were the little holes in it.” Lady Kara chuckles against her neck, embarrassed. “It’s silly.”

 

“Not at all.”

 

They both watch the sky lighten and the stars slowly disappear. Lena feels like they have come to an understanding. Just for the remaining of the night, Lena wanted to forget she was a Luthor and that the Lady behind her was of the House of El. A temporary truce regardless of what was to come and what came before. They could agree on this quiet moment meant to be cherished before the sky bleeds red again.

 

The horses slow down the pace, a sure hint that they are nearly at their destination. The thin wiry trees are now replaced by thicker ones, their branches going up high into the sky, creating a roof above them. They follow a river to their right hidden by the uneven landscape when Lena suddenly hears the unmistakable sound of a waterfall. The horses trot deeper into the forest, and Lena observes, alert, with an odd sense of foreboding grips her guts. She watches Luke’s hand a few meters from her taps softly against his thigh how many people he could see. They are surrounded. Lena sees a shadow move behind the trees. She stiffens and her sudden movement spooks the horse and Lady Kara calms him down quickly.

 

“They are with us.” Lady Kara tells her. It doesn’t stop her from scanning the surrounding area.

 

A beautiful waterfall stand before them and the horses stops. People come out of the trees, Lena watches Luke stiffens, ready to fight. Lady Alexandra dismounts from her horse, asking Luke to do the same. “This is one of the borders to Mars Republic. We’ll have to go behind the waterfall,” she tells them

 

It’s surprisingly a quiet affair. Their horse gets taken away and Lady Alexandra leads them to the waterfall, Lena fists her hand into the back of Luke’s shift, following closely. She shivers, her clothes still humid from the jump into the moat earlier. Lady Kara drapes her cloak silently onto her shoulders.

 

Lena never set foot to the Mars Republic. All she knows about them she learned it in old books from the Luthor’s Library. The land they lived in was divided in to five kingdom and this one had always been described as barren and harsh to those who lived in it.

 

The water is deafening, the tunnel hiding behind the curtain of water is slick and humid, light up only by torches and a bright light at the other end. The sound echoes everywhere onto the walls until it doesn’t. The light encompasses them before revealing a beautiful meadow, illuminated by the rising sun. Lena realizes in shock how terribly outdated their history books were.

 

A guard is waiting for them at the other end and leads them to the outpost where Lady Kara speaks briefly to the guards. Lena feels Maggie looming presence at her back, hammering unnecessarily the point that they couldn’t escape. They are then led to a bubbling village, bursting with people so different from those in her kingdom. People come and go, looking at her curiously. Lady Kara leads her toward a home where several people are already waiting for them. She waves at them with a happy smile.

 

This feels entirely surreal. They enter a house where maids are waiting for them. Lena arches a brow toward Lady Kara.

 

“I’ll let you wash up and have a meal and then we’ll talk. I promise.”

 

Lena nods. Luke is taken to another room while maids ask her to follow into a room where a hot bath is waiting for her. A bath never felt so good. Lena sighs contently as she emerges herself into the water. One of the maids giggle and Lena winks playfully at her. They scrubs her clean, brushes her hair and brings her a new pants and shirt, comfortable shoes and a warm black cloak to ward off the cold. They take her into a room where a freshly bathed Luke is waiting for her. Food is presented to them and they sink their teeth into the warm bread and broth warming their insides.

 

As soon as the food is cleared away, Lady Kara enters the room, freshen up herself, followed by Lady Alexandra. Luke stands and places himself behind his Captain, a warm reassuring hand squeezing her shoulder briefly, before Lady Kara sits on his chair, facing them, Lady Alexandra standing behind her.

 

The game is finally about to begin.

 

Lena isn’t much of a player but she’d rather have all the odds on her side than give her opponents the advantage. They look at each other and Lena attacks first.

 

“I thought you were dead Lady Kara Zor-El.”

 

“Oh, so you did recognize me.” She replies sounding surprised.

 

“Hard not to. You are not someone easy to forget.” Lena says offhandedly. Still remembering the lonely girl on the opposite side of the battlefield. Luke clears his throat. Lena realizes what she just said and tries again. “I just meant that I watched your blonde hair and your crest floats in the wind long enough that it’s imprinted into my mind.”

 

“Oh…”

 

Lena bites her lip in embarrassment. Luke snickers behind her. That came out wrong... She didn’t mean to- Lena sighs, frustrated. She is exhausted, give her a break. Lena changes the subject to a less slippery slope. “Anyway, what happened to you…?”

 

“Well, I didn’t die as you can see. But Krypton is not what it used to be.” Lena watches the woman steels herself, her blue eyes clouding suddenly. “There was a coup five years ago, General Astra took command. Her and her husband banished or killed everyone who disagreed with their policy. My parents were one of those. They got killed but not before they sent me away into hiding.”

 

“General Astra…” Lena muses. “She is the one I saw in the Great Hall, isn’t it?”

 

“Yes. She is my aunt.” Lena hears the pain barely concealed in the woman’s voice. She nods acknowledging the sudden melancholy in that simple statement, images of stars and laughter blurring into her mind.

 

“I understand. My brother hasn’t been the same since he took the crown.” Lena offers quietly.

 

“Power changes people.”

 

Lena shakes her head. It would be so easy if it was the case. To believe that her brother was still innocent, that the responsibility and pressure of the crown could explain her brother’s cruelty and justify his needs of knowledge and power. “I don’t think so. I think it only amplifies who they really are.”

 

“You don’t think they can be saved?”

 

“No, there is nothing to save. Sometimes some people are just bad. There’s nothing you can do, except protect yourself and the ones depending on you.”

 

Lady Kara hums thoughtfully. Lena sees that she is not really convinced by what she just said. “I was at your trial yesterday.”

 

Lena nods and smirks, ready to fight. “Do you agree with them? Do you think me guilty?”

 

“I don’t know yet.”

 

Anger bubbles just below the surface, ready to explode. She couldn’t explain this sudden need for this woman to be in her corner... This longing for someone to believe in her... She knows she isn’t being fair. Somehow, without her notice, she came to respect and admire the Kryptonian. “Why save me then?”

 

“That’s what people keep asking me.” Lena’s eyes stray to the stoic brunette glaring daggers at her. “But I prefer to judge people on their own merits.”

 

Lena scoffs. “We’ve been at war for more than a decade. I think my merits are considered crimes in Krypton.”

 

“They are. Like mine are in your Kingdom. Anyway, I was made aware of the correspondence you keep with Lady Cat Grant of the Outlawed Territories.”

 

Lena narrows her eyes. That witch.

 

“We have been allies for years. She showed them to me.” Lady Kara expels a breath and looks directly into her eyes. Lena feels bewitched. “The asylum you are seeking for you and your people is only a temporary relief. The war isn’t about the Luthors and Krypton anymore. Krypton has been making advances into the Outlawed Territories recently. And they allied themselves with Daxam a year ago. The only thing protecting you is your Kryptonite reinforced border but even that will be overwhelmed by the army General Astra is building.”

 

“What do you want from me, then?” Lena is grateful for Luke’s solid presence at her back. Always watching, always protecting her.

 

“An alliance. The resistance is led by my cousin Kal-El in the Outlawed Territories where he is pushing back the General’s army back into Kryptonian’s border. But you must be aware of our biology. While we are not immortal our skin is impenetrable. It does make killing us nearly impossible.” Lady Kara sighs, looking suddenly more tired than Lena ever seen her so far. “It’s a doomed battle. They are more casualties on the Outlawed side than Krypton’s. We need Kryptonite.”

 

Lena nods, now with a clear picture of the situation. “Which had only been found in Luthor’s Kingdom...”

 

“Yes.”

 

This was unexpected. The land was in far more turmoil than she had thought. If only Lex hadn’t been so bent into closing down their borders, onto turning a blind eye to everyone else but Krypton, they could have put an end to the war way before their kingdom starved itself. They could’ve have seek out allies and take the load of war off their people’s shoulders for a bit. “I fled. You must be aware that I’m not really high into my brother’s good grace, right now. To go back would be a death sentence for me... Why would I accept?

 

Lady Kara Zor-El, blonde hair and blue eyed knight, sits proudly in her polished armor with the proud crest of her house on her chest plate, and looks at her with such intensity and hope that Lena feels stunned for a few seconds. “You were asking for a fresh start for you and your people. I’m giving you one but you’ll have to fight for it. It’s the only way. You’ll die if you do this on your own.”

 

This woman sitting before her is otherworldly. It’s the only explanation Lena has to suddenly consider staging a coup against her own brother and make it sound noble. This woman was asking her to commit treason without batting an eyelash, challenging her to step up her game. To be on par with her. Lady Kara makes it sound like she could be a hero if she wanted to. “You are asking me to overthrow my brother.”

 

“Yes and I’ll help you in any way I can.”

 

Lena waits, letting that offer sink in. She never wanted to lead. She always saw herself in the shadows. Helping her people one step at a time, walking with them through a peaceful life like they used to when her father was king. “If I do succeed and give you the Kryptonite. What guarantees do I have that you won’t betray me? That you won’t overtake my kingdom when everything is done?”

 

“My word.”

 

Lena scoffs. “Your word is not enough.”

 

“She saved your life!” Lady Alexandra protest indignantly.

 

Lena looks at her impassively. They need her. Lady Kara was a kind soul... Lena could say that much. She didn’t want lives to be lost especially if there was a way she could stop it. Lena was their solution and it gave her incredible power. In this game where Lena felt blindsided and helpless the whole time- she finally has something she can work with. She finally has leverage. It was time to make her move.

 

Lena retreats to that calm place, a meditative state she always went under before letting her arrows fly. Her heartbeat slows down. Everything comes into focus. Lady Alexandra in spite of her stoniness is definitely anxious, betrayed by the tightness in her shoulders and the hard grip she has on the pommel of her sword. Lady Kara is more open, easier to read, and yet this openness was deceiving. If Lena judges her only by her expression Lena would think that the woman was calm if only slightly worried as showed by the crinkle on her brow. Her sunny disposition hides the nervous tick in her hands. It hides the rage, helplessness and sorrow of a drawn out war. Lena reads it easily in her eyes and the set of her shoulder and in the way she hides herself behind her bright smiles. Lady Kara looks like she knew sacrifice and the burden weights heavily on her shoulder.

 

Lena has to be smart. She has to make this alliance airtight and make her demand now. Luke steps up closer behind her, his support a solid presence at her back. It’s sink or swim.

 

Lady Alexandra glares at them with open distrust.

 

“What do you want?” Lady Kara finally asks annoyance and anger shining for the first time briefly into her eyes.

 

An idea suddenly hits her and Lena smiles, sitting back comfortably on her chair, watching them squirm. Lena never thought she would one day do this willingly, let alone be the one to propose it. “Marry me.”

 

The gasps and look of shock in the room is enough satisfaction to quiet the nerves she feels in her stomach.

 

The stoniness Lady Alexandra had showed so far was quite impressive now that Lena can actually see how much she is thrown by what she just said. Anger and a deep protectiveness move her body, hiding Lady Kara temporarily out of their sight. “Kara, you don’t have to do this. Let them fend for themselves, we don’t need them.” Lena hears her whispers frantically. She smiles and waits, hiding her trembling hands under the table. Luke puts his hands on her shoulder calmly and Lena breathes easier.

 

“You know that we do.” Lady Kara says, a battle of will silently happening between the two women before Lady Alexandra nods and takes her place back behind the blonde.

 

Lena waits. Lady Kara is looking intensely at her, a quiet pain appearing in her eyes. It was nearly enough to make Lena feel bad.

 

“I accept. I will bind myself to you.”

 

Of all the reckless things she has done, Lena thinks this one certainly takes the cake.

 

 

 

 


	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> Thank you for all the kudos and reviews. The chapters keeps getting longer and longer but I hope you will enjoy it. I took a lot of liberty in that AU, some characters might be OOC, I'm not sure. But I hope it's still enjoyable. Tell me what you think.  
> Happy reading! :)

 

 

Lena isn’t someone who gets her feeling hurt easily. At least, that’s what she thought before Kara Zor-El proved her wrong.

 

The past few days went by like a blur. They had moved deeper into Martian’s territory and closer to the Outlawed border. She spent most of it sleeping, recovering from her captivity. Luke would give her updates, tidbits of information from his excursions into Mars Republic with Maggie. The woman had been tasked to keep an eye on him while still showing him the ropes of this new world. If they are to be allies, Lena wants her Lieutenant to have the most complete understanding of the conflict they are now fully stepping into. To walk in blind was unacceptable. Too much was at stake.

 

And while her Lieutenant was out and about, Lena is confined into a house attending meetings after meetings. Every day, Lady Alexandra is giving her a crash course on Foreign Policy. Something Lena cruelly lacks. Lena listens distractedly from her seat at the windowsill of the study, her attention split between the stern teacher and the kids running outside.

 

The Luthorians were cut out from the rest of the others Kingdoms by Krypton and the ocean at their back. And while the temptation to see what lay beyond the ocean had been great, it had been thwarted by the numerous disappearances of their ships. Rumors quickly grew into legends that only the void laid beyond, swallowing the sun every night only to spit it back every morning to swallow the stars instead. Their fishermen never went beyond the horizon where they couldn’t see the lighthouse anymore in fear of falling into the void, never to be seen again.

 

Instead Luthorians set their eyes upon Krypton and again, the numerous failed attempts to explore this unknown territory and their neighbor’s constant refusal for a diplomatic visit had birthed all kind of stories which integrated itself into their education. They had lived between two giants in relative peace for decades until her father tried to march into Krypton. Lena does know that, at least.

 

Apparently, Krypton didn’t used to be a military kingdom. It dedicated years to science till an experiment went wrong with kryptonite and altered their biology. It had been a token of peace of a century old Luthorian King until the Kryptonian discovered its destructive powers and asked the King to never dig it up of the sea again for fear of retribution. They had been reclusive ever since, keeping their secret close to the chest. Only their skin had been affected. They could feel pain but their skin couldn’t be harmed and didn’t bruise. Other than that, they were very much like anyone else.

 

Lena sighs and rubs the bridge of her nose, listening to Lady Alexandra weave again the political push and pull between Krypton and Daxam, an ancient colony of Krypton that went rogue, fifty years ago. Lena learns that a few Daxamites shares Kryptonian’s particular biology through inter-marriage and had spent years trying to steal their secret by incorporating more Kryptonian’s into their kingdom by marriage, sometimes forced so that they could also benefit of the impermeability. But even if the topic is fascinating, Lena can’t stop the jittery feeling from overtaking her leg, taping her foot rhythmically against the wall. She hasn’t been outside for days. And as nice as this house is... She feels like she traded a cage for another. Lena looks out toward the window and drowns out Lady Alexandra’s voice.

 

“Both Mars Republic and the Outlawed Territories didn’t have armies until a few years ago…” The woman clears her throat and stops irritated. “You are not listening to me.”

 

Lena tears her eyes away from the window. It frustrated her how she couldn’t go outside without being escorted. Lady Kara told her it wasn’t safe but as the days go by; Lena wonders if her not being allowed to leave this house is more for their protection than hers. “No, sorry. I just… I’ve been cooped up in here for days.” Even though Lena feels like their relationship is rather cordial, Lady Alexandra still looks at her with a scowl on her face. Lady Kara explained to her the relationship she had with the knight and Lena thinks that Lady Alexandra being her future sister-in-law doesn’t really helps her case, if anything it seems to give her even more incentives to figure her out and glare daggers at her. “I’m not going to escape. If that’s what you are afraid of.” She tries again, hoping she will let her have a walk in the village.

 

The knight sighs, putting aside the lesson for today. She leans against the table, guarded. “Why did you ask her to marry you?”

 

Lena arches an eyebrow. “Why?” She asks, the question formulated more like a challenge than the expression of her puzzlement because really, Lena is confused. They had both been in the room when Lena made her proposal. It couldn’t be clearer why she asked Lady Kara to marry her.

 

“Answer me first.” She crosses her arms making her look even more intimidating than she already is. But Lena will be damned if she let the knight know that.

 

Lena shrugs. “I thought that was obvious. It’s the only way for me to make sure my kingdom won’t be harmed.” The knight clenches her jaw, fuming. Lena frowns, even more confused. “It’s nothing out of the ordinary. Isn’t political marriages done here…?” She trails off uncertainly, wondering if customs do change that much between the different Kingdoms.

 

“It’s not the same for Kryptonians. They bound themselves for life.” The woman stresses, looking at her dead in the eyes.

 

Lena huffs irritated. For the past few days, they were all having these conversations where Lena completely felt left out because of her shamefully lack of knowledge of Kryptonian customs or Martians customs or other things Lena had been too isolated to know. She never felt as alien as she was feeling now. She feels like they didn’t remember that for the last ten years, Lena only knew how to best kill a Kryptonian. She is trying, so hard, to learn all these facts. These obvious facts people look her down for not knowing. “Great, isn’t that the purpose of a marriage? To create an ever lasting peace between two factions for eternity. Till death do us part? Listen, I don’t know why you are so shocked about this. It’s been done over and over again.”

 

“Kryptonians don’t believe death breaks a bond. If anything it reinforces it. They don’t cheat, they don’t remarry.”

 

Lena takes a breath and looks back out the window. She can’t let herself get work up over this. She closes her eyes and puts her forehead against the cool window, letting the sun warm her face through the glass. Why would it be so important for Lady Kara’s sister in all but blood to tell her this and try to hammer it home? Why would she insist on the fact that Kara couldn’t be with anyone else now, but her. Lena suddenly looks at the stony knight, who looks back at her with sad eyes. “She already has someone, hasn’t she?” Lady Alexandra remains silent. It’s enough for Lena to confirm her thought. She really can’t do anything right, can she? She can now add Lady Kara to the long list of lives she destroyed.

 

“This may just be a political marriage to you,” Lady Kara’s sister spits, showing more passion and tenacity than Lena has ever seen from her. “But for Kara? This is life changing. It is spiritual. You already took her choice away. Don’t take that too.”

 

Lena doesn’t know what to say. She doesn’t know how to express her regrets of having reduced what was clearly a dear belief for Lady Kara to a political move. Lena doesn’t know what she can do to make it better or how to soften the blow. She only saw this marriage as a means to an end.

 

“I understand duty and I understand your position,” the knight concedes softly before her eyes narrow threateningly. “But if for any reason your hurt her more than you already did… I swear Luthor... I will have your life.”

 

With that said, Lena watches her leave. And to think Lena thought they were somewhat getting along.

 

Lena turns her gaze back to the outside world and watches life play itself on the street. She has never really thought of marriage before. For her it was only an inconvenience she would have to partake in someday when the kingdom would demand it of her. But as it is, Lena prefers the freedom of a single life. Marriage was only a contract where both parties could legally get the resources, influences or power they wanted from the other. Marriage didn’t involve feelings, at least not for royalty, and especially not for her. Lena had been told relentlessly that her role was to be married off into another house of the Luthorian kingdom. She learned to view it as a necessity and a power play rather than the great love often depicted into the stories maiden told each other.

 

Serving in the army had thankfully put a temporary hold to that expectation. All she had to worry about was to stay alive.

 

And yet, now after hearing how important this ceremony was to Kara... Lena feels guilty. She did exactly what her mother had wanted to do with her. Lena only thought of this as a political move and didn’t take into account what Lady Kara felt about this. She didn’t know she had also been playing with Lady Kara’s feelings. It hadn’t been her intentions.

 

A knock at the door suddenly brings her back to the room, to that old smell of books and scented candles arranged throughout the study. A second one echoes into the room and Lena sighs. She stands and goes to open the door revealing the one who has been occupying her thoughts more and more lately.

 

Lady Kara smiles shyly, fidgeting at the door. “Princess Lena… Hi!”

 

“Hi.” Lena responds surprised and amazed by the sheer energy pouring out of the woman before her. “I haven’t seen you for awhile.”

 

Ever since Lena’s proposal, Lady Kara had been in and out the house Lena was staying in, never staying too long, always in a hurry. It made Lena wonder if the Kryptonian was avoiding her. “I know. I had to prepare for the ceremony. It’s going to be a huge celebration for the Resistance.”

 

“Of course.” Lena nods. She has seen from her window the whole village begin the preparation for their ceremony. Bouquets of flowers, chairs and tables being carted away.

 

“Would you…” Lady Kara pauses unsure or embarrassed, Lena doesn’t really know. It makes her want to apologize for the obvious discomfort she puts the woman in. “Would you like to accompany me to the garden and see the preparations? Alex told me you were feeling a bit trapped.”

 

“Yes, I would love that.” Lena steps out of the study and loops her arm into the surprised Kryptonian’s arm. Lena wanted to see the playful, confidant woman who wasn’t afraid to banter with her, who felt free to tease her or talk some sense into her when she had been a jerk.

 

“Oh, uh… Alright.”She watches Lady Kara stammers painfully before taking pity on her and begins to walk toward the front door. They pass blushing maids on the way and Lena can’t help but tease them by pressing Lady Kara’s defined arm closer against her.

 

Nothing beats the feel of the sun caressing her skin. It feels like being hugged by warmth and enveloped into the light. A tangible presence always on her skin, a protector thawing her iced bones after a long day spent in a cold castle, pretending to be made of ice when she only wanted to lie under the sun. It felt like running through open fields with messy hair, shaking with uncontrollable laughter. It felt like spending long hours training outside and feeling the joy of hitting bulls-eyes every single time or the easy camaraderie with her company, challenging each other to silly games. The sun feels like freedom and Lena closes her eyes and turns her face toward the sunlight, soaking up every bit of warmth she can, trusting her betrothed to guide her and not let her fall.

 

“I’m sorry, I never meant for you to stay in that house. It’s just… No treaty has been signed yet and up until we are bound, you remain in danger. Even here. You made yourself powerful enemies. Krypton is all over looking for you, Princess Lena.”

 

Lena hums softly, the sun no longer the only one to be able to warm her. “I can imagine.” Lena presses her cheek softly against her betrothed clothed shoulder and makes the decision to take the first step. She has to at least try to make this binding meaningful. “Just Lena is fine.”

 

“Sorry?”

 

“You don’t have to follow protocol. I feel like no one really does, here. So, call me Lena. It’s fine.”

 

Lena sees the smile stretch on the woman’s lips and she hears her test the sound of her name, whispering it softly. “Then please, call me Kara.”

 

Lena smiles and for the first time in a while, she feels like she is finally doing something right.

 

“Are you nervous?”

 

Lena opens her mouth, ready to deny any feeling of dread and anxiety at the idea of what was to happen tomorrow. Ready to put on her armor and be calm and confident but Lady Alexandra’s words appears at the back of her mind and Lena finally decides to go with honesty. Lena would like their relationship to be built on trust. That’s the least she can do for the woman who saved her life. “Yes.”

 

“Me too.” They finally step into the garden, a bit outside of the village and see the beautiful way the villagers decorated the place. The wooden tables and chairs didn’t look out of place, they had been dressed with flowers from top to bottom, delicately weaved around the wood as if they had been carved into it. A beautiful arch stood before the setting sun, painting the garden in gold. “I asked for the arch to be placed here.” Kara says, her eyes twinkling with contentment. “In Krypton, binding ceremonies are done before the sun, Rao, at sunset. It symbolizes the end of our journeys on our own and the beginning of a new one, together.”

 

Lena nods mesmerized, watching the sunlight pale in comparison to Kara’s brightness. Kara made her feel things she couldn’t explain. This woman was simply riveting. Lena now understands why Lady Alexandra was so protective of her. There was innocence and candor shining bright in those blue eyes that made Lena wants to fight anyone who dared to try diminishing that light.

 

“I never thought that day would come so quickly.” Kara chuckles. “I just… I imagined it differently I guess,” she finished wistfully and Lena feels like she suddenly can’t breathe.

 

“I’m sorry.” Lena whispers, looking away. “Your sister explained to me how important this ceremony is to you.”

 

“Don’t apologize. I understand why you did it. You needed to protect your people. And I, mine.” Kara sighs and Lena looks back toward the woman who gazes toward the arch with a faraway look. “I just… I wished my parents were here, you know.”

 

Lena nods, she felt the same. “I’m sorry about your parents.”

 

“I’m sorry about your father.” Kara replies solemnly, burdening herself with the responsibility of her father’s death.

 

Lena slips the hand resting on Kara’s arm into her hand and holds it in reassurance, holding the burden together. She hopes Kara understands that it wasn’t her fault. Any of it. War had a way to take away those dear to the hearts and leave those left behind only with memories and void-shaped days in their place.

 

“I’m sorry your mother can’t be here.” Kara says suddenly.

 

“Lillian Luthor isn’t my mother.” Lena confesses. Kara faces her, surprised. “I am King Lionel’s bastard daughter.” Lena exhales. They couldn’t erase what happened in the past but if Kara wanted support or someone to count on out of this ceremony... Lena would gladly give it to her. “Listen, I know tomorrow will be about politics and war and alliance. I just… I want to promise you my friendship. Circumstances lead us here but we can decide on how to go forward. I’d like for you to be my friend.” Lena says sincerely, eager to leave her own mark into this new future.

 

Kara beams facing her. “Yes. I’d like that very much,” she says squeezes her hand in return.

 

Lena smiles wide with joy before seeing the face of her betrothed slowly fall, looking at something behind her. The smile so bright just a moment ago transforms into a frown, conflict and heartbreak battling in her blue eyes. Lena looks over her shoulder to see a man waiting at the entrance of the garden. Tall and strong, oozing stability, puissance and virtue. The figure of a true knight.

 

Kara clears her throat suddenly behind her. “Ah… Lena. Uh, this is Sir James,” the woman stammers as the man finally makes his way to them.

 

The knight stops in front of them, nodding his greetings. “Lady Kara, Princess Lena.”

 

“What are you doing here? I thought you were with Kal…”

 

Lena watches the conversation unfold, retreating slowly to the shadows. Observing the tension between these two come to life.

 

“I heard of a wedding,” he says charmingly with a grin on his face. “I just wanted to participate to the celebrations…” he trails off, still never taking his eyes off Kara. “And offer my congratulations, of course. Kal-El’s too.”

 

Kara nods sadly. “He’s not coming?”

 

“I’m sorry. There has been another wave of attacks lately. They are making preparations to withstand a second one.”

 

Kara smiles pleasingly. “Yes, of course.”

 

Sir James was looking at Kara as if he knew the pain her betrothed was in, deeply familiar with a hurt Lena had no idea about. Lena watches them both interact and it makes her realize how her stroke of genius, the political move she had been so proud of when she came up with it, threw a wedge between these two people. He was the person Lady Alexandra had been alluding to. He was the one Lena forbid to offer love, comfort and safety to the beautiful woman soon to be her wife.

 

Lena has to go. She has to leave. She can’t bear the weight of that burden anymore. Not tonight. “It’s getting dark, maybe we should go back…” she says quietly to the two figures suddenly remembering her presence. She sees Kara blush before expelling a breath and composing herself back together. Ever the charming and helpful creature.

 

“Of course, Princess Lena.” She puts a hand at the small of her back guiding her forward and nods to the knight who nods back. “Sir James,” Kara takes her leave with a nod. They walk down the path before Sir James’ voice resonates in the silent garden.

 

“Wait,” time stops. She feels Kara turn back toward the knight, she feels her hold her breath in anticipation but Lena doesn’t turn around. She will let them have this moment. “There are things I need to discuss with you… And the Council. Daxam is pushing on the other side of the Outlawed border, Kal-El is asking for reinforcement…”

 

“We’ll talk of this tomorrow morning, before the ceremony.”

 

“Of course. Thank you.”

 

“Let’s go,” Kara whispers, prompting her to move forward. To go back to the house. Lena is now keenly aware of the physical distance standing between them. The chill of the night take Lena in its arms and she shivers, suddenly cold.

 

“You will let me attend that meeting, won’t you?” Lena asks, breaking the silence. She has the nagging feeling Kara still keeps things from her. She never heard of that Council Sir James spoke of despite of the innumerable meetings she attended and Resistance officials she met. It makes her wonder what game Kara was playing with her. Letting her think she was involved into the Resistance while never mentioning what sounded like to be a Council that could give executive order.

 

“Of course.”

 

Lena doesn’t press further. The woman seems distracted, looking at the ground intently with a crinkle between her brows. Lena will let this play out and she’ll act depending on if Kara finally figures out the role she wanted Lena to play in this alliance, now that they are betrothed.

 

They arrive at the threshold and Lena stops. Kara looks up suddenly, surprised to be arrived already.

 

“Thank you for showing me the garden.” It had felt nice to have that conversation with the blonde. Lena felt like it brought them a little bit closer.

 

Kara blushes. “Ah, you are welcome. I’ll see you tomorrow? I’ll come and get you for that meeting.”

 

Lena smiles gratefully. “I’d like that. Thank you.”

 

Kara fidgets, nervously passing her hands through her hair. Lena waits, enjoying watching her fluster. “Well, goodnight.”

 

“Goodnight.” Lena replies watching Kara nods one last time before she leaves toward her quarters. Lena opens the door and greets the few maids still in the foyer, busy with the preparations for tomorrow. Before she can retreat to her room for the night, one of them speaks up.

 

“Princess Lena, Lady Alexandra and Lady Maggie are waiting for you at the study.”

 

Lena nods her thanks and deviates from her initial trajectory to go to the study. As she opens the door, she sees three ladies waiting there for her.

 

“Princess Lena,” says the one Lena doesn’t recognize, a beautiful woman with blonde hair and kind eyes. “I am Lady Eliza Danvers, Alex’s mother and Kara’s guardian.”

 

“Oh,” Lena lets out unwillingly, surprised and looks furtively at the passive face of Lady Alexandra and Maggie’s encouraging one. “Hi, it’s an honor to meet you…” Lena curtsies, years and years of strict teaching and etiquette suddenly coming back. She wished she had better clothes than that simple dress, used more for comfort than formal meetings.

 

“Oh, please don’t.” Lady Eliza says, walking promptly toward her and taking her hand. “None of that here, we are going to be family.”

 

Lena nods, speechless and a little perplexed at the beginning of a mocking smile she sees on Lady Alexandra’s face.

 

“Lady Eliza wanted to do some robes fitting,” Maggie says motioning to the arrays of robes on the other side of the room with a curtain brought for her to change behind.

 

Lena sees the smile fully stretch on her betrothed’s sister’s lips, “Well, I’ll let you have your fun,” she says in a way fun had to be the last word to describe what was about to happen. “Maggie, come get me when you are finished... I’ll be kicking Luke’s ass in the courtyard.”

 

“Will do, love.”

 

The woman takes her leaves and Lena sighs.

 

Lady Eliza shakes her head at her daughter’s antics and smiles eagerly at Lena. “It’s so lovely to meet you, dear. Excuse my daughter. She never had patience for this type of things.”

 

Lena is surprised. Lady Eliza sounds genially excited for the ceremony. Lena wonders if Lady Eliza knew the truth about this marriage and just decided to ignore it.

 

Maggie makes herself comfortable in the armchair near the fireplace while Kara’s guardian hands her the first dress out of many. “Here, lovely. Take this dress and go change. I’ll help you with the laces.”

 

Lena lets herself be swept up in the woman’s excitement, smiling genuinely at the oohs and ahhs uttered by this new ray of sunshine, fully invested in making her the prettiest bride ever. Lady Eliza helps her put on the robe while recounting anecdotes of her girl’s childhood. Maggie participates from time to time in making fun of her wife and sister-in-law. It wasn’t anything Lena thought she’d experience one day, ever. To see this look of pride and awe directed at her every time she stepped out of the curtain to show how her figure fit in a wedding dress. Hers.

 

Even Maggie’s dimples, she had gotten used to see when the woman made fun of her, didn’t infuriate her anymore. Her teasing and little quips every time Lena changed dresses now made her laughs, chasing away the dark cloud that had been hanging over her head for awhile. This entire thing felt silly and yet, Lena never felt so at ease.

 

Lena steps out from behind the curtain for what feels like the hundredth times. She twirls a bit looking at the way the dress flows around her leg waiting for Lady Eliza’s thoughtful opinions and Maggie’s responding jokes. Nothing. Lena looks up expectantly at the two women who stare at her speechless.

 

“What?”

 

“I think that one’s perfect, dear.” Lady Eliza says with a watery smile.

 

“Oh,” Lena walks toward the mirror and admires her reflection. The long sleeved white dress hugs perfectly her figure, a perfect mix of dark red velour and white lace, with gold embroideries on the bodice.

 

“Yeah, Luthor.” Maggie nods, walking toward her, admiring her from different angles. “First time I saw you I didn’t think you could clean up this nice.”

 

Lena laughs. “First time you met me, I had just got out of a month long captivity and jumped into a moat to escape.”

 

“Lucky for you Kara was here to make you seem more impressive.”

 

Lena shakes her head, chuckling softly.

 

Lady Eliza appears behind her and Lena meets her eyes in the mirror. “You are beautiful, dear.”

 

Lena blushes, running her hands on the gold embroideries.

 

“I’ll go get Alex.” Maggie says walking toward the door before she stops. Lena looks at her curiously. “You got a lucky star following you, Luthor. You can’t do better than Kara.”

 

Lena nods and gulps. She goes behind the curtain to take off the dress, feeling Eliza nimble fingers at her back undo the laces. She waits, dreading the conversation she was sure to have with her future mother-in-law. Lena liked her and she didn’t want to hear about the disappointment Lady Eliza was feeling about her being the one to marry her daughter.

 

“Don’t listen to them,” Lady Eliza says instead. “I know they are giving you a hard time but I’m glad that it’s you.”

 

“What makes you say that?” Lena whispers.

 

Lady Eliza hums soothingly. “I know my Kara. She is kind, selfless and has the biggest heart I have ever seen. But she can also be brash and destructive when she thinks she hasn’t done enough or feels guilty. She tends to give her all to others and what she thinks is right despite her feelings.” She sighs, Lena waits with a pounding heart. “Call it mother instinct but I feel like you are a good match for her. You’ll remind her that there is more to life than duty, bravery or heroism. Sometimes, it’s okay to want things only for yourself. You’ll remind her that her life belongs to no one but her, won’t you?

 

Lena nods, feeling a lump in her throat, tears welling up in her eyes. “I will.”

 

Lady Eliza smiles and squeezes her shoulder gently. “Here you go, my dear.” Lena feel the bodice become loose. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says before stepping out of the room.

 

Lena doesn’t sleep that night. She goes to Luke’s room in the middle of the night and sits at the foot of his bed, Luke looking at her confusedly before going back to sleep. Lena brings her knees to her chest and waits. She waits for the sun to rise, hoping that being near her best friend will appease the mad fluttering of her heart.

 

The sun rises and her heart still hasn’t calm down. Lena wakes Luke up and goes to prepare herself for when Kara will come get them for the meeting with this Council. She is waiting in the study when a maid come get her, telling her that Luke and Kara are waiting for her outside.

 

The mood is somber this morning as Kara doesn’t meet her eyes and quietly debriefs Luke in from what she understood Sir James say the night before. Lena follows them silently, lost in thought, Lady Eliza words on repeat in her mind as she watches the morning light reflects in Kara’s gold hair.

 

They arrive to a hidden door, near the guard’s outpost. Kara knocks three times before it opens. They walk into a barely lit corridor before arriving into a round room with a big round table at the center. Lena is surprised to see mostly familiars’ faces around the table. There was Lady Alexandra, Maggie, Sir James, Lady Eliza and two men she doesn’t recognize. The first one introduced himself as J’onn Jonzz, head of Mars Republic Intelligence while the other stammered his name: Winn Scott, black-smith and engineer.

 

Lena nods her greetings before they all sit.

 

Sir James puts an end to the tense silence. “I come with news from the Outlawed battlefront. And they are not good. While Kal succeeded in fending off the Kryptonian’s army from going any further into the Outlawed Territories, we received intelligence that a cavalry of 300 to 500 and 800 to 1000 Daxamites’ foot soldiers are marching toward the Outlawed border, intending to trap the Resistance between two battlefronts. We think that the move is only meant as a first wave to weaken the Resistance. We do not have any information on when the second wave will occur or how many Daxamites it will involve.”

 

“When is the first wave of Daxamites estimated to arrive?” Lady Alexandra asks.

 

“Two week at the most. A week, if we are unlucky. ”

 

“How reliable is that information?” The Head of Mars Republic Intelligence asks, deep in thought.

 

“The number of Daxamites footmen may vary but otherwise they are already on their way. Our spy told us they left two days ago from Daxam’s capital.”

 

“Kal needs reinforcements.” Kara suddenly intervenes. A determined look on her face.

 

“We are not ready.” J’onn Jonzz says, like he already argued this point with the Kryptonian before.

 

“Neither were the Outlawed Territories and yet, they have been fighting, on and off for more than four months, defending the border.”

 

“We no longer have the manpower to support a strike like this, Kara. All our soldiers have already been commissioned to defend the several key passages we share with Krypton. The President will never authorize this.”

 

“Then make him!” Kara hisses angrily. “If you don’t, there is a high probability that Kal’s Army and what’s left of the Outlawed Forces will fall. And then there will be nothing to stop them from marching here.”

 

The arguing halts to a standoff.

 

Lady Alexandra rubs the bridge of her nose and sighs, sharing a look with her sister. “Kara is right, J’onn. If they fall, we all fall.”

 

“I hear you but Mars Republic’s defenses are already at its minimum. We can’t send any more cavalry. I can ask for 200 to 300 pikemens and maybe 800 footmen at the most. But it’s all I can give.”

 

“What about archers?” Lena asks. Everyone looks at her, silent. “Don’t you have crossbowmen?”

 

“Not really. Maybe 100. 200 at the most. Not enough for a battalion.”

 

“You don’t need a battalion to make a difference. 200 archers is enough if you know how to place them and when to attack.”

 

“What do you have in mind?” Kara asks looking at her for the first time.

 

“You have the advantage of the terrain. Use it. If we hurry enough, we can lay traps that we can trigger from a distance. We can lead them somewhere narrow enough for the crossbowmen to reduce significantly their number... The best would be for the archers to be on high grounds. The infantry can pick the rest of the Daxamites out at the other end.” Lena knows it’s not standard formation but she quickly learned that they weren’t rules in warfare, only survival.

 

“That’s dirty. I like it.” Maggie winks at her, all smiles.

 

J’onn J’onzz looks at her appraisingly. “You would lead the charge?”

 

Everyone waits with baited breath. Luke straightens on his chair. Lena is the Captain of the Luthor’s Royal Archers. Archery was her turf. Lena nods. “Yes.”

 

“You’ll be on the front line.” Kara frowns, a hint of worry in her voice.

 

“Archers usually are. We attack first.” Lena replies.

 

“What do you need?” Lady Alexandra asks, looking at her without the perpetual scowl but a spark in her eyes proof of her interest.

 

“As many archers as you can. I’ll need at least 100 footmen with pavises for defense and to help the archers reload. Crossbows, a longbow for me if it’s possible. Mine has been confiscated…”

 

“I can do that.” Winn quips for the first time.

 

Lena smiles. “And thousands of arrows, as many as you can. Flammable ones too.”

 

“On it,” Winn smiles widely, the joy of a challenge shining bright in his eyes. He scribbles notes furiously onto a paper, nearly jumping out of his seat in excitement.

 

“Luke can explain to you what I need. I’ll have to see the terrain first before formulating a plan but I’m confident that we could take out most of their cavalry and reduce their infantry by a third after the archers launch their attacks.”

 

“How do you know it will work?” Sir James asks. “It’s not like you have Kryptonite to help you.” He adds, narrowing his eyes. Luke stands abruptly. Lena puts her hand on his arm, asking him to sit back down.

 

Once Luke is seated Lena stands, tired of being ridiculed, tired of being belittled and made feel like she didn’t have a place at this war table. She looks at every one of them, meeting their appraising eyes, smirks and curiosity dead on. “I’ve been fighting Kryptonians for more than ten years, Sir James. Six of them without Kryptonite and with less soldiers and even worse odds than this. So, yes. I’m fairly confident we can make this work. With or without Kryptonite.” Lena arches her eyebrows, making her point across while Sir James glares at her.

 

“But shouldn’t you be focusing on getting us Kryptonite?” He continues. “After all, you’ve only been brought here for this. Your marriage only stands on you being able to provide us with Kryptonite.”

 

“James.” She hears Kara say in warning. But the man doesn’t stop and put his hands on the table, towering over her from across the room.

 

“We might win the battle but if you die on the battlefield, we’ll lose the war.”

 

Lena nods. Sir James had a point. She wasn’t safe from danger even here in a relative safe place. In the long run she had to put her hands on the Kryptonite. However not participating in that battle against the Daxamites might as well cost them the war. “I see your point Sir James. If you can find someone better qualified to lead a handful of barely trained archers against ten times their number without them ending all dead, then I will leave for Luthor’s Kingdom at first light tomorrow. But in the off chance that you can’t, there is also no point for me to put my life on the line getting Kryptonite only to deliver it to an army that’s been crushed because they didn’t have enough manpower to defeat an enemy at their back.” Lena stresses.

 

“You are right,” Kara says to her and quickly looks away, fiddling her thumbs. “But we can’t risk you, Lena. We need Kryptonite.”

 

Lena nods and feel herself deflate. Indeed, that was her main purpose here. She looks across the table and her eyes meets Lady Eliza’s who smiles encouragingly at her with patience and confidence – confidence in her - shining in her eyes. Lena turns toward Luke who looks at her curiously. Lena watches the shock quickly followed by horror and anger appear in his eyes as he realize what she is asking of him.

 

“No.” he says categorically.

 

“You will.”

 

“What’s happening?” Winn asks, confused like everyone else.

 

Luke stands next to her. “I’m not leaving you!” He whispers but his anger makes his voice loud enough for everyone to hear.

 

“I need you to. Time is against us and I’ll need someone on the inside for when I’ll come.”

 

Luke eyes the rest of the table warily before looking intently in her eyes, silently pleading her to change her mind. “Look at what happened the last time we went our own way. We got framed and sentenced to death in less than a month time. What you need is someone to watch your back!”

 

“I will.”

 

They both turn to Lady Alexandra who smiles softly. Luke jaws drops to the floor. Lena is speechless.

 

“I thought you didn’t like us…” he stammers, confused.

 

Lady Alexandra scoffs. “It doesn’t mean I want either of you dead. I’ll watch her back, Luke. I promise.”

 

“We all will.” Lady Eliza adds. “You are both member of the Resistance now.”

 

Lena looks toward Kara who smiles at her wide and confident, nodding vigorously along.

 

“You will need someone to help you reach Luthor’s Kingdom undetected.” Maggie says to Luke and then meets Lena’s eyes, with warmth and something akin to respect in her eyes. “I’ll be his guide, Princess.” The title sounding more like a term of endearment than the insult it used to before. “We’ll take a few men with us; it’ll be a piece of cake.”

 

“Everything’s settled then. Princess Lena will lead the Archers while Luke will head to Luthor’s Kingdom.” J’onn J’onzz resumes. “Let’s all rest before the ceremony. You’ll all leave tomorrow at first light. Dismissed.”

 

It’s a flutter of movements, everyone having something to do to prepare for the ceremony this evening and the departure tomorrow morning. Lena stands there, still a bit tongue-tied. Overwhelmed by the sudden support, they got from everyone. Still in a bit of a daze, Luke guides her toward the house there are staying at for her to get prepared.

 

As soon as she crosses the threshold she is taken away by numerous maids who take care of her till she is finally ready.

 

"This is it," Lena whispers, as she looks at her reflection. She smooths for the hundredth time the beautiful dress Lady Eliza gave her, feeling her hands tremble slightly. Luke suddenly comes in, ready to walk her to the ceremony.

 

“I’d never thought I’d see the day you would get married.” He says in-lieu of greetings.

 

Lena exhales. “Me neither, to be honest.”

 

He stands next to her, both watching their odd reflection showing them an image they never thought they would get to see one day. “Are you nervous?”

 

“Immensely.”

 

“Whatever happens, I have your back. You know that, right?” Lena nods, taking his hand in hers, drawing a bit of his courage into her. “The rings are done, exactly the way you asked me to.”

 

“Thank you,” she says distractedly.

 

He nudges her shoulder bringing her back to him. “Come on, Lena. I know you, there is something bothering you.”

 

“It’s just…” She sighs, feeling confused and hopeful and afraid all at the same time. “Lady Alexandra told me something. She said how important this ceremony was for Kara. And…after everything that’s happened today I guess I want to make it special for her… I don’t know.” She chuckles derisively, and presses a moist hand onto her forehead.

 

Luke takes her hand away from her forehead and holds it still. Lena wonders if he can feel them tremble. “You? The cynical lover?” He states softly with a smile.

 

“I know!” Lena bursts frustrated. Of all days she has to be in tune with her feelings... Today had to be the day. “It doesn’t make sense. But somehow, it just makes me hope for more. I don’t know what Kara thinks of this but I just… I just want to try to have that too.” She feels tears well up in her eyes.

 

“I’m going to hug you alright?” She nods burrowing herself in his embrace. “Have you told her this?”

 

“No, only that I wanted us to be friends.”

 

He burst out laughing.

 

“What?”

 

“Are you kidding me? I’m your friend but her…” he trails off, shaking his head. “She looks like she could be way more.” Lena laughs before he looks at her more seriously with the kind of tenderness someone only feels for their dearest friend. “I don’t want to be cynical but we live in dark times, this ceremony may be the last good thing for the whole Resistance. Don’t feel guilty to want a shot at happiness.”

 

Lena exhales. So grateful to have him grounding her and supporting her when she felt like everything was falling apart. “Yes, you are right. I should go tell her. Do you know where she is?”

 

“To your right. At the end of the hall.”

 

She smiles and rushes to the door. She had to be quick before the ceremony began. “Thank you!”

 

“Go sweep her off her feet!” She hears him say through the door as she runs to the end of the hall, her dress sweeping the floor. Lena smiles and goes toward the woman who changed her life. She doesn’t know what she’ll say to her. Only that they could try to be something more and maybe Lena will tell her that she’ll win her heart someday, if Kara lets her.

 

Lena knocks softly on the door but no one respond. After a moment, she opens it and her heart stops. Kara, looking as beautiful as ever in her beautiful dress, is locked into a kiss with Sir James. The strong and noble knight Kara had wanted to be with from the beginning.

 

Lena closes the door, crestfallen and squashes all her silly thoughts of something more.

 

She goes back to her room where Luke is waiting for her surprised to see her back so quickly. She only shakes her head and wait for things to go back into motion. She hears Luke say things to her, she feels his arms wrap around her. She understands that the knock on the door is to tell them to walk down to the garden. She sees the beautiful arch Kara showed her yesterday, glowing under the setting sun.

 

J’onn J’onzz waits under the arch patiently with a small smile when he sees her. Luke squeezes her hand in support as they walk the aisle, the smiling people standing on either side blurring into a big messy blob of color and Lena breathes deeply. She stands next to J’onn J’onzz waiting for her bride while Luke stays behind her.

 

Kara suddenly comes in and everyone cheer. She is beautiful. She only saw it briefly earlier but now, under the soft glow of the sunset, she is magnificent. She is the sun. Kara smiles at her shyly and Lena respond with a smile of her own, brilliant and wide to hide her trembling lips.

 

J’onn J’onzz ties their hands with a big red threads on each of their wrists meant to stay forever and then a white one to tie their hands together during the ceremony. The vows are pronounced. Lena slides a ring, the only thing left from her birth mother and that she asked Luke to engrave something on the inside, on Kara’s finger. They are now forever bound.

 

Lena hears the cheers and joyous cries of the people surrounding them. Lena smiles for them. Kara holds their bounded hand up for everyone to see.

 

The white cord gets taken away, leaving them with the red thread on each of her writs and a ring on their finger. She sees Kara smile, hugged by her friends and family. Lena renews silently the promise she made to Kara in the garden yesterday.

 

Lena will not try to win her heart but she will happily be her friend for as long as Kara wanted her to.

 

 

 

 


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!!! I feel like I fried my brain writing that one. I don't know anything about Medieval warfare, I took everything from Wikipedia. If there is any inaccuracies, they are all mine. And I just want to say that there will be Angst, but fluff too. Just enough to make you want to scream the next time angst comes. :) 
> 
> Anyway, thank you for the kudos and comments. It's great to read what you think. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. Take care!

 

 

 

The dull thud of her arrows hitting the target repeatedly was the only thing keeping her sane at the moment. Nock, draw, release. Over and over again.

 

Luke left with Maggie yesterday and Lena already feels his absence deep in her bones. After the ceremony, everyone had been wonderful with her. Lena saw how much the Resistance really needed something to celebrate about, something to take their minds away from the impossible odds they were facing every day. A marriage was the perfect excuse to let loose and dance, drink and laugh.

 

The whole village came to enjoy the night and Lena forgot the heartache she experienced before the ceremony. She had fun. She let loose and laughed and danced, dragging Kara along in the mist of the partying crowd. Kara had stayed by her side the whole time, smiling and joking and dancing with everyone. Lena had felt like it was the best way to honor the promise she made. Even if she didn’t believe in the symbolism of the ceremony, Kara did and as Lady Alexandra reminded her, she ought to at least treat this binding with respect. She didn’t see Sir James at the celebrations and Lena wonders if that’s why Kara had stayed by her side.

 

Day two of the life in camp and Lena misses the support, the easy camaraderie and the comfort of her friend. She is now without a Lieutenant to oversee the training of her recruits. Lena had forgotten how tiring it was to handle the pure logistics of a squad. She was used to plan. Give orders and then lead not to make sure that everyone brought their crossbows before coming to training or if they took the bolts meant for training and not those meant for combat.

 

Lena nocks an arrow and inhales deeply, draw and release. She knows that the recruits she got don’t have the training nor the years of experience in archery they have in her Kingdom. From what she understands, the Outlawed Territories and Mars Republic never had the need to raise an army before. The population was mainly townsfolk living a normal life- Until now that is.

 

It makes her miss the Luthor Royal Archery Corps. A little more than ten thousand trained archers at her command. Four thousand archers employed fully and six thousand in reserve as a rotation, some still in training. The smallest Corps in all the Luthor’s Army but by far the deadliest and the most successful. Her father had encouraged the use of the bow throughout competitions all over the kingdom from the youngest age. It had been his subtle way of spotting those with a natural disposition for archery or showing promise for the discipline and enhancing their talents by enrolling them in the army later on.

 

After their first battle and defeat, Lex had launched several full on attacks in the hope of capturing Kryptonian’s soldiers and makes them reveal the secret of their invulnerability. Lena knew he did experimentations on their prisoners. She can’t forget the image of Lex standing in his lab, examining the insides of a Kryptonian soldier. He had discovered that once dead, their body wasn’t invulnerable anymore. Lena still sees his smile at the discovery, his hands full of blood and gore as he tells her that it was for the good of their people. He told her that it was the only way to save them. Lena had closed her eyes then, more preoccupied with the mess Lex had stirred outside with Krypton.

 

Archers were always the one to patrol the border, their long range weapons a slight advantage against Kryptonian’s cavalry. Krypton had been furious by the capture of their soldiers and had attacked again and again, demanding their release. Something Lex had refused to do. Lena had been asked to defend the border, years after years. They had used every means possible to thwart Krypton’s attacks with traps and fire, boiling oils, rolling beams down the hill, burning poisonous trees. Even though their skin was impenetrable, they weren’t immune to shock or poison. They did everything to stall them until the infantry arrived. For the first sixth years, it had been a bloodbath. Lena couldn’t tell how many soldiers they lost. And then when Lex infused their arrowheads with Kryptonite, it had felt like a salvation. Like they could finally breathe for the first time.

 

The only thing stopping Lex from launching an all out war was their number. Six years of doomed combat took a toll on their population. The war reduced it by half and Lex began to recruit them younger and younger. Still, the sheer number of the Kryptonian Army was surpassing them at least five to one. For the last four years, archers became one of the main dissuasive forces keeping Kryptonians at bay. Lena doesn’t know what it means for her kingdom now that they were all forced into hiding.

 

Nock, draw, release. Mars Republic gave her one hundred and fifty soldier loosely trained in archery. The first time Lena saw them shoot, she knew she would have to rely on the crossbow more than the longbow. It wasn’t ideal but she didn’t have the time to train them. The longbow required years of training, it was taxing, demanding a lot of the archer’s body in term of strength and endurance. But where the crossbow lacked in range, shooting rate and precision. It made up for its brute strength and force of penetration. If she could train them enough to launch an attack of five minutes straight, Lena would consider most of her job done.

 

She had spent a lot of time with Winn and his team, altering her demands of arrows to heavy bolts that could penetrate the heavy chainmail of the Daxamites. The man was brilliant, in less than a day he had designed bolts and arrows with better stability she has ever seen. He was now working on designing her protective gear, now that he finished her longbow. The poor man had been working non-stop.

 

Nock, draw –

 

“Captain!”

 

Release. Lena watches her arrow hit the target, way off the bull eyes, feeling the beginning of a headache pulse behind her eyes.

 

The woman stops next to her, worry in her eyes. “I’m sorry. Captain Danvers, asked me to deliver you a message. She can’t make it, she has a meeting. Her words.”

 

Lena sighs. “Alright.” They had planned to scout the route the Daxamites were likely to go through on their way here and established the best spot for an ambush. Lena can’t wait for Lady Alexandra to finish her meeting; they have to have a map of the land by the end of the afternoon. She looks at her recruits, some laying on the ground, exhausted from the intense training she made them go through, some sharing food with others in silence.

 

“Have you ever shot with a crossbow before…?” Lena trails off waiting for the woman to give her name.

 

“Vasquez, Captain! And, yes I have. ”

 

“Who are you assigned to?”

 

“Captain Olsen, on the Third Infantry, Captain.”

 

Lena muses, appraising the woman silently. “Follow me.” Lena walks toward a new target, picks up a crossbow and training bolts. “Here, sixteen bolts. Show me how fast you can shoot.” Lena challenges Vasquez who nods determinedly. The woman puts her knee on the ground, lining the crossbow on the target, feeling the ground for the position of her bolts. The challenge didn’t go unnoticed by the other recruits who gathered behind to observe. “Go!”

 

Vasquez shoots bolts after bolts, her muscles straining at every draw, before releasing the bolts all hitting the target and picking another one. Again and again. “Stop!” Vasquez stops, releasing a breath, a bit of sweat pooling from her temple. Lena is impressed. Six bolts in one minute. It was better than all the recruits and the most Lena saw someone shoot in one minute had been nine bolts by someone who had been training for it her whole life. Lena hears impressed claps behind her. Vasquez smiles embarrassed. “Alright,” Lena nods satisfied. “Get a glove to protect your hands from the whipcord. I appoint you Sergeant of the Archer’s squad. You now answer to me.”

 

The woman looks at her in shock. “Yes, Captain.”

 

Lena turns to her recruits. “Break’s over. Everyone in position!” The recruits scramble to take back their respective place, in front of their target, bolts lying before them. Ready to shoot. “Vasquez, you’ll supervise their training while I notify Captain Olsen of your reassignment to me. I need to gather a team. I’ll be back in two hours. You’ll take Captain Danvers place in the scouting mission.”

 

“Yes, Captain!”

 

Lena claps her hands, asking for everyone’s attention before heading out. “Keep up the good work everyone. Training is over in two hours!”

 

“Yes, Captain!” They all respond before turning back toward their target, waiting for Vasquez to give the signal.

 

Lena turns away from her squad, feeling confident. What they lacked in training, they made up in enthusiasm and willingness to learn. It was something all Captains could hope for from the people they lead.

 

Sir James’ office isn’t far away from the Town Hall where Sir Kal has established his Command Center. Lena only has to walk for twenty minutes from the training field to reach the center of the Village, the camp of the Resistance spreading all around.

 

It was rare to have a moment of quiet these days. Lena knows how consuming war can be. It eats her away at night when she tries to sleep, during the day when she tries to think. It’s a constant worry at the back of her mind making her doubt every one of her decisions. Decisions that could mean the life or death of the people depending on her. She knows she isn’t the only one plagued by those thoughts. She hears Kara wake up at night from the other side of their tent, kicking her covers away and gasping for breath.

 

They had been sharing a tent ever since the ceremony. Logistically it was easier to make them share a tent. Supplies were harder and harder to come by. But Lena knows also that it is easier for them to keep an eye on her. The alliance was fresh, after decades of war; Lena would have done the same thing.

 

Instead, Lena takes her time and makes the most of it by roaming the fields, stopping by a few villagers and making conversations. Anything to take her mind away from the war.

 

She takes the stairs leading to Sir James’ office, no longer able to stall any further. She has only seen him in passing since the ceremony. And the animosity and wariness she knows he has against her, doesn’t really make her want to repeat the experience they had at the Council. Lena laughs softly at the memories. They had been fighting like two peacocks displaying their train for everyone to see.

 

Lena stands before the door and hears voices behind the thick wood arguing violently: Sir James’ and Kara’s. Lena sighs, wondering why it always falls upon her to stumble into awkward moments between these two. She couldn’t hear what they were saying but it didn’t sound pleasant. She knocks loudly and interrupts the shouting match. The door opens with Kara looking like steam was coming out of her ears.

 

“Kara, Sir James…” Lena greets pleasantly, but cringes inside at her bad luck. “If I can have a word with you Sir James… That would be greatly appreciated. It won’t take long.”

 

“I was finished anyway,” Kara says stepping out of his office without a second glance at Sir James’ pained face.

 

Lena nods, closing the door behind her as she steps into his office. Sir James looks at her warily from behind his desk, standing at his full height with a scowl on his face. By the tension still lingering in the room, Lena senses that what she intended to be a five minutes meeting might as well be the beginning of a second round. “Listen, I just came here to say that I took Vasquez out of your Infantry, to serve in mine. She has –“

 

Sir James laughs, looking at her incredulously. “Ever since you came here, all you do is take.”

 

Lena narrows her eyes feeling the conversation slide away from Vasquez into something more personal. Lena clenches her jaws before continuing what she came here to do. “She has shown incredible abilities with a crossbow and I have absolute confidence she will do well in the Archers’ Squad.”

 

Sir James raises an eyebrow. “You couldn’t come to me before making that decision? You don’t even know what position she had in my Infantry. And you just took her away.”

 

Lena hears the contempt clear in his voice but still keeps her calm. She won’t be playing into his game. “I apologize for that. But when I see potential I ought to take it.”

 

“Every soldier is essential to a formation. Disrupt the formation and everything falls apart.”

 

Lena huffs. “No offense, Sir James, but you lead an Infantry of five thousand soldiers in Sir Kal’s Army. I lead one hundred and fifty archers to the front line in a week. I won’t apologize for putting all chances on my side.”

 

Lena narrow her eyes as she sees the anger and despair suddenly take over in his eyes as his voice booms into the silent room. “All chances? You call a marriage all chances?”

 

Lena suddenly steps toward him, staring him down coldly, restraining herself from lodging an arrow in his neck. “You will calm yourself, Captain. I’m not your pushing bag.”

 

He gulps, realizing suddenly what he just said. Lena watches him deflates and sits back on his chair. “I’m sorry. I was out of line.”

 

“I won’t apologize for that.” Lena hisses making perfectly clear that she had no regrets marrying Kara.

 

“You took away her choice.” He whispers incredulously.

 

Lena feels like screaming, instead she snarls exasperated. “I didn’t chose that for myself either! I did what I had to do to ensure my survival and that of my Kingdom. Wouldn’t you have done the same for your people?” Lena sighs, and rubs the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache hit her full force. “Listen, I came here to tell you that Vasquez is transferred to my Squad. That’s all. I’m not asking for permission. It’s already been done.” Lena turns to leave the office when she turns back. “Beside, me being married to Kara doesn’t make me entitled to anything. Kara is still her own woman. She can still make her choice.”

 

“Does she know that?”

 

“No. But she will.” Lena steps out of his office, in as bad of a mood as Kara was. She goes down the stairs, eager to leave the building and take a breath outside.

 

Lena is surprised to see Kara waiting for her just outside the building, leaning against the wall with a scowl on her face. As soon as their eyes meet, the blonde’s features ease into a gentle smile.

 

“Hi. I haven’t seen you all morning.”

 

“I’ve been training my recruits.” Lena leads her out of the way and they both walk around the village.

 

“How did it go?”

 

“Not good but not bad either. There is still a lot of work to do but I am confident they will be ready in a week. I recruited a woman named Vasquez as my Sergeant. She was in Sir James’ Infantry before. That’s the reason I came to talk to him.” Lena says watching Kara suddenly close herself off. Lena waits to see if Kara will talk of what happened between them just before she interrupted them.

 

“I’m sorry you had to go after me.” She whispers, small and apologetic.

 

Lena waves the apology away. “Don’t worry about it.” And leads them toward a beautiful wheat field just outside the village. They walk enjoying the sudden silence now that they were far from the hustle of the village.

 

“He asked me to give him the command of the Infantry against Daxam.” Kara says suddenly with grief in her voice, looking at the ground, such a sharp contrast from the woman Lena came to know.

 

She raises an eyebrow, surprised. Lena takes Kara’s hand and stops her from walking further. “What? Why would he do that?”

 

The blonde looks at her, a quiet pain shining in her eyes as she shrugs. “To protect me.”

 

Lena scoffs. “There’s no protecting from war. Unless you go and hide.” Lena sees the beginning of a smile stretch Kara’s lips. “What did you tell him?”

 

The woman laugh, looking relieved. “Exactly what you said. I was just so angry.” Lena watches Kara become suddenly more animated as she rages against Sir James. “He made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. There are enough officers doubting me because I’m Kal’s cousin, I didn’t think James doubted my capabilities to lead too.”

 

Lena sighs, suddenly puzzled by their relationship. “I’m sure he didn’t mean it that way. He cares about you, that’s all. We all want to protect those we care about.”

 

“You don’t.”

 

Lena stops breathing, staring at Kara indignantly and pained. Of course, she cares.

 

“I mean you care, right? You must care a bit,” Kara continues, not really paying attention to her or expecting an answer. “And yet, you didn’t ask me to step down, nor did Alex.”

 

Lena gulps and shrugs. “Why would I? We’ve known each other for a long time, military wise. If there’s anyone that can do it, I’m convinced it would be you.”

 

Lena suddenly sees Kara stop and soften. It was like with only a few words Lena succeeded in containing this incredible energy flying everywhere without control. Kara hides her smile by looking to the ground. Lena stares fascinated and a little bit in awe as suddenly all the intensity of that energy is directed at her.

 

“Thanks.” Kara whispers, looking shyly at her.

 

They make their way back toward the village in silence, enjoying the sunlight and the fresh air before they were both too busy paying attention to anything other than the war.It is peaceful. It feels normal. Something any couple would do...

 

“I… I have to go to a meeting soon. Where are you heading to?”

 

“Winn’s forge,” Lena says, pointing to the other way Kara is heading to. “I need to gather the engineers to map out the land.”

 

“Oh, yes. Alex told me she couldn’t go anymore.” Kara says and frowns suddenly. “Are you going to be alright?”

 

“Of course. Why? Are you worried about me?” She asks with a teasing smile.

 

Kara laughs and shakes her head. “I do know you too, military wise, Captain. Find me when you are finished? Someone gave me those little cakes you liked at our binding. I hid them in our tent,” she whispers conspiratorially.

 

Lena laughs. Of course that was something Kara would remember. If there’s one thing Kara is passionate about, it’s food. Lena remembers Kara asking her opinion on everything she tried at the ceremony, giving her pieces of everything, sometimes all at once.

 

“Be careful!” Kara finally says, worry easily read in her eyes. The reality of the battle closing suddenly upon them.

 

“I will! See you later, Kara.” Lena says with a reassuring smile. She leaves toward Winn’s forge but not before catching the glint of Kara’s ring from the corner of her eyes as the blonde waves her goodbye.

 

*******

 

It is odd, Lena thinks, to see an open field and know that it will be the grave of hundreds of soldiers. To hear the wind coming from the pass of Daxam’s mountains be replaced by the screams of rage, fear and howls of pain. To see the swaying green grass become wet with blood, flattened to the ground under fallen bodies. Lena jumps off her horse and lands on the soft ground. The soils is still untainted, rich and innocent before its first taste of blood, before it asks for more.

 

“We’ll do it here.” Lena says, holding her horse by the reins. She casts a look around, inhaling the earthy smell of the valley and tries desperately not to think of smoke, sweat and despair.

 

Vasquez jumps off her horse, and stands next to her, looking around pensively. “We are well into the Outlawed Territories; they’ll be only twenty kilometers from the back of Kal’s Army.”

 

“I know but closer to the border and we’ll risks detection from their scouts. I’m sure they are waiting for an ambush at the pass. They must already have men stationed there as we speak.”

 

“We can take their scouts out. Why don’t we attack them there? Wouldn’t the Archers have a better advantage up on the mountain?”

 

“We would but there are only one hundred and fifty of us. We are only the first strike. Our aim is to create confusion, panic. Slow down their progress for our infantry to engage. Lady Alexandra showed me a map. Even if we escape detection, the pass is too narrow. While we may do some damages at first, the fight will only drag on. The outcome will be determined on who can last longer. The odds aren’t too great for us... Daxam has way more soldiers than we do.”

 

“Last report states three hundreds mounted knights and more than a thousand foot soldiers.”

 

Lena nods, feeling Vasquez eyes on her. The worry, fear and doubt rolling off her Sergeant like a poisonous fog, dulling Lena’s senses.

 

“Do you think we can do it?” Vasquez whispers. Lena is glad for the woman’s judgment. She couldn’t have the recruits and engineers behind her hear them and think she had any doubts about this.

 

“Of course,” Lena lies. She doesn’t say that it will be tight. She doesn’t say that the reports they are getting are changing every day. Command was overflowed by information sometimes growing, sometimes reducing the size of the Daxamite’s forces. Lena has the nagging thought that the only thing they can do at this point is reduce the size of the attacking force as much as possible for Kal’s Army to pick them off later. Lena smiles reassuringly at her newly appointed second in command. “How long have you been in the army?”

 

Vasquez blushes. “Four months. I got recruited in the Resistance when Krypton first marched on the Outlawed. I was a guard before that. The only exciting thing happening was hunting a bear from time to time.”

 

Lena nods, feeling a twinge in her chest. “We can do it, as long as we prepare ourselves the best we can. They might outnumber us, but we’ll have the elements of surprise with us. Winn will work on it as soon as we give him the layout of the land. We have more than a fighting chance. Keep up the good work with our recruits, Sergeant.”

 

“Of course, Captain!”

 

Lena watches the woman leave to join the several recruits, scouts and engineers at their back to do what they came here to do. Scouts promptly leave to scan the area. The others begin to map the land and examine the ground. Lena sighs. Sometimes, believing in victory was more important than the odds themselves.

 

Lena inhales the fresh air one last time before joining them. She throws herself into the planning and strategizing wholeheartedly... If only to distract herself from the countless lifeless eyes staring back at her.

 

It is well into the night before they make their way back to camp.

 

Lena leaves fifteen scouts to guard the valley as a first outpost before they can begin to work a strategy for tomorrow. She dismisses Vasquez and the rest of the recruits and leads the team of engineers back to Winn’s forge at the village.

 

It’s like stepping into a hive. The team of engineers thanks her and goes directly to work, exchanging ideas and information as they go further and further into the building. There is a flurry of movements surrounding her, sounds of hammer against wood, steam from the various red-hot swords plunged into water. Men and women throwing themselves in the war effort. Lena sees countless of swords and shields being repaired, piles of spears, pikes, bolts and arrowheads all waiting to be used. It never ceased to amaze her.

 

She asks for Winn but they redirect her to Command where a meeting is taking place. Lena sighs, and steps out into the cold evening air. She doesn't want to go. Those meetings are only an excuse for other Captains and Officers to complain about the smallest of things. Sure, it is an effective way to forget the war while still working on it... by focusing on the silly preoccupations of camp and cohabitation. The Command center in Luthor’s Kingdom didn’t look like that. Frankly, when it came to life in camp, everyone knew to stay out of the others way. The King gave his command and everyone obeyed. Simple. It’s the first time Lena saw a meeting where everyone get to speak their mind and argue on end without being interrupted by the leading authority.

 

Lena takes the reins of her horse and walks toward the Town Hall with knights, squires and all sort of military personnel running about. A squire comes to attend to her horse. Lena thanks him and steps into the building. It’s full. Captains, Officers all talking above themselves. Sir Kal and Kara are listening to them from their seat, at the other end of the room, behind a long table. Lady Alexandra and Sir James stand behind, the first looking bored and the other one weary. Lena only spares them a glance before joining Winn listening from his spot near the window.

 

“What are they arguing about?” Lena whispers.

 

Winn looks bored out his mind but his position of Head Engineer made those meetings obligatory. Much to his dismay. “Patrol duty, latrines… You name it… Do you have the plans?” He asks looking at her more alive than five seconds ago.

 

Lena nods and shows him the copy of the plan his engineers gave her.

 

Winn heaves a relieved sigh. Happy to be finally able to ditch the meeting. “Thank you!” He looks toward the other end of the room. “We have to get Kara.”

 

“Leave that to me.” Lena gives him the plan. “We’ll meet you at our tent.”

 

Winn nods and quickly leaves the building. Lena gets closer to the mob of Knights and puts herself directly in Kara’s line of sight. The bored expression on the woman face changes quickly when she meets Lena’s amused eyes. Kara rolls her eyes, a smile stretching on her face, before she leans toward Kal and whispers something in his ear. He nods and Kara promptly leave with Lady Alexandra close on her heels.

 

Lena waits for them outside leaning against the wall much like Kara did earlier. Kara emerges a few minutes later and clips her cloak over her armor. “Hi!”

 

Kara smiles and rushes toward her. “Thank you! You saved us in there. If I had to hear one more time about Sir Carr and the latrines being too close to his tent, I was going to explode…”

 

Lady Alexandra heaves a sigh of her own. “Me too. Thanks! I wished I came with you on that scouting mission. I feel like my brain is about to melt.”

 

Lena smirks. “Happy to be of help. Shall we go? Winn is waiting for us.”

 

“Yes, please.” Kara says, looking eager to leave the busy place behind.

 

Lena walks quickly to the tent she shares with Kara, the two women following close behind. She had been apprehensive at first about living with Kara, but now, Lena find it quite pleasing to have someone with whom to talk to. Being Kara’s friend turns out to be easier than she first thought. Past the first few awkward moments of being forced to live in close quarters... It’s easy to forget that they are married with the stress of the impending battle looming before them. To be honest, Lena feels much better now, without the expectation of having to make this relationship be something more. Something worthy of what Kara had in mind before being bound to her.

 

Lena set ablaze by what Lady Eliza had told her, got ahead of herself without real consideration of the reality before her. Lena much prefers the easy companionship they have now. It was something she was more accustomed to. Something she felt more at ease with. Like several time since Kara first came to save her from her cell, Lena feels like they have come to an understanding. They weren’t defined by their past or future actions as a Luthor and an El, only by the person they were under their heavy armor of duty, honor and leadership.

 

They step into the tent and find Winn leaned over the map with a deep look of concentration on his face. “That is a good spot.” He says looking at them.

 

Lena smiles. Kara and Lady Alexandra both go to examine the map and nod at Winn’s statement. They all gather around the table, eyes fixed on the map. The layout was quite simple it was a two hundred meters wide field that ran for five kilometers with a little patch of forest on the left side hiding a drop into a river and a wooded hill on the other.

 

Kara points to the hill on the map. “I suppose we’ll be attacking from here.”

 

Lena nods, meeting Kara’s eyes standing next to her. “That’s the idea. The woods are dense on the hill, it will give us a perfect cover to wait for them. The best would be to push them to retreat here,” she points to the forest on the other side of the field. “And fight them with the drop at their back. The only risk is their number. What did the last report say?

 

Lady Alexandra sighs, rubbing her forehead, looking exhausted. “The scouts reported a cavalry of 300 and 1800 soldiers.”

 

Lena looks at Lady Alexandra in consternation. “Why do their numbers keep growing every day?”

 

It’s Kara that responds this time, looking as exhausted as her sister. “James believes they are recruiting along the way.”

 

That wasn’t good. They all knew that. By the time they reached the border they could have multiplied their army by two. Lena has the nagging thought that it wasn’t just a first wave meant to distract and divide their main army but an attack meant to lay a settlement or outpost at the back of their army permanently.

 

They all stare at the plan lost deep in thought.

 

Lena crosses her arms looking intently at the map. There's thousands of possibilities and tactical moves that appear before her eyes not unlike a game of chess that would play itself between the lines and scribbles of the map. Lena winces suddenly as she feels the strain of the day take over her mind. The lines of the map blurs before her eyes. She quickly puts a hand on the table to stop the swaying when a warm hand immediately covers hers. Lena looks up into intense blue eyes, fixed on her, asking her to breathe. She does. A weird sensation of déjà-vu appearing in her mind as the fog lifts away.

 

“The valley is too wide,” Lady Alexandra suddenly says, clearing her throat. “Their number might give them the advantage to counterattack at our back if we move too fast. They’ll be encircling us.”

 

Lena breathes deeply, seeing the confusion on Lady Alexandra’s and Winn’s faces at Kara’s hand on hers. But Lena is grateful for the hand still holding hers, grounding her to the moment. “We’ll have to take down the cavalry first or they will beat us on speed. The archers can do that. But we will be vulnerable against their infantry while we attack.”

 

Kara squeezes her hand not on board with the archers being so close to the field. “It’s risky. The crossbows have a shorter range than the longbow; the archers will have to be at the front line.”

 

“Only for the duration of the first attack.” Lena defends. “We’ll have to anyway, if we want our bolts to be able break through the trees lines. Winn already has pavises that we can camouflage with branches and mud.”

 

Winn nods at them but Kara still frowns at her, clearly displeased with the idea. Lena knows that in standard formation, archers attack from behind the Infantry but for an ambush in a wooded hill, Lena can already imagine the disaster of the countless of bolts hitting trees trunks instead of their enemies.

 

Lady Alexandra puts an end to their glaring match. “From how I see it, we’ll have to attack on three sides: their front, their flank and the rear. Close on them like a clamp in order to make them retreat toward the forest without us being surprised by a riposte.”

 

Kara shakes her head, a scowl appearing on her face. “We don’t have enough manpower to do that.” Kara reminds them. “Spread it too thin and the Infantry won’t last long.”

 

“How about the cavalry?” Lena asks Kara. “Is Sir Kal going to lend us some?”

 

“Yes. 300 mounted Knights and 600 soldiers.”

 

Lena groans, feeling a twinge of panic inside her chest. “That’s not enough.”

 

“We know,” Kara says frustrated. “But the troops are tired. They are the only able bodied still left from the reserve. There has been an illness spreading through the Army, the infirmary is full. Eliza is at her wit’s end and we think Krypton is going to schedule an attack sometimes next week. At the same time Daxam should arrive here.”

 

Lena nods. It is clever. Even though the Resistance had a big Army, most of it was tired and hungry, having fought for four month without respite. It was a war of attrition Krypton was slowly winning. A second front would give them an opening. It would stretch their resources and tire the Resistance even further.

 

Winn grimaces, scratching his chin deep in thought. “It resembles more and more like a guerrilla, if you ask me.”

 

Lena perks up. “A guerrilla, you say?” She hums. They didn’t have the number, that was for sure but they had the terrain, they can work on it. “That’s a good idea.” Winn beams at her. “Let’s say we attack here,” Lena says pointing at a point in the middle of the field. “We set traps at the center to destabilize them.”

 

Kara laughs suddenly, “What like rolling beams? Didn’t you do this against Krypton’s cavalry before?”

 

Lena stares at Kara, surprised and smirks. “It worked, didn’t it?”

 

Kara rolls her eyes. “Only because your border is uphill.”

 

“Wait,” Lady Alexandra says. “What happened? It could give us ideas.”

 

“It was before Lex used Kryptonite for our weapons,” Lena begins. “We had no way of defending our borders but to set traps…”

 

“I remember that one,” Kara interrupts, the smile suddenly disappearing from her face. “Because you crushed the legs of all our horses. We all took a tumble down the hill.”

 

Lena nods, remembering cold nights waiting anxiously for any signs of attacks. She feels Kara’s hand tremble above her own while Lena fights away the urge to rip her hand away from the woman who, for a time, led her army against her border repeatedly. Lena closes her eyes tightly before turning her palm over and holding Kara’s hand entirely against her own. She feels Kara shuddering breath on their hands before Lena resumes where she left off. “We had to dig trenches everywhere, just to slow them down.”

 

Winn’s eyes suddenly light up, chasing away the somber mood. “Yes! We can dig mines into the field here,” he says, pointing at the same point Lena showed earlier. “We’ll begin from here,” he whispers excitedly, pointing to the end of the hill and then spreads his fingers down the field. “And dig several tunnels under the field. We’ll make the beams collapse when we’ll know they will be standing just above.”

 

“Good. We’ll do that,” Lady Alexandra says, still deep in thought. Lena is grateful that the planning of the attack makes Winn and Lady Alexandra both distracted enough to be unaware of the slight rise in tension between herself and Kara, just a moment ago.

 

Lena clears her throat, smiling tentatively at the woman still holding her hand. Not letting go before looking back at Winn. “How deep will be the drop?”

 

“Not a lot unfortunately. It will only be a few tunnels, maybe three meters deep. The ground will already be shaking under their weight as soon as the Daxamites marched on the field.”

 

Lena feels Kara’s hand grip her left even more tightly as if Kara was looking for a grounding point. As if she couldn’t believe that years of war against one another led them to this, to feeling the ring on Lena’s finger and the red tread still on her wrist. “It’s good enough. How wide is the forest? Can they escape by it?” Kara asks her.

 

Lena shakes her head. “Three or four meters wide before the drop. It’s dense, lots of vegetation. It will slow their progress. I think we should go with Lady Alexandra’s clamp‘s idea – “Lena continues but is quickly interrupted.

 

“Oh, please. Alex is fine.” Alex waves nonchalantly. “You are the only one calling me that. Anyway, if we go with my idea we will have to rehearse the formation for it to work. We’ll have to be in tune as a whole unit. If one of the wings is breached, it’s over.”

 

Kara nods. “We’ll have to regroup them tightly to the center and keep them from having enough space to maneuver. Their number will play against them…” Kara trails off, her eyes running through the lines of the map. “It’s really risky. A lot of it rest on chance.”

 

Lena shrugs. “Like any battle plans.”

 

“All we have to do is make sure our formation is solid.” Alex stresses. “Otherwise no matter the traps or the layout of the terrain, it will be useless.”

 

“Alright.” Kara concedes.

 

Everyone suddenly breathes easier. The heavy tension lifting suddenly now that they all agreed on following the Alex’s plan.

 

Alex stretches loudly, a few joints cracking. “Are you going to brief James on it?”

 

Kara shakes her head. “Can you do it? It’s late. We will begin tomorrow at first light.”

 

Alex nods and leaves, Winn following closely behind. Lena waits for them to be well out of earshot before asking Kara what was trotting on her mind. “You still haven’t talked to Sir James?”

 

Kara sighs, finally letting go of her hand. “No. Have you eaten yet?”

 

“No.” She watches Kara walk toward the chest where they kept their food. Lena stretches feeling her rigid muscles groans in protest before clearing the table. She folds the map carefully before putting away. “Why didn’t you talk to him?”

 

“You were right.” Kara says while assembling the food on their plates. “He does this every time. He has to realize I’m not someone who needs to be protected. I’ve been doing well on my own for a long time.”

 

Lena nods, watching Kara curiously, wondering for the first time if she hadn’t been too quick to judge their relationship. And yet, it didn’t feel right to ask the woman who looked pained just by mentioning their dispute what the nature of their relationship was. If anything, Lena knows it is complicated. Lena suddenly remembers what she told Sir James just before leaving his office and wonders if she ought to talk about it with Kara. She knows she will but the woman looks so tired at the moment, Lena decides to let it go. At least for tonight. “So, you said you had the little cakes I liked earlier?”

 

Kara chuckles before bringing two plates with bread, dry fruits and those famous chewy little cakes with almond and peanuts around it. “Dinner is served!” She says while sitting on the chair next to her.

 

“Thank you!” Lena says before they both dig in.

 

“How was the rest of your day?” Kara asks after the first few bites.

 

Lena swallows before responding. “I spent the day with Vasquez. She makes a good Sergeant. You?” She pours water for the both of them, sliding a cup for Kara who thanks with a nod.

 

“I had a lot of meetings. Same old thing, an officer asked to change the position of his company because he wasn’t getting along with the one assigned next to him. Everyone is on edge. I think the wait is making them tired and scared.”

 

“I asked Luke to smuggle back a few kryptonite. Alex said Maggie had connections in Krypton that would speed up the process.”

 

Kara nods, chuckling softly. “She has contact everywhere.”

 

“Good to know. The Archers’ Corps will help.” Lena says pensively, chewing on her little cakes. The worry for her people coming back to the surface. “They went into hiding. Ten thousand of them, can you imagine?” Lena chuckles at the look of surprise on Kara’s face. “We dug a series of tunnels from the border to the sea, under my brother’s nose.” She explains picking at the crumbs of bread left on her plate. “It’s a real labyrinth if you are not familiar with the layout. It allows us to go from one side to another without being detected.” Lena pauses, eating the last few dry fruits, lost in thought. “I’ve been planning a mass exodus for my company and their families for a while.”

 

“And he never discovered them?” Kara asks. Lena shakes her head. “Not even an inkling?”

 

Lena let out a laugh. “No. He is way too absorbed by his own projects to pay attention at what’s happening outside.”

 

Kara presses her hands softly into hers in support. “We’ll save them.”

 

Lena thanks her with a smile. “I know.”

 

“Come on, let’s go to sleep. I’m exhausted.” Kara stands and takes their plates away.

 

Lena yawns. That's a wonderful idea, Lena thinks tiredly, rubbing her eyes. Suddenly the thought of her bed was the only thing occupying her mind. She goes behind the curtain and quickly washes herself before putting on her sleep clothes. She hears distractedly Kara wash their plate and then move a few things around in their living space. Lena frowns and steps out to see Kara preparing a bed made with a few blankets and pillows on the ground.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Kara huffs, laying extra blankets onto the ground. “I forgot that they took away my cot for the infirmary this morning.”

 

Lena scratches her head, casting a glance toward the empty part of the tent where Kara’s cot used to be. She then looks at hers and sighs, rolling her eyes at her bad luck. She promised to be friend with Kara, sharing a bed was just plain cruel. “Come on, get in. You are not going to sleep on the floor.” Lena says, slipping into her bed.

 

Kara stops, watching her curiously. “Are you sure?”

 

Lena burrows her face into her pillows and closes her eyes, already feeling the stress of the day melt away. “Just get in whenever you are ready. We are bounded forever, we might as well get used to it.”

 

She hears Kara chuckle, dumping the pillows and extra blankets on her. “Thanks Lena.”

 

Lena hums, burrowing herself greedily into the extra blankets. She blacks out for a moment before she feels Kara settle at her back, the fresh scent of mint following her. “Your feet are cold.” Lena grumbles.

 

“Sorry.” The blonde whispers sheepishly taking her feet away from her warm ones.

 

It’s a tight fit but they make it work. Unfortunately, Lena can feel that Kara isn’t sleeping. She is rigid. Her breathing is all over the place while trying to make it seem like she had it under control. Little things her tired mind can’t help but picked up on, keeping her awake. Lena groans and turns toward the blond, frowning at the blush spreading on Kara’s cheeks. “What is it, Kara?”

 

Kara exhales suddenly and turns her face toward her. Lena watches her embarrassment Shine under the soft candlelight. “I… I am a cuddler.” Kara confesses.

 

Lena blinks. “What?”

 

“I mean… That’s something I should tell you, right?” Kara asks, energy still thrumming through her veins while Lena feels bone tired. “Every time Alex and I had to share a bed, well, I woke up cuddling her. So, you know, you can absolutely push me away at anytime, and I really mean anytime.”

 

Lena watches Kara babble away, staring at the canvas of the tent, her jaw flexing every few seconds and Lena wonders not for the first time if the woman isn’t really an alien. Even for a Kryptonian, the blonde was awfully lively and buoyant. Always restless, always in movement. “If I let you hug me, will you just go to sleep?” Lena pleads, feeling at her wits end.

 

“What?”

 

“You are tense and I can hear you think. It’s distracting.”

 

“I… I can just go… I’m sure Alex…” The blonde stammers already lifting the blankets away.

 

Lena feels the cold air hitting her skin and screams inside. She feels like hitting her head against a wall. She just wants to sleep. She takes Kara’s arm and holds it around her as she faces away. “Sleep,” Lena growls closing her eyes, hell-bent on having a little sleep before Alex comes to wake them up to rehearse the Infantry’s formation tomorrow.

 

Sluggish and loose, Lena feels Kara nod against the back of her neck. Kara presses herself closer to her back and Lena sighs contently, succumbing finally to sleep as Kara’s ring rubs softly against her palm.

 

 

 


	5. V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Can I just say that you guys are the best?! I don't think I've ever written a chapter so fast. Well, it's also not as long as the others but anyway. Thank you for your comments and kudos, they really boosted me up. Warning : There's a lot of mentions of violence in this chapter... 
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy the chapter. :) Take care!

 

 

 

Lena hates being cold.

 

She feels like she’s been cold her whole life, frozen to the bones at a young age, and roaming the empty and bleak corridors of the Luthor’s castle in desperate search of warmth. She remembers running in her father’s arms, her little legs barely keeping up with her speed and eagerness, to burrow herself in the familiar scent of pine trees and smoke, the smell of campfire following him everywhere he went. She always felt better with her father at her side. She could forget for a moment that she was only a bastard child; something the Queen kept repeating over and over again, like a dirty word. She could forget the cold eyes following her everywhere she went, the indifference of the people working in the castle, following the directive of their Queen when the King was absent.

 

It doesn’t feel like a choice anymore. It’s instinctive, even primitive how her body would automatically seek out warmth like the heat of the sun hitting her skin, the boiling tea burning her tongue or the passion of writhing bodies locked into an incandescent embrace.

 

Lena feels like she’s been seeking warmth her whole life and that’s what she tells herself to justify the sudden need to move closer to Kara when she presses her cold side to the Kryptonian’s warmer one.

 

Kara looks at her, startled by the sudden movement before she smiles slightly, opening her cape for Lena to slip in. Lena sighs in relief. They have been waiting for hours, sitting on cold ground, against a cold tree, camped out in the dark forbidden to light any campfires.

 

After spending days training and rehearsing their formation, they had moved the second army in position on the hill a whole day before the Daxamites were supposed to arrive. Lena had placed her archers at the bottom of the hill, hidden behind the camouflaged pavises, asking them to hold their position no matter what. But now that the night had fallen upon them, it was highly unlikely the Daxamites would travel at night in hostile territory. Lena had to work out a rotation for them to rest while others stood guard. She had joined Kara shortly after as they both oversee the logistics of their unit from the little patch of wood between the archers and the infantry.

 

“I hate the waiting.”

 

Lena grins not surprised in the least by Kara’s statement. Kara Zor-El was a force to be reckoned with. Lena remembers watching the woman charge wholeheartedly into their first line of defense from the high walls of the Luthor’s border. Lena remembers being impressed and scared at the brute strength and determination she could read in the blonde’s actions. Destroying outposts and fortifications before she stood just under the kingdom’s last line of defense, a wall they had build over the years and fortified day after day, to stare right into Lena’s eyes with defiance burning in her blue eyes.

 

“I know.” Lena says, holding the cape closer to her, breathing into the vague scent of honey and mint. “Patience isn’t really your forte.”

 

“Don’t be mean,” Kara nudges her playfully, hiding her smile into the warm fabric. “I can be patient.”

 

Lena scoffs turning toward the Kryptonian, raising her eyebrows in disbelief. “Sure you can. It’s not like I had to save you from choking a few times because you couldn’t wait to put all the food in your mouth…”

 

“Hey!” Kara looks at her with a scowl, pulling the crimson cape back toward her. “That happened once, alright! You are wildly exaggerating.”

 

“I’m not.” Lena smirks, drawing the cape back to her and wedges it between her back and the tree.

 

Kara rolls her eyes, sighs before drawing closer to her now that Lena has most of the fabric around her. “Besides, it’s food. Why wait when it’s there?”

 

“My point, exactly. Admit it,” Lena teases playfully. “You are not patient at all.”

 

“I can be when I want to. Look!” She says wiggling her fingers before listing all the time she had shown patience. “I plan. I strategize. I attends meeting after meetings without bashing anyone’s head,” she emphasizes. “That requires a lot of patience.”

 

Lena laughs. “You are like a bull, Kara. Why do you think it took us so long to perfect Alex’s formation? You just charge straight in…” she trails off, watching Kara’s smile turn into a frown.

 

“What are you saying?” Kara whispers, looking away. “Do you want me to step down too?”

 

Lena gulps, regretting her choice of words. She finds Kara’s hand under the cape but the woman takes it away, gently, now crossing her arms. “That’s not what I’m saying,” Lena says but the blonde still isn’t looking at her, her gaze lost somewhere above the trees. Lena sighs and imitates Kara, gazing toward the patch of sky they could see between the branches and foliage. It baffles her how the Kryptonian can exude so much power and strength and not be aware of it. It baffles her to see her be so confident, and yet so insecure. It shouldn’t be possible, and yet Kara Zor-El keeps toeing that fine line every time.

 

“You are so strong,” Lena breathes solemnly, a smile suddenly appearing on her face. “I saw you tear down our Infantry like they were nothing,” Lena pauses and glances at Kara briefly before staring back at the sky, chuckling softly. “I saw you charged into traps I laid so carefully and meticulously and yet, you just breezed past them. It used to make me so mad.” Lena exhales, thrown back to the acrid smell of smoke and sweat and fear. She feels Kara’s eyes on her but she can’t bring herself to meet them. “It’s scary. To be your enemy,” she lets out quietly and feel Kara’s hand grip her hand in the sudden silence.

 

“But…” Lena trails off, gripping Kara’s left hand tightly into hers, mending the crack before it even has a chance to break. “You are not invincible, Kara. There’s a point where your body, under extreme duress, will just shut down. You’ll be like any of us.”

 

As predicted, Lena feels Kara’s hand try to break free from her hold, from her regrets. Lena lets her.

 

“How do you know this?” Kara growls, gripping her arm tightly and turning her toward her.

 

Lena confesses, not seeing any point in hiding it now. “Lex experimented on Kryptonians. That’s why we never released the prisoners to you.”

 

Kara narrows her eyes. “You knew?”

 

Lena nods.

 

“And you didn’t do anything?” Kara asks but it sounds more like an accusation to her ear than an actual question. They both know that no Kryptonian soldiers ever got out from Luthor’s Kingdom. “I might never forgive you for this.”

 

Lena shudders and nods. “We were at war,” she whispers the reason Lex told her at the time but the more she hears herself repeat it the more horrible it sounds. “I can’t forgive myself either.”

 

Lena wonders how the night led them to this. How a harmless conversation and banter came to a confession of guilt and war crimes. How her desire to seek out warmth left her so cold. Lena wonders if she will finally break under the blame of Kara’s hand still gripping her arm.

 

“I can’t remember their faces.” Kara whispers suddenly, offering a confession of her own. “I tell myself that those I managed to save outweigh those I had to kill. But…” Lena feels the hand gripping her arm finally relax and fall limply against hers, lying on the cold, hard ground between their bodies. “But sometimes, I can’t even remember their faces…”

 

Lena exhales suddenly not breaking yet and feels the ground for Kara’s annular. She rubs the warm golden ring against her fingertips, a strange habit that quickly became synonymous to comfort. Kara laces their fingers together and Lena smiles, shyly meeting Kara’s eyes in the dark. Maybe, they could break together.

 

They don’t speak for a while. They don’t really need to. The warmth of Kara’s hand in hers was enough to tell her that she wasn’t alone in her guilt. She didn’t have to walk alone in the dark anymore. Lena listens for the patrols walking around them, alerts to any kind of movements beyond the hill.

 

Lena wished Alex was here with them and not behind the hill with all the cavalry. The woman had an uncanny ability to remain calm under pressure. It particularly showed when they kept messing up the formation. Her authority was indisputable and Lena wished she could borrow a bit of Alex’s stoniness and assurance to calm the anxious feeling in her guts.

 

“After you disappeared,” Lena suddenly says a thought occurring into her brain. “Krypton got their hands on a lot of our weapons. I know they have Kryptonite arrowheads. I won’t put it past them to use it against us.”

 

“Us, uh?” Kara grins teasingly, squeezing her hand.

 

Lena shakes her head at the sudden image, smiling brightly. “Who would have believed it? An El and a Luthor working together…”

 

Kara grins happily. “I think we make a good team.” She turns fully toward her, leaning her shoulder against the tree. Lena does the same, feeling their forehead touch slightly. “You talk about my safety but you like to take risks, don’t you?” Kara asks cheekily. “Once, I saw you run toward our cavalry just to set off a trap.”

 

Lena eyes widens at this particular memory. “I had to!” They had spread a fire accelerant on wooden beams all across the field as a first line of defense but the grass had been too wet and no matter how many flammables arrows they shot, the beams wouldn’t catch fire. Lena had to run out and light it directly while Kryptonian’s cavalry had galloped toward her. “We had worked really hard on it!”

 

Kara smiles and rolls her eyes. “You tell me I’m not invincible but you have no sense of self-preservation.”

 

“I know but,” Lena sighs, worried for the kind, bubbly, larger than life Kryptonian suddenly twisting her guts. “Will you promise not to charge head first?”

 

“Depends,” Kara says looking at her pointedly. “Will you promise not to be reckless?”

 

Lena snorts. “Fair enough. Can we both promise to be careful, shake on it and leave it at that?”

 

“Sure.” Kara smiles, shaking the hand she has been holding all along.

 

“You should sleep.” Lena whispers, seeing the purple bags under Kara’s eyes.

 

“I’m not tired.” Kara says hiding the yawn suddenly invoked just by the idea of sleep.

 

“I’ll take the first round, Kara. We can’t both be tired. Tomorrow is going to be a long day.”

 

“Alright,” the blonde says quickly, taking Lena’s arm and hugging it against her. “But wake me up when it’s my turn,” she mumbles before falling asleep against her shoulder.

 

Lena watches her and doesn’t stop the soft smile from stretching across her lips. She learned pretty quickly that nightmares wouldn’t wake Kara up once she had something to hold onto while she slept. The girl slept like a log. The restless energy safely stored away for the night.

 

Ever since that first night where Kara got her cot taken away, they had voicelessly agreed that they would wait for the other to go to bed. It was awfully domestic but Lena wouldn’t read too much into it. She used to press her back against Luke when they would camp out along the border, digging trenches and setting traps. Just the feel of someone’s heat against her body was enough to quiet her mind. It was enough to chase away the lifeless eyes and darkness gripping at her ankles. Lena can’t blame Kara for wanting to find comfort in the simple act of sharing a bed.

 

There have been a few incidents, worthy of a good laugh now that Lena thinks about it. Kara drooling on her neck or spitting back a few strands of her hair. Lena kicking Kara in the ribs without meaning to or when Kara woke up, face pressed into her chest and the flustered woman couldn’t stop blushing for two days straight every time she saw her.

 

Lena smiles wide at the memory. She couldn’t help but feel drawn to Kara’s light, even in the darkest of time, even when they stood on opposite sides of the battlefield.

 

It was weird to feel so close to someone when everything around them pushed to break them apart. An El and a Luthor should never have been friends and yet, here they were defying all odds.

 

Lena watches the rotation take place and gently nudges Kara awake. The woman blinks before nodding quietly, straightening up and wordlessly putting her arms around Lena’s shoulders to press her against her side. Lena sighs contentedly against Kara’s warm neck before falling asleep.

 

 

It feels only a few seconds before Kara wakes her. It’s cold and damp. The morning dew clings to her uncomfortably. Lena stretches her arms above her head while Kara stands up, stretching her legs.

 

“Any signs of Daxam?” Lena asks tiredly.

 

Kara shakes her head. Lena stands too, shaking the leaves and dirt out of Kara’s cape.

 

“Come here,” she waits for Kara to approach and ties the cape back to her chainmail. “Can I just say that I missed seeing you on the battlefield?”

 

Kara laughs, surprised. “Were you sad?”

 

“Only because I didn’t get to show you my new Kryptonite arrows.”

 

Kara hums looking amused, a strange glint in her eyes. “Wait, are you sure it wasn’t because of my blonde hair floating in the wind? Because that was very convincing... I just had to bind myself to you after hearing that.”

 

Lena rolls her eyes, mortified and pushes her away. “Go to your infantry Captain Zor-El! See you on the battlefield!

 

“Good luck, Captain Luthor! We can’t have you distracted by my blonde hair!” Kara says loudly while walking away.

 

Lena chuckles quietly, shaking her head at Kara’s silliness. Someone clears their throat behind her and Lena turns around suddenly. Vasquez raises an eyebrow at her questioningly.

 

“I’m not distracted by her hair.” Lena says in-lieu of greetings.

 

Vasquez looks at her, amused.

 

Lena sighs, defeated. “Fine, just don’t tell anyone.”

 

“Of course not, Captain.”

 

“How is everyone?” Lena asks as they go down the hill, nodding to scouts still patrolling the area.

 

“Stressed, mostly.”

 

Lena sighs. It couldn’t be helped. “Did they get any sleep?”

 

“I got a few who threw up.”

 

Lena nods. “Better to let it all out now, to be honest. And you?”

 

Vasquez frowns. “Me? What about me, Captain?”

 

“How are you holding up?” Lena asks, stopping their walk. She observes the different emotions appearing in the woman’s eyes: the worry, the fear, the uncertainty.

 

Vasquez smiles shakily. “I’m alright, Captain. Thank you.”

 

Lena smiles, indulgently. “I have someone under my command back in Luthor’s Kingdom. Her name is Jess. I appointed her Sergeant of the crossbow squad in my company. I never saw someone shoot so fast and so precisely with a crossbow. The steadiest hands in the entire kingdom. Of course, she had years and years of training.” Lena smiles and takes Vasquez by the arm, asking silently for the woman to give her, her full attention. “But the first time she went into battle, she couldn’t nock a single bolt.”

 

Vasquez opens her mouth, at a loss, stammering something before Lena stops her.

 

“I’m not trying to scare you. All I’m saying is it’s okay to be scared.”

 

“How is she now?” Vasquez whispers.

 

“She still has the steadiest hand in the Kingdom. She just asks someone to nock the first bolt for her.”

 

Vasquez smiles looking relieved. Lena squeezes her arm in support before they both walk down to meet the archers. Some looking visibly sicker than others. Lena inspects one by one their crossbow, bolts and pavises, while giving them encouragements or just taking away their mind off the battle and the wait by a few conversations and jokes. She sees Vasquez do the same and Lena nods proudly.

 

Lena understands the fear and the anxiety. Even after ten years on the battlefield, she still feels it clawing at her chest. Vasquez doesn’t need to know that the panic never goes away. That it will become a part of her. Vasquez might feel it in the slight trembling of her hands, the jittering of her leg, in the nightmares coming up at night or in the lifeless eyes following her everywhere she goes. Vasquez doesn’t need to know that Lena still sees the smiling face of her father that day on her first battle not knowing he was fighting his last. Vasquez doesn’t need to know any of that. She just needs to know that everything is going to be alright.

 

*******

 

All in all, the wait isn’t long before Daxam walks into the field and into their line of sight. And yet, Lena feels like time has been distorted, beating along the irregular rhythm of her heart. Sometimes it decreases into a quiet lull, sometimes it sounds like a storm. Space, distance, smell, visibility all blur together. And as the quiet falls upon her Squad; Lena takes a deep breath.

 

She closes her eyes for one second. She allows herself this one second of panic, fear, helplessness and rage before chasing them all away in one exhalation.

 

Everything comes into focus. Lena picks on the pungent smell of the Daxamite’s horses, the way the soldiers walk confidently into the field, the feel of her longbow glued to her hand and the taste of blood in her mouth. Wait, Lena thinks, suddenly crouching to the ground and listening to the vibrations under their feet. Something wasn’t quite right.

 

Lena searches the procession of soldiers and cavalry to explain this long, drawn-out sound she is hearing. But she sees nothing. Lena looks for Vasquez behind the wall of pavises, before their eyes meet and Lena motions her to come to her.

 

“There’s something wrong,” Lena whispers as soon as Vasquez crouches to her level. “I think they are dragging something across the ground.

 

“I don’t see anything.”

 

“Me nei-” Lena stops abruptly, eyes wide at the three mangonels appearing before her eyes.

 

Her theory was now confirmed. Daxam intended to lay siege at the back of their army.

 

“What do we do?” Vasquez whispers, Lena hears the beginning of panic shake her voice.

 

Lena looks at her but does not really see her. They couldn’t attack with those machines on their flank. It would disrupt their formation in only a few hurl of projectiles. The Daxamites would see them coming down the hill and would just, in a matter of minutes, throw stones or fire pots at them. It would be an absolute disaster.

 

Lena breathes deeply and promptly undoes the bright red cloth tied to her biceps: the symbol of her captaincy.

 

Vasquez looks at her incredulous as Lena ties it to her sergeant’s biceps.

 

“I will take your place at the other side of the formation. You will stay here at the center. And you will, like we rehearsed, give the assault as soon as their cavalry stands on either side of our formation.” She throws a quick glance at the Daxamites’ progression and tries to calculate the time left before they had to attack.

 

“But, Captain…” The woman whispers, bringing back her attention to her.

 

“Vasquez!” Lena shakes her sergeant violently by the shoulders. She sees the woman gulps and Lena can’t let herself feel bad for her second in command. “You were at every rehearsal, every meetings, every training sessions. You know the formation by heart, I made sure of it. You know what to do!”

 

The woman nods resolutely. “Yes, Captain!”

 

Lena smiles proudly at her. Vasquez would make an excellent captain one day.

 

“Do we inform Captain Zor-El?”

 

Lena grimaces looking at the trees behind them. Kara couldn’t see the new danger they were facing. The thick foliage was partially obscuring their view of the field from where the Infantry was hiding, waiting. The Infantry counted on them to know when to begin the assault.

 

“We don’t have the time,” Lena whispers as an apology.

 

Vasquez nods and grips her arm, bringing her back to the moment. “Good luck, Captain.”

 

Lena nods, exhaling with difficulty before running with her equipments to Vasquez’s vacant position. She crouches behind the pavises, watching the troop advance before her eyes, a hand on her bow, an arrow already nocked and waits for Vasquez’s signal to draw.

 

Lena breathes deeply, feeling the weight of her full quiver at her back.

 

Suddenly, she feels the wave of archers to her left give the signal of the draw. Lena stands just two steps behind her pavises and draws the string of her bow straight toward the cavalry.

 

“RELEASE!”

 

A black cloud of bolts and arrows fly over the field, raining down on the cavalry. Lena hears the whine of hundreds of horses suddenly struck, dislodging their knights from their seat.

 

Nock, draw, release. Over and over again. Twelve arrows per minutes. That’s the most she could do. Lena watches absentmindedly the chaos reigning on the field. Soldiers falling over, screaming and clutching at their wounds.

 

Daxam’s Infantry rushes toward them. Lena shoots an arrow straight to a soldier advancing toward her before she shoots another one in the heart of another.

 

“INFANTRY!” Vasquez shouts.

 

Lena hears the thundering sounds of the infantry running behind her, storming down the hill. Lena shoots at another man’s leg before crouching behind her pavises and recharging her quiver. She pauses and smiles reassuringly at the young, terrified girl crouched next to her before Lena makes a run for the mangonels.

 

Now that Kara’s Infantry was storming to the field, Lena felt confident for the safety of her Archers, no longer openly exposed, as they continue the assault protected by their pikemen.

 

Lena suddenly feels the ground tremble under her feet and loses her balance. She hears the surprised cries of hundreds of soldiers behind her as the tunnels collapsed under the feet of their enemies. Lena doesn’t have the time to check for the scope of the damages as she sees someone throw a spear at her. She rolls to the ground before releasing an arrow into his neck, nearly decapitating them.

 

Lena resumes her run away from the battlefield, straight toward the mangonels which have stopped dead in their tracks. People were scrambling to lower the beam and loads the buckets. She only has a few minutes left.

 

The rumbling sound of Alex’s cavalry reaches her ears as she sees them gallop into the field from the corner of her eyes. Screams of rage resound in the air as the cavalry closes the trap on the Daxamites.

 

Lena is close. She releases another arrow into a man’s stomach, stopping his advance toward her. She releases successively, one, two, three, four, five arrows toward the crew pulling at the rope to bring down the beam. The imbalance suddenly throws off those pulling at the counterweight, flinging them all to the ground. Lena smiles.

 

Soldiers are now coming toward her. Lena feels blindly for the flammable arrows in her quiver that Winn made specially for her. Flammable arrows were usually hard to use due to the speed of the arrow extinguishing the flame in flight but Winn made it so that it would last, till it met its target. She promptly lights her arrow before she shoots it toward the barrels of burning tar she spotted earlier while shooting at the crew.

 

The explosion throws her off several feet into the air, her head hits the ground.

 

There’s a ringing sound in her ears as she watches one of the mangonels burn, the burning beams falling onto the screaming crew standing below. She feels someone hit her from behind. The edge of a sword grazes her arm slightly before it slides across the metal plates Winn sewed into her clothes protecting her back, abdomen and shins. Lena lets herself fall and nock, draw and release immediately an arrow into their chest. The tip of her arrow pokes out of his back.

 

She stands quickly. Nock, draw, release. Again and again until she has a clear shot of the second batch of burning tar lying next to the second mangonel, twenty meters in front of her. She takes another flammable arrow and shoots straight into it. As it explodes again, Lena takes cover behind a wooden beam that had fallen from the previous mangonel. The scent of burning flesh assaults her nostril.

 

Someone grabs her by the arm and she violently elbows them into the chin. The person falls onto the ground with blood running out of their mouth.

 

A whistling rings in her ears. Lena raises her head toward the sky and watches helplessly a fire pot fly above her head straight into the battlefield. She hears the anguished screams as it touches the ground and burns everything around it.

 

The thud sound of an arrow lodging deep into the beam next to her makes her realize that someone is shooting at her. Another one lodges itself centimeters of her cheek. Heart in her throat, Lena crawls under the burning beam. The smell of burnt hair following her. She runs toward the third mangonel, watching the crew already pulling at the rope for another loading. An arrow hits her back, bouncing off Winn’s metal plate and throws her to the ground. Lena quickly rolls away, scanning the area behind her before she nocks an arrow, draw and release it into that person thigh.

 

There’s blood running into her eyes, obscuring her view. She wipes it away rapidly, as she watches the mangonel’s crew prepared to launch another attack. Lena stay still and inhales deeply. She wills her heart to calm down as she eyes the rope holding the beam to the pulley. Immobile in the middle of the field, completely exposed, Lena releases her arrow.

 

The arrow cuts the rope neatly. The beam falls back, no longer pulled by anything. She shoots two other arrows for good measure cutting off other ropes before someone suddenly throw themselves at her and punch her to the ground.

 

Lena grunts and holds her forearms up to protect herself. A punch to the chest makes her loose her breath. She wheezes suddenly blood pouring out of her mouth. Lena lets go of her longbow to pull her dagger out of its sheath. She stabs the person in the neck and chokes slightly at the blood spraying on her face.

 

The person falls heavily on her and Lena groans in pain, gasping for breath. This is it, Lena thinks, her job is done. The three mangonels are down. She inhales desperately as the smell of grass wet with blood invades her lungs and the battle cries carried by the wind reaches her ears. Lena feels the taste of death in her mouth as it presses onto her body and stares at her with lifeless eyes.

 

Lena sees the sun looking at her from the blue sky above, golden hair suddenly appearing in her mind. A shudder runs through her body and she pushes the limp body away from her. Shaky and disoriented, she lifts her longbow off the ground and scans the area.

 

She is way behind enemies’ lines, Lena realizes, she is on the opposite side of the field. She has been fighting with the drop at her back this whole time. There’s a growl coming at her, its body lunging at hers. Lena stabs them blindly. She feels her arm shake from all the arrows she shot as her dagger slides across their chainmail harmlessly. The person doesn’t fall and keeps pushing her back, back toward the drop. Lena tries to resists. She feels the vegetation under her feet slow down their progress. An uprooted root makes them tumble to the ground and Lena meets the eyes of her attacker. A boy, as young as Eli, with a snarl deforming his face. Lena lets go of her bow and hold the dagger tightly.

 

The boy lunges towards her before blonde hair pummels into him, a sword lodged deep into his chest.

 

Lena stares, dazed as Kara looks at her with the same intensity Lena used to be so afraid of five years ago. Kara stands before her with the same steel, determination and strength shining in her eyes while someone else’s blood stains her impeccable armor. Lena smiles at the memory and flinches as arrows rain upon them.

 

She looks confusedly at the arrow lodged into her shoulder, just above her protective plate, and gaps. She raises her head and sees Kara’s eyes widens in horror. Lena feels herself fall backward into the void.

 

She doesn’t know if that’s what it feels like to fall into the arms of death; its warm hand clutching onto hers and its warm scent of honey and mint filling her senses. She  opens her eyes suddenly at the feel of a hand cradling her neck. Blonde hair billows into the wind. Not death.

 

Lena hates being cold. The wind freezes her bones as they fall down the cliff but Lena doesn’t let go. She holds on tightly, desperately to Kara’s hand.

 

Lena holds on to this warmth as a lifeline until their bodies hit the water.

 

 

 


	6. VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are awesome! :) Fun Fact: Did anyone notice that last chapter was untitled V and that it corresponds exactly to the battle formation? Because I didn't, until I had to edit it. Who knew that my lazyness would work out... Mon-El is in the chapter but I used a different spelling (M'Onel) I read on the supergirl wikia that it is plausible. It didn't make sense in my story to have him as "Mon-El."
> 
> Thank you for the support. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. :) Take care!

 

 

 

Lena was no stranger to pain.

 

She will always remember the first time she bumped her head against the leg of the Queen, after her father took her away from the bed of her dying mother, and she got struck on the cheek for it. Lena had been too stunned to cry. That day, she learned that pain could come as a surprise. Quick and loud as lightning in the sky. Lena learned to fear it and she also learned to avoid the Queen.

 

Princesses weren’t allowed to run, even the bastard ones, but Lena had this energy, this vivacity begging to be let out from her little legs as she begged Lex to go outside, to run in the grass, carefree. Lex was older, he could do anything. Lex was a real Luthor, everyone obeyed him. They would sneak outside and chase each other in the dark, only with the moon to guide them.

 

In one of these escapades, Lena fell and bruised her knee. A stone as sharp as a knife had cut through her dress and straight into her flesh. She had cried that night. Not because of the wound but because of the dress she ruined. She could already picture the scowling face of the Queen, Lex’s mother, looking at her and telling her that she was nothing, worthless. A nuisance she couldn’t wait to get rid of. That she destroyed everything she touched. Lena had cried so hard that night and all of Lex’s attempts to calm her down hadn’t work until she saw him make a cut into the leg of his trousers, scraping the culprit against his skin only to match the little wound on her knee. That night, Lena learned that pain could be shared as they both giggled and hid the evidence from the Queen.

 

Lena wasn’t made for the life in court. The fake and cold atmosphere tearing at the skin of her cheeks every time she had to smile. Make no mistake. She was good at it. All Luthor had to be perfect. Even an half one. Her kind and absentee father saw that in her. He saw her wasted potential among the stale life of the court. Lena could never thank him enough for enrolling her in her first archery competition at eight. What she didn’t know at the time and learned accidentally after years of training and climbing the rank of the Archery Corps to make her father proud, was that she was just among the new batch of recruits, trained subtly since childhood to grow the rank of his army. She had met Luke that day and Lena decided that the pain had been worth it. She learned to relish in it. She learned to focus it in the long hours she spent training. She learned to relish at the pain in the cramps of her arms, the bleeding of her fingers and the strain of her shoulders, only for the satisfaction that now, she was the best archer the kingdom ever trained.

 

She had had many injuries throughout the years, most of them caused by her own recklessness. At least, that’s what Luke would tell her every time he had to patch her up after she spent too long drawing the string of her bow or when Luke had grumbled while he had set her shoulder back in its socket after she had challenged him to a tree climb just to see who could climb the highest. Pain didn’t teach her to be careful. It taught her to be better. It taught her to try again and again until it didn’t hurt anymore.

 

Being in the army had its perks. The easy camaraderie among the recruits wasn’t something Lena ever experienced before. Besides her brother and Luke, Lena hadn’t made many friends and while she didn’t feel the need to while she was locked behind castle walls... It changed when she got thrown amidst the big laugh, the jokes and the warmth of life in camp. After hours of training, Lena learned that pain could be forgotten. If only for a few hours in the company of people who felt that pain too and were all too eager to chase it away with laugh and ale.

 

After her first battle and with her father’s death clouding her mind, Lena learned that pain could be numbed. Lady Veronica Sinclair taught her all about it. The knight in training taught her that pain could be numbed with pleasure. It could be numbed in the warm bodies laying next to them, in the greed, the fever of mouths trailing a path over her body, of fingers grabbing at heated skin. It numbed her pain and as they lost themselves into the heat around them, Lena only felt colder inside.

 

Like she is now.

 

Someone is dragging her on the ground, their arms looped around her torso holding her tightly against their chest. Lena feels her unresponsive feet catch on rocks and branches and mud and her arms lay limply at her side, sometimes bumping against their thighs. It’s weird to feel present but not really. To sway between keen awareness and a dull numbness.

 

She has had that before. Those times where she felt like she was losing her mind. Stuck in this in-between where her body is frozen but her soul is thrashing inside her head. It gets harder and harder to escape. It gets -

 

Lena gasps as she is suddenly dropped to the ground, a sudden pain flaring into her shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” A voice whispers frantically above her. “What did Winn put into your clothes? They are so heavy!” The voice puffs exhausted, falling to the ground beside her.

 

Metal plates, her mind responds. Several of them layered over the other.

 

“I have to cut through the fabric. You got an arrow sticking out of your body; most of the shaft is broken but… I can still see it.” Lena hears the sound of a blade tearing through fabric as the voice takes it off of her chest. She is cold. “I can’t believe you did that. I am so going to scream at you when you wake up… Be careful, she says. Don’t charge head first… I swear, Lena.” The voice says rising in volume. She feels the voice prods at her wound and Lena chokes helplessly. She tries to get away but the voice doesn’t let her. Lena hears the heavy clank of metal fall on the ground. Her breathing becomes shallow. Something is twisting inside her; it’s gripping at her guts. Lena tries to breathe but there’s no air anymore.

 

“No, no, no, Lena!” The voice slaps her. Lena doesn’t really feel it. It doesn’t hurt but she wished she could fight back because no one gets to slap her and not get slapped in return. But she is so, so cold.

 

“Stay with me!” Another slap. Her head moves but she doesn’t feel anything. It’s like she’ll never be warm again. “You hear me? I dragged you out of that damn river, you don’t get to-” Lena doesn’t listen because she can’t breathe. She can’t –

 

There’s something pressing against her chest. Repeatedly. A rhythm her heart stutters to follow. Lena inhales abruptly and feels something come out of her mouth. Her body is moved immediately to the side and Lena breathes again.

 

“That’s it, let it all out. You are okay,” Lena is not so sure about that. She is no stranger to pain but for the first time in a while, Lena feels scared. Terrified even at the darkness surrounding her. At the feel of her own voice echoing against the empty walls of her mind. At the cold seizing her heart, ready to crush it at any moment.

 

“It’s okay, Lena. Breathe.” Lena winces as her body is hoisted suddenly from the ground. A hand caresses her hair and leans her backward into an inferno. Lena sighs in relief and leans toward the warmth. “That’s it, just breathe with me. Just breathe.”

 

Pain wasn’t something Lena was after but pain had a way to find her. Lena learned just to roll with it. Some things were just inevitable. It makes her wonder, not for the first time, how come the odds keep on stacking against her.

 

“I have to take the arrow out.”

 

No, her mind protests from the dark. Lena growls.

 

The voice chuckles suddenly. “Here you are. I knew you wouldn’t give up.” Lena feels a hand poke somewhere on her shoulder and she whines painfully, trying to get away from the offending hand. “I know. I know. But I have to do it, Lena. Otherwise risks of infection will get higher.” The hand pokes again and Lena growls. “Stop growling. It has to be done. You already have a fever.”

 

The heat pressed against her back disappears and Lena apologizes loudly, repeatedly. She promises not to growl again if only for the heat to come back.

 

“Alright, what do I do?” A weight settles above her, trapping her legs and abdomen. “What did Alex said about arrows again?” The voice muses.

 

There are a bitch to extract, Lena responds. An arrow couldn’t just be yanked out of the body. It had to be pushed through or left in place. If left in place the voice will have to make an incision to enlarge the entry wound and remove the arrow out. All archers know that it isn’t the shaft that the wounded should be worried about. It’s the arrowhead. Yank the arrow out and the arrowhead detaches itself, gripping at the tissue, forgotten somewhere inside the body.

 

Lena saw soldiers yank arrow out of their body only to bleed out on the ground. She saw some die of horrible infections because the arrowhead was still lodged somewhere inside them. She hopes the voice knows what they are doing otherwise; she is going to be in a world lot of pain, really fast.

 

“Think, Kara. Think.” Lena gulps. That doesn’t sound so good. “Okay, here we go.”

 

Lena braces herself at the feel of a cold blade coming closer to her skin. Lena sighs in relief. The voice was on the right track. “It doesn’t look too deep,” the voice exhales loudly. “Please, forgive me.”

 

What? Wait! Her mind shouts. You’ve got to give something to numb the pain. Where’s the ale! Where’s the – That not how you do-

 

The blade cuts into her skin.

 

Lena screams.

 

Her flesh is being torn apart. Probed and spread open. It doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t hurt, she repeats over and over again. She howls and trashes against the weight, flailing her arms against it.

 

“Don’t-” The voice growls, restraining her arms against the ground with one hand while crushing the other under their knee. “Why do you always hit me when I’m trying to save your life?”

 

Lena screams, fire pouring out of her shoulder.

 

“I know it hurts.”

 

It doesn’t! Her mind retorts screaming again and again. There’s blood in her mouth invading her taste buds with that coppery taste that always makes her think of death, smoke and fear. Lena rages inside at her helplessness. Lena rages at the void surrounding her mind. She rages at the pain.

 

“It’s out! Oh, Rao! It’s out, Lena!” The voice exclaims jubilantly.

  
Lena exhales. She feels her body tremble in relief, a whimper escaping her bleeding lips. The weight above her no longer holds her body to the ground and Lena feels herself floating away, slowly.

 

“It’s okay. You get a rest. I’ll watch over you.”

 

Lena nods gratefully. She should thank her savior for not giving up on her. But her voice fails her. Lena falls into the void with these moments now locked deep into her mind.

 

Darkness swallows her. Lena forgets.

 

*******

 

The first thing Lena notices is the warmth surrounding her. It’s comfortable, safe and hers. Lena burrows herself into it and sighs contentedly.

 

There’s an uncomfortable throbbing in her shoulder and Lena wiggles her fingers to make sure they are still responsive. They are. They land on bare heated skin just behind her. A thigh maybe, with soft, unblemished skin.

 

“Are you awake?” Kara whispers into her ear, rising slightly up from her place behind her to look at her face.

 

Lena blinks, the undulating flame of a campfire dancing before her. She peeks over her shoulder and loses herself in the blonde hair and bare shoulder appearing suddenly, the rest hidden under a red cape. Lena lifts her eyes up to Kara’s blue ones and gulps at the deep frown on her face.

 

“Are we…” Lena swallows, her saliva barely relieving the dryness of her throat. “Are we naked?” She raps, eyebrows raised at Kara.

 

It doesn’t make her smile. If anything the frown on Kara’s face deepens. Blue eyes looks at her disapprovingly. “Nearly… Yes. Our clothes were wet and you kept shivering.”

 

Lena nods and turns back toward the fire, Kara’s heat still surrounding her comfortably. “I would have thought you would be embarrassed,” Lena smiles and closes her eyes. “What happened to the girl who couldn’t stop blushing because she used my chest as her pillow?”

 

“That girl saved your life. And she is too angry to be embarrassed.”

 

Lena blinks and sighs giving up her shot at levity. Kara had settled their camp in what looked like a small cave, no. More like an indentation under a rock. It’s not wide, nor does it seem deep but it traps the warmth of their small fire around their body. She sees Kara’s armor laid in a pile on the ground and hers hanging limply over a rock next to the fire, looking worse for wear.

 

A sudden chill run across her body and Lena scooches backward to steal a bit more of Kara’s warmth. “How come you are so warm?” She mumbles distractedly, her mind still a bit foggy.

 

“Your recklessness makes my blood boil, that's why.” Kara says seriously.

 

Lena burst out laughing and coughs. She wheezes at the sudden pain in her shoulder.

 

“Don't laugh,” Kara grumbles. “I really want to scream at you right now.”

 

Lena peeks over her shoulder and looks at Kara mockingly. “I feel like you already are.”

 

Kara shakes her head. “I’m not screaming. This, this is whisper screaming because I can go louder.”

 

Lena doubts that. She can’t really picture Kara screaming at someone. Even in Sir James’ office, she had seemed composed in her anger. Sure, Lena heard her voice rise in volume but even Kara’s anger had felt contained, snuffed to a little ball of energy the woman hided so perfectly inside. A little ball of energy Lena could see flash sometimes in stormy blue eyes. Lena sighs and burrows her head back into the warm arm just below her head. “Can you whisper scream at me later?” She mumbles closing her eyes. “My head is killing me…”

 

Kara huffs. “Whose fault is that?”

 

Lena bites her lips, willing herself not to rise to the bait. It only works for a second. “Alright, go ahead. Blame the injured.”

 

“That's exactly what I'm doing,” she hisses even closer to her ear.

 

Lena grits her teeth and represses the scream she feels building inside her head. If Kara was trying to make her blood boil she was fucking succeeding. “For fuck’s sakes, Kara. Let me rest…” Lena whines burrowing her head deeper and deeper into Kara’s arm in order to forget the annoying voice hissing just above her ear.

 

“Sorry, can’t do that. You deserve this. And…” Kara pauses, backing away, trying to find her words. Lena waits for the lecture. “What even happened to you? When I finally got to you, you were covered in blood!”

 

Lena grimaces, trying to remember what happened on the battlefield. “I think…” She scrunches her nose at the vague memory. “I think I stab someone in the neck.”

 

“You think?” Kara scoffs the disbelief clear in her voice.

 

Lena shrugs.

 

Kara heaves a deep sigh, her body detaching itself from Lena’s back to lay back on the ground. “Sometimes, I wonder how you are still alive.”

 

Lena chuckles, pulling the cape higher over her shoulder now that Kara’s heat no longer burned her back. “Me too, believe me.”

 

“Lucky, I grabbed you when you fell.” Kara adds softly.

 

Lena hums. Lucky, indeed. Kara Zor-El had been a curse for years, plaguing her mind with fear, anger and outrage every time she came close to invade her Kingdom, challenging her after every battle to do better, to keep trying. Lena had risen to the challenge every time with rage filling her guts. She had rivaled the Army’s strategists with her plans and the engineers with her traps. Only for the satisfaction to watch the woman fall in one of them. Years later, Lena never would have thought Kara Zor-El would turn out to be a blessing, saving her life again and again. She tries to turn around and face the blonde but the pain on her shoulder makes her wince. “What did you do to my shoulder? Did you open it with a hatchet or something?”

 

Kara huffs taking her arm back from under her head with indignation. Lena groans, her head falling back against the hard bedding of leaves and grass Kara built. “Unbelievable! You are awfully grumpy every time I save your life! First you threaten to slit my throat and now you complain about my medical expertise!"

 

“I’m not feeling very confident about your medical expertise,” Lena grumbles at the pain throbbing in her shoulder. She decides to face the fire instead and tries to find a comfortable position.

 

“You should. You are still alive, after all.”

 

Lena grins, picturing the satisfied look in Kara’s face behind her, the smug smile stretching her lips. “Barely.”

 

Kara groans. “I hate you.”

 

“Great! I do too," she retorts as the pain suddenly throbs again. Lena winces and palps the wound, neatly bandaged, with the little supplies she always carried with her.

 

She hears Kara sighs behind her before the woman pushes her hand away and leans over her. “Wait, let me see.” Lena watches her lifts the cloth slowly, peeking under. She hisses in pain as Kara probes the skin around delicately. “The skin around is a bit red. Lucky you had that poultice of barley and honey in your satchel. It reduced the infection.”

 

Lena breathes in relief as Kara puts the cloth back on, no longer poking at the skin under. “I’m always prepared,” she whispers through her teeth.

 

Kara rolls her eyes, turning away. “It balances out your recklessness!”

 

Lena groans at Kara’s criticism. The Kryptonian hid herself behind big smiles and a sunny disposition but Lena notes with aggravation that Kara certainly knows how to hold a grudge. She hears Kara puts her clothes back on behind her, the crimson cape falling softly over her back. “How long since the battle?” Lena asks somber.

 

“Two days tomorrow,” Kara responds crawling out from under the rock and goes over the fire to add a bit more wood in it. The Kryptonian scans the area warily, before sitting by the fire, examining the fine steel of her sword.

 

Lena looks at the fire crackling before her. Its heat no longer able to chase away the worry and dread inside her. “And Daxam?”

 

The Kryptonian shrugs. “Everything seemed to go like we rehearsed. The element of surprise played a lot in it. There was a bit of chaos when the mangonel shot those fire pots at us but – I think we had the upper hand.”

 

Lena frowns. “You don’t know?”

 

She watches Kara’s shoulders fall a bit, an odd mixture of guilt and regrets and anger burning in her eyes. “I… I only saw the mangonels after the second one exploded.” Kara says rubbing at the bridge of her nose, inhaling deeply. “I knew I had to leave my position when I saw you there.”

 

Lena looks at Kara, surprised that the Kryptonian left the bulk of the battle so early on. Lena only saw her when she saved her from the boy.

 

“And you were standing completely exposed, Lena!” Kara suddenly hisses with anger in her eyes. Lena gulps. Kara shakes her head at her surprised face and watches her intently. “How do you think you got the time to release those arrows of yours, relatively undisturbed?” Kara sighs looking back toward the fire. “But then I lost sight of you and next thing I know, you are fighting near the drop.”

 

Lena nods and lies on her back, her shoulder a constant reminder of what she came close to lose. She watches the light flicker and dance on the rock above her to the rhythm of the crackling fire. The only sound tearing through the sudden silence. “Thank you,” Lena breathes to the light.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me what you were up to?” Kara asks. “I could have helped.”

 

She did help her. Even though Lena didn’t know it at the time. “Do you want me to apologize?” Lena asks instead.

 

“Will you mean it?”

 

Lena stays quiet. She can’t apologize for going after the mangonels. She can’t apologize for leaving Kara in the dark. “There wasn’t time,” she whispers the same apology she told Vasquez. At the moment, it had felt like the right thing to do.

 

“You saved us,” Kara finally whispers. “But I don’t know if we won.”

 

Lena nods and accepts the cold fact as it is. Another decision that would weigh heavily on both of their mind. Impossible choices where only the outcome could decide if they had made the right or the wrong decision. The uncertainty closes slowly on her. “What do we do now?” Lena asks, looking back at Kara.

 

The blonde looks around, her eyes browsing through the forest in the dark “We’ll make our way back tomorrow. We drifted quite a bit. I’m not even sure if we are still in the Outlawed Territories.”

 

Lena nods. “Can you hand me my clothes?”

 

“Sorry, I had to cut through the fabric but the armor and coat are intact, well mostly. They’ll cover you,” Kara says apologetically, handing her tattered clothes.

 

“Don’t worry,” Lena ties the flimsy shift as tight as she can over her chest, mindful of her shoulder.

 

“You should go back to sleep,” Kara says as Lena sits by the fire, the cape around her shoulder. “I’ll stand guard.”

 

Lena shakes her head and looks at the fire intently. “I don’t want to,” she finally says. She looks at Kara briefly over the fire before losing herself back into the flames. “It feels like if I go to sleep… I might never wake up again.”

 

Kara nods, understanding shining in her eyes.

 

“Tell me a story,” Lena whispers. “What happened to you five years ago?”

 

“You don’t want to know,” Kara whispers back, gaze far away, already lost somewhere in memories. “It’s not a good story,” she says with that trademark half smile that Kara does when she wants to mask her pain.

 

Lena waits, looking at the fire, listening to its old song, like a lull in the night. They stay stock-still for awhile, watching the fire’s hypnotic dance.

 

“There's a desert in Krypton,” Kara finally whispers, somber and distant. “We call it the Phantom Zone.” Lena watches Kara rub her eyes before looking at her with eyes so empty Lena feels like she is falling into a bottomless pit.

 

“My mom was a Judicator in Krypton and she banished a lot of our own people in there. No one ever came back from the Phantom Zone.” Kara says, putting her sword down next to her. “There was always something brewing in Krypton’s political sphere. There was a side that longed to keep the status quo and one that wanted to change. Because of our biology, it had been decided that we wouldn’t merge ourselves with outsiders. Some disagreed and moved away. That’s how Daxam came to be.” Kara looks at her briefly and Lena nods, remembering Alex’s lesson.

 

“But when they realized that the strand of invulnerability was slowly disappearing from their population, they asked for an alliance between the two kingdoms. My mother was among those who were against it. For her, they were traitor to our blood.” Kara sighs and Lena doesn’t think she ever saw her look so tired and weary. Like a weight was pressing on her shoulders and the woman didn’t how to hold it any longer. How to stop her shoulders from shaking.

 

“Even though Krypton is a huge Kingdom, most of it is covered by sand,” Kara continues, her eyes still lost in the flame. “My aunt knew that Krypton wouldn’t be able to sustain itself for longer. She arranged to sign clandestinely a treaty with Daxam. She offered Kryptonians for bindings in exchange of a part of their wheat field. It worked, for awhile and then, rumors say that she also began to set her sights on the Luthor’s Kingdom. Rumors say that they signed a treaty.” Lena gulps. She never knew why her father waged a war against Krypton. She always thought it was because of their fear of Kryptonians or maybe a conquest for her father’s greed and glory. She never thought it had been that political.

 

“But something went wrong and your father waged a war against us. Astra was discovered and my mother sent her to the Phantom Zone with all her partisans.” Kara pauses and looks at her. Pain, rage and an overwhelming sense of defeat shining in her eyes. “I don’t know what went wrong between them but…” Kara shakes her head, breathing heavily. “I know that it pushed us into war. And I… I was only fourteen,” Kara roars suddenly at the unfairness of it all, at the lost innocence and helplessness. Kara captures her eyes from over the fire and Lena sees the tears the woman refuses to cry. Kara clenches her jaw and looks away. She swallows back the pain, swallows every emotions back into her and hides it away. Lena doesn’t dare make a move. Lena can’t even blink captured by the creature unfolding before her eyes. Lena watches Kara try to contain the brewing storm from destroying everything, even herself.

 

“I didn’t fight then but my mother did and when your brother attacked us, again and again, taking more and more of our people. I had to fight too,” Kara hisses through gritted teeth with tears swimming in her eyes but never falling. Lena wishes she could offer an apology but they had both been embroiled into a war they didn’t know how to end. “Every battle became more incentive for hatred and vengeance.” Kara looks at her and Lena nods. That’s what had happened to them. They had fought again and again until they didn’t know how to stop. Until it was too late to do so.

 

The crackling fire stands watch. Standing between them like the years long hatred that had fueled them on the battlefield.

 

Kara stands abruptly, a nervous energy coursing through her body, with no outlet but the pacing she does before Lena’s eyes. “I was nineteen when Astra somehow, escaped from the Phantom Zone. She captured and poisoned everyone on the Council. My mother gave me a horse and forced me to flee before she-”

 

Lena watches Kara press her fist against her closed lips and turn away from her. She is thrown back to that silly thought she had earlier about Kara not being able to scream at anyone. She had thought it was because Kara controlled her anger too well and hided her pain too easily but now Lena realizes that Kara is already too busy screaming at herself to want to scream at anyone else. Lena stands on her trembling legs and walks hesitantly toward the fretful creature pacing behind the fire.

 

Kara stops moving and watches her warily. Lena gulps, approaching slowly. Kara stands before her so rigidly, so distant and unreachable that Lena forgets the pain in her shoulder, she forget the cold suddenly rushing at her body as she opens her arms wide for Kara to slip inside the cape with her.

 

Kara does and Lena feels like they are fighting the storm together.

 

“They were chasing me and… I got lost,” Kara whispers against her neck, her hands clawing at her back desperately. “Lost in the Phantom Zone.”

 

Lena hides the wince from Kara’s grip and scratches softly at the back of Kara’s neck, encouraging her to go on.

 

“I lost my mind there. I spent days, weeks maybe years, I don't even know, wandering around. It's like… it’s like…” Kara shudders and Lena holds her even tighter. “It’s like time doesn't exist there. You see the sun and the stars but it doesn't feel real. I was alone. I was scared,” Kara whispers tearfully and Lena’s heart breaks. “I didn't have a home anymore and I didn't know where to go. Sometimes,” Kara raises her head away from her neck and exhales forcefully over her shoulder, her invincible body trembling all over. “Sometimes it's like I can still feel the sand cloaking up my throat.”

 

Lena pinches her lips together, willing her tears not to fall. They were more similar than she’d thought.

 

“I screamed the first few times,” Kara says chuckling derisively. “I screamed so hard at the sand and the emptiness that,” Lena feels Kara’s heart stutter against her chest, the rhythm irregular and violent. “I lost my voice. I don't know how I survived. Sometimes, it feels like I'm still there.” Kara clears her throat and detaches herself from her arms. Lena lets her.

 

Lena watches her rub at her cheeks before sitting back next to the fire, inviting Lena to do the same. Kara smiles softly at her before she raises her head and looks toward the stars.

 

“Sometimes it feels like I’m still stuck. I try to fix things and they keep on falling apart. I got lost in the desert and,” she pauses, holding her knees against her chest. “I don’t think I came out the same,” she confesses suddenly looking at her. Lena nods, understanding that feeling all too well. Kara looks away and frowns at the fire. “I didn’t ask for this,” Lena swallows abruptly, feeling her heart race at the sudden guilt she feels in her guts. “You see your life going one way and then, something changes, a decision is made and your whole trajectory is off-course. It’s like I can never be free.”

 

Lena bites the inside of her cheeks, hard. She feels the copper taste fill her mouth before being swallowed down her throat. She has done the same to Kara; she made a decision that had changed her whole trajectory.

 

“How did you get out?” Lena whispers.

 

Kara shrugs, looking back at her timidly. “I don’t know. I just remember whispering to myself that I had to keep going. I had to keep walking. Kal found me eventually. He and I were always a bit estranged. He’s older. He left Krypton way before I did. But beside my aunt, he is the only family I have left. He and James protected me before introducing me to the Danvers,” Kara smiles softly, lost in memories. “I wouldn’t have made it without Eliza and Alex. They are my rock, you know.”

 

Lena nods. “And James?”

 

Kara chuckles suddenly, a blush on her face. “It’s complicated.”

 

Lena swallows, deciding to watch the flame instead. “How so?”

 

“There was always something, you know,” Kara says candidly. “Some dancing around.” She feels Kara shrug against her shoulder. “But we never acted on it.”

 

Lena nods lost in the fire. “Do you regret it?”

 

“What?”

 

“Not making a move?”

 

Kara chuckles and shrugs. “Maybe. I don’t know. There will always be the question, you know. And it’s too late, anyway. I don’t have to think about it, anymore.”

 

Yes, she does. Lena closes her eyes, breathing in the scent of honey and mint still lingering on the cape. She just doesn’t know it yet.

 

“And you?” Kara nudges her uninjured shoulder playfully. “Any secrets behind your castle walls?”

 

Lena smiles sadly, heart heavy, a sudden buzzing ringing in her ears. “Maybe another time. Dawn is near; we should go soon.”

 

“Okay…” Kara trails off confused.

 

Lena stands to put on the rest of her armor, she sees Kara do the same from the corner of her eyes. She no longer has her weapons, Lena notices distractedly. She hopes Winn won’t be too mad at her when she’ll ask for another longbow.

 

They prepare for their journey back in silence. The stars have now disappeared and Kara puts out their fire. Lena gives the cape back to the blonde but Kara refuses with a shake of her head. They step out of the forest to follow the river upstream, hopping that it would lead them back to somewhere familiar. Lena knows Kara can feel the sudden tension by the furtive glances the blonde keeps throwing at her. But there’s this ringing in her ears and this pounding in her chest and Lena doesn’t know how to make it better. It feels like she is underwater and everything around her is distorted: the light, the sound, the forest surrounding her.

 

They walk in silence. Kara stands before her, tense and alerts, aware of their surroundings, sword unsheathed, ready to strike at the first sign of danger. Lena follows piteously with Kara’s warm cape wrapped around her shoulders, its scent fading away.

 

Lena bites her lips, deep in thought, thinking back at how everything came to be. She thinks of the odds that forced them to collide again and again. How through the years they had been stuck-

 

Lena chokes slightly. Kara peeks at her over her shoulder curiously and Lena waves her concern away with a slight smile. She brings the cape closer to her, pressing it against her trembling lips as they resume their walk.

 

They had been stuck with one another for years. In violence, in fear, in blood. They had been fighting a war that kept on taking and taking a bit more of their innocence, a bit more of their sanity. Lena couldn’t change that. She couldn’t change their violent history nor would she ask forgiveness for it. But she could change what was happening now.

 

Lena watches Kara’s back move in the dawning light, as if moving further and further away from her. Her mind buzzes with snippets of conversations, words and tones, coming in and out of her mind. Whispers about choices and duty. Whispers about thrust and survival. Everything blurs in her mind and Lena breathes deeply, inhaling one last time the fading scent of honey and mint before she takes the decision to put Kara back onto her trajectory. Back onto where she had been heading before Lena crashed back into her life.

 

Kara raises her head, stopping abruptly. Lena hears the sudden sound of horses galloping toward them.

 

“Run!” Kara hisses.

 

Lena does, trusting Kara to watch her back as they run back inside the darkness of the forest. Lena grits her teeth at the pain in her shoulder, spreading like fire through her whole arm. Kara pushes her against a tree as suddenly a party of ten stops meters before them, their horses breathing loudly from the chase.

 

Kara stands before her, rigid and defiant, her sword impossibly still.

 

“Kara! You alright?”

 

Kara’s whole body relaxes suddenly. “M’gann?”

 

“What’s happening?” Lena asks incredulously.

 

Kara turns toward her smiling with joy and relief. “It’s M’gann!” She insists but Lena still looks at her confusedly, heart pounding inside her chest.

 

The knight takes away their helmet. “Hey, we’ve been looking all over for you. I’m M’gann M’orzz, Captain of Mars Republic’s Cavalry.” The woman says warmly to her. Lena exhales suddenly, not realizing how tense she was.

 

“What- How-” Kara stutters.

 

“What happened on the battlefield?” Lena asks abruptly, she sees Kara nods from the corner of her eyes.

 

The knight smiles at them. “They surrendered.”

 

Lena breathes in relief, falling back against the sturdy tree as a weight lifts off of her shoulders.

 

“But it wasn’t their whole army. The bulk of it is still in Daxam, waiting.”

 

Lena nods too relieved to worry about that now.

 

“What about Krypton? Did they attack?” Kara asks.

 

“No. Not yet, at least. As soon as they surrendered we put words out there that we had Daxam’s prince as prisoners. Krypton hasn’t made a move, yet.”

 

She sees Kara relax even further, if that was possible. The worry of a second attack had been permanent when they had been planning to move against Daxam. The looming presence of Krypton had been an unpredictable threat that had made everyone at the command center lose their mind, trying to predict Krypton’s possible course of action.

 

“Wait, you captured M’Onel?” Lena asks surprised.

 

Kara turns to her. “You know him?”

 

She shrugs. “We met once when I tried to sign a Trade Treaty with them two years ago. Didn’t work out in the end.”

 

“Well, J’onn was about to interrogate him as I left.” The knight says.

 

Lena shakes her hand chuckling softly. “He’s harmless. That man just want to party. I’m surprised he was even on the battlefield to begin with.”

 

The knight nods gracefully. “Well, it’ll be easier than we first thought. J’onn was going in to break him.”

 

“Give the prince what he wants and he’ll tell you everything. He has no allegiance, only the one to himself. His father’s the one in charge.”

 

Another knight jumps wordlessly off his horse, giving the reins to Kara before riding with another knight. Lena shakes away Kara’s help as she climb on the horse, gritting her teeth at the pain. Kara joins her shortly after, their bodies pressed to each other but their mind separated by an impossible wall, not unlike the one barring Kryptonians from entering into Luthor’s Kingdom. Lena clears her throat uncomfortably.

 

“We should go,” M’gann suddenly says, watching them curiously at the sudden tension. “Alex has been going crazy ever since you both disappeared.

 

“How is she?” Kara asks from behind her and Lena waits anxiously for the answer.

 

M’gann smiles warmly at them. “She’s fine. A few bruised ribs but nothing Lady Eliza couldn’t fix.” Their horses begin to make their way out of the forest as M’gann suddenly chuckles, looking at Kara pointedly. “She had to be sedated though. She tried to escape a few times from the infirmary to come look for you. I promised to get you back to her.”

 

“Thank you,” Kara whispers softly, her warm breath hitting the back of her neck. Lena steels herself against it. She has a promise of her own to keep.

 

*******

 

They arrive at camp as the night falls. Their arrival doesn’t go unnoticed from the numerous persons suddenly stopping in their activities to cheer loudly at the sight of Kara Zor-El and Lena Luthor, two of the three Captains that led the attack against Daxam and made their victory possible.

 

Lena watches in shock as people from either side cheers them on, roars of victory resounding throughout the camp. She feels Kara’s arms holds her tighter against her and Lena doesn’t have the mind to protest this time as she watches with a lump in her throat, their faces smile widely at them, some hitting the flat of their sword against their shield.

 

She sees Vasquez, a bandage around her head, waving at her as she stands with the rest of her unit amidst the growing crowd. Lena nods and smiles shakily, overwhelmed and grateful.

 

They arrive at the Town Hall where all of Command waits for them. They jumped off the horse and Lena watches Kara be swept in Alex’s arms. Lena smiles softly as the two hold on to each other tightly. Captains and officers shakes her hand, praising her for the battle won and Lena smiles and shakes their hands in return.

 

Sir Kal-El nods at her, a small smile on his face, respect shining in his eyes and Lena nods back. Sir James does the same. He shakes her hand and keeps it in his for a few more seconds as an apology that Lena accepts wordlessly.

 

Someone suddenly throws their arms around her and Lena groans softly.

 

“Sorry!” Winn says, letting her go immediately. “I knew you weren’t dead. I mean you couldn’t be with all the protections I put into your armor. It was impossible!”

 

Lena laughs, patting his shoulder gratefully. “All thanks to you! We wouldn’t have survived and won without you.”

 

Winn beams at her. Lena looks over his shoulder and sees Kara lost in the throngs of people as Sir James holds her into his arms in relief, the both of them smiling joyously.

 

“Are you okay?” Winn asks her suddenly and brings her attention back to him.

 

“Yes, of course,” she says with a smile. Winn frowns. Lena wonders if she lost her edge. She used to be so good at pretending. “Can you… Can you help me back to my tent? I feel exhausted.”

 

“Uh, sure. But… shouldn’t you go to the infirmary?”

 

“I’ll go after. I just… I just need a break.”

 

Winn hesitates before nodding; Lena passes her uninjured arm over his shoulder before they make their way to her tent.

 

“We found your longbow back at the battlefield.” Lena nods grateful for the change of subject. “The string was loose so I fixed it.”

 

“Thank you. I was afraid I had lost it.” Lena whispers.

 

“I would have made you a new one. A better one.” He says with a smirk. Lena huffs a laugh. “Here we go! Home sweet home, Princess.” He helps her into the tent and guides her toward the table where her longbow lies peacefully, as good as new. “Told you.” He winks at her and leaves the tent promptly.

 

Lena breathes deeply. She looks around the tent and it’s like nothing had changed. Everything was where they had left them before they went to the battlefield. Lena walks around and sees the half-filled cup of water Kara always leave on the table near their bed, easy for her to reach whenever Kara woke up with a parched throat. Their mountain of blankets still crumbled on her side of the bed because Lena kept hogging them during the night.

 

Small things Lena couldn’t help but notice now that she knew things were about to change. Now that she knew Kara will go back to the life she didn’t get to live and the possibilities she didn’t get to explore.

 

She should have known better. The pain on her shoulder keeps throbbing and Lena grimaces as she takes her armor and coat away, unties her shift to examine her wound. The bandage is soaked with blood. It must have reopened when they had run back into the forest. Lena goes behind the curtain where she keeps a bit of her medicine and ointment. She pours some water into a bowl and begins to clean her wound with a cloth. She hisses in pain as the cold water touches her heated skin.

 

“Hey! I’ve been looking for you,” Kara says from the entrance of the tent. “Winn told me you were here.”

 

Lena hums, cursing Winn silently but doesn’t respond more than that. She busies herself in wiping away all the blood from her skin until there is no trace of it. Until she forgets it was there in the first place.

 

Kara’s legs suddenly come into her line of sight. “It’s already clean Lena,” Kara admonishes her, taking the cloth away from her hand.

 

Lena sighs, meeting Kara’s eyes as the blonde sits on the bench in front of her.

 

“Why aren’t you at the infirmary?” Kara looks at her curiously.

 

“It’s just a scratch.”

 

Kara rolls her eyes and applies the fresh poultice of barley and honey onto the wound before bandaging it.

 

“I had worse,” Lena whispers. She was no stranger to pain and this wound was nothing.

 

“I don’t doubt that. All done,” Kara stands and grabs a new shift. “Raise your arm. I’ll help you put your shift back on.”

 

Lena takes it away from her hands and puts it on her own, ignoring the frown on Kara’s face. “I am not weak,” Lena repeats what she had said the first time Kara offered her help, a long time ago. Before they became allies or even friends. She stands and leaves Kara behind the curtain, willing herself not to break.

 

“Why are you doing this?” Kara whispers.

 

Lena feels the blonde stand behind her but she busies herself with plates and cups and dust. Anything that would keep her from meeting Kara’s eyes. “What do you mean?”

 

“You are pushing me away.”

 

“I’m not,” Lena chuckles softly. A cheap shot at levity.

 

“Don’t lie. What is it?”

 

Lena inhales and releases a trembling breath before turning around. Kara is looking at her with confusion in her eyes, hesitant and still. As if she didn’t know what to do with herself. As if she was stuck. “You are not stuck,” Lena whispers.

 

“What?”

 

“You are not stuck,” Lena repeats. “You don’t have to be stuck with me. You still have a choice.”

 

Kara chuckles but there’s no warmth in it. “What are you talking about?”

 

Lena closes her eyes tightly, cursing Kara in her mind for making it difficult. Like she always does. On the battlefield, in this tent. Kara never gives up. It doesn’t hurt, she reminds herself suddenly. Lena is no stranger to pain and this doesn’t hurt. Lena stares at Kara’s blue eyes and state the truth Kara isn’t willing to see. “You have feelings for James.”

 

She watches Kara’s eyes widens.

 

“I saw you two kiss before the ceremony,” Lena continues. Kara doesn’t deny it, in fact, she doesn’t speak at all. She stares at her frozen. “You don’t have to be with me if you want to be with him.” Lena breathes softly, pleading Kara to understand. “It’s not too late.”

 

Kara stares at her, lost and confused and Lena wishes she would say something, anything. But Kara doesn’t and Lena sighs.

 

“We will always be friends but you have no obligations to me. I’ll give you the Kryptonite. The resistance will help me take back my kingdom. We don’t have to-” Lena waves her arm helplessly, motioning at the content of this tent. This masquerade of domesticity where Lena felt like she was at home, for the first time. Only because she knew Kara would be waiting for her. Lena bites her lips. She has been lying to herself for so long. Because this hurts. It hurts so much. Lena sees the red threads on her left wrist. The strings that bound them forever. The strings that kept Kara from being free. Lena tries to take it off.

 

“Wait, no you can’t-“ Kara says suddenly and grips Lena’s wrist in her hand, away from harm. “You can’t do that. Please…”

 

Lena doesn’t understand why Kara is resisting this. Lena doesn’t understand why Kara looks at her with pained eyes as Lena is setting her free. She rages inside but she won’t break.

 

“You are free, Kara.” Lena rages taking both of Kara’s hand into hers, trying to make her see, make her understand that she is free. “We will always be friends, I promised you that but don’t be blinded by duty,” Lena whispers fervently. Kara deserved more than that. Kara deserved to be the one in control of her life. “You always try to do the right thing. You fight and you fight but never for yourself. Duty, Kara. That’s all this is. Shouldn’t we have the freedom to choose for ourselves?”

 

“Like you chose me?” Kara asks softly, vulnerable. Her big blue eyes watching her like a stormy sea.

 

Lena exhales painfully. Kara doesn’t see it. Kara doesn’t understand. Lena clenches her jaw and sets her free. “I didn’t choose you,” she whispers drowning in Kara’s blue eyes, trying desperately to reach the shore. “I only did it to survive.”

 

It hurts, Lena shouts at the void. It hurts as Kara lets go of her hands and Lena watches her leave their tent.

 

Lena is no stranger to pain. And yet, Lena doesn’t know how to ease this one because this pain feels like the worst one yet.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest, that chapter felt like a punch to the chest. I had to take a step back and breathe after finishing it. I hope I portrayed well the reasons why Lena chose this course of action. It might be angsty now but I promise an happy ending. Thank you for reading it. Take care!


	7. VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! You are all amazing and I'm sorry I made some of you cry, scream, die a little bit or clutch at your heart in pain. I heard it was cathartic... Anyway, thank you for the support! This one is a really long one. I'm sure there are mistakes I missed but I can't see them anymore to be honest, I've read the chapter too many times.  
> I think we are all waiting for tonight's episode. :)  
> I hope you'll like this one. Thank you again. Take care!

 

 

 

Lena never put too much stock into hope.

 

She still remembers the first time she had heard of it. She had thought it had been a name. It had been her mother who had whispered it to her in that little cottage where Lena used to live. Lena still has memories of running in the long swaying grass with the sound of the ocean at her back and the warmth of the sun on her face. She still remembers this sweet feeling of being carefree and happy, lulled to sleep by her mother’s songs. Lena still remembers the joy of seeing her father come back from a long absence, stay with them for a few days before he had to leave again. It was a good and quiet life and four year old Lena hadn’t known any better.

 

That’s why when her mother, pale and tired, had whispered it for the first time in her ear, Lena had hold on to it as hard as she could with her tiny hands. She had held her mother’s cold body into her frail arms and waited patiently for Hope to come through the door and help them.

 

Hope didn’t come but her father did.

 

But Lena didn’t let go. She had tried to hold on as long as possible to her mother as her father pried her away from her cold arms and took her away from the cottage. Lena hadn’t cried. She'd stared at the door waiting for Hope to go in, at any moment, while they rode away. She had stared at that wooden door until the little cottage by the sea couldn’t be seen anymore.

 

Lena still waited for Hope to come through her door. Her young mind had entertained the idea that Hope, like her mother had said, was powerful and mighty. Her mother had promised that as long as Lena would think long and hard about Hope. Hope would come and chase away the sadness from her heart.

 

And Lena did. She thought long and hard about it, repeating its name relentlessly in her head as she lied, curled up in her hiding place, under her gigantic bed in this enormous, cold, new home. She waited in the dark, face pressed to the floor, staring till her eyelids were too heavy for the door to open and for Hope to take her in her arms.

 

Hope didn’t come but Lex, her new brother, did.

 

He would curl up beside her under her bed and whisper stories he learned. Lena would clutch at his hands and ask questions about the world. She would ask details about the trees and the sea, birds and horses, all sorts of things Lex knew about. Lena stopped waiting for Hope to come through her door. As long as Lex was lulling her to sleep with his stories, Lena didn’t feel the need for Hope to take her into her arms anymore.

 

Hope wasn’t a name Lena learned years later, nor was it a person. Hope was some intangible thing people believed in and whispered about around the warmth of a campfire.

 

Before her first battle, Lena remembers sitting around a campfire with all of the Archer's Corp. The Captain at the time had made a passionate speech about hope. Hope being that little flame inside of you that gave you strength and made you kept on fighting till the dreams you hold dear came true. He had then asked everyone to tell those around their campfire what their dream was and what they hoped for. That way, they could all hold on to it, as hard as they could, during the battle and come out victorious.

 

The person next to her was a boy her age, Marcus. Lena remembered seeing him around. He specialized in the crossbow and such Lena’s unit and his wouldn’t cross path much unless it was to go have a drink at the end of the day. Lena remembers asking herself if he could really shoot with his dark hair always falling into his eyes. Marcus had smiled at her and told her that he would like to open a bakery someday like the one in his village. That he found great comfort in the fresh and warm smell of bread permeating the air, and that one day he would hope to do the same as the line of barely awake people would trudge up through town at the smell wafting off of his kitchen.

 

Luke told her he’d like to fish, like his father who spent days in the ocean, and come back with loads of fish and sunburn on his nose and neck. He told her that maybe, unlike his father, he’ll try to go beyond the horizon and see once and for all what lay beyond. Adventures, wonderful treasures, or just more water. Luke hoped that he would get to go one day and come back to tell her all about it.

 

Lena had told them that she would wait for Luke at that little cottage by the sea, hunting in the forest for meat and fur, and that she’ll buy her bread at Marcus’ bakery. They had laughed and made plans with the rest of those around their campfire. Imagining a whole new village of their own where they would get to live in peace.

 

Before the Captain went back to his quarters, he told them that he’ll fight for hope. He’ll fight for hope and hope will give them victory. After that, he had bid them all goodnight and promised to see them again tomorrow night around another campfire.

 

The day of the battle, the Luthorian Army charged with hope in their heart and Lena watched the would-be baker get pierced through the chest by a Kryptonian spear. Lena had stared frozen at Marcus’ lifeless eyes and at the blood pooling around him. Fingers trembling. Knees wobbling. The sound of battle had been muted by the silence of their heart, no longer beating for hope but now awaiting death.

 

Her Captain had gathered the last of his battalion and told them to run. He had told them to run back to the border. Lena had watched the hope disappear from his eyes as it was suddenly replaced by an overwhelming fear and then death as a Kryptonian had run his sword through him. Lena still remembers the feel of Luke’s clammy hands in hers as they had both run away while their Captain fell. His lifeless eyes staring back at them.

 

Lena stopped waiting for hope. She found that fear was a much better motivator. Fear of death fueled her at every one of her battle. It made her do incredible things. She even defied death itself again and again against the Kryptonians standing at the wall of their border. And so, Lena raged again and again, throwing her whole body into the fear and stared back defiantly at death’s intense, blue eyes.

 

Years later, when Kara Zor-El opened the door of her cell so suddenly and saved her from a certain death- Lena let herself hope again. Just a tiny bit, like an annoying voice inside her head that she had tried to ignore. If Kara Zor-El whom she had thought dead for five years was now standing before her, more impressive and beautiful than ever, then maybe Lena could stop being afraid of death. Maybe Lena could start to hope for something more.

 

But while Kara Zor-El proved her that defying death was possible, times and times again, Lena realizes that hope is crueler than what she first thought. Hope is crueler than pain itself because hope makes her long for things Lena can’t have.

 

Hope makes her want to meet Kara’s intense, blue eyes from across the Command room as the woman stares at her with a scowl on her face. But Lena hasn’t believed in hope for a long time now. And so, she ignores it and turns her full attention on what Sir Kal is saying.

 

“It’s been a week since the battle against Daxam and yet Krypton hasn’t made a move yet,” Sir Kal pauses and meets the eyes of everyone in the room. “I think we should strike and see what they are up to. What did your spies found out?” he asks J’onn.

 

“Not much, unfortunately,” J’onn says, crossing his arms with a scowl on his face. “Ever since Daxam’s defeat, Kryptonians have been more tight lip than ever.”

 

“What about Daxam? Have they asked for anything?” Alex asks.

 

“The King is demanding the release of his son. He’ll back off if his son is returned to him unarmed.”

 

Sir Kal nods, falling against the back of his chair before looking at her straight in the eyes. “Can we trust in what he says? You dealt with the King before…”

 

Lena feels everyone turn toward her, joining Kara’s heated glare, which had been fixed somewhere around her face. Lena sighs and shakes her head. “I do think the King is truthful but I also know that Krypton have a big influence in Daxam’s court. They already backed out from an agreement I tried to make with them after being pressured by Krypton.” 

 

“Shouldn’t we trust that he values the life of his son more than war with us?” Kara cuts in, speaking for the first time since the beginning of the meeting, in a tone that is clearly meant to get a rise out of her.

 

Lena doesn't meet her eyes, feeling Kara's anger prickling her skin. “I won’t put too much stock into that. Find more leverage if you can,” she says to J’onn with a shrug. Kara glares at her from the other side of the room making Lena cross her arms over her chest.

 

She won’t break.

 

“Alright…” Sir Kal trails off with uncertainty, glancing at them with a confused frown before continuing. “While J’onn will try to find out more I want our army to be prepared. James and Kara will prepare the Infantry. I want a full report of the manpower we have, the able-bodied and the injured. Same goes for the Cavalry,” he says to M’gann and Alex. “How are your archers, Lena?”

 

“They're alright. A few sustained injuries in the battle but they're healing nicely.”

 

“Good. They’ll watch over the Daxam border. They can't fight against Krypton without Kryptonite. They’ll do little to no damage against Krypton in a open battle.”

 

“Of course,” Lena says with a smile, rolling her eyes. Internally.

 

“Kal!" Kara calls, grabbing his attention before the meeting ends. "I think I should go with Lena. The pass at the Daxam’s border can be treacherous. She’ll need more manpower.”

 

Lena meets her eyes with a frown. Kara smiles sweetly at her.

 

Sir Kal shakes his head. “All the Infantry combined is about more than six thousand people, I’ll need both you and James to handle the other Officers.”

 

Lena doesn’t hide the smile stretching on her lips at Kara’s scowling face as she frowns, looking disgruntled.

 

“Dismissed.”

 

Everyone stands and Lena makes a bee line for the door. Kara stands up, scraping her chair on the floor, intent on following her but is stopped by someone else calling for her attention. Lena uses the opportunity to leave the building.

 

She does feel bad for avoiding Kara. The woman has been trying to talk to her for the past three days but Lena wouldn’t let her. She couldn’t bear it if Kara finally decided to have a relationship with James. It was already hard enough to see them together during meetings, Lena didn’t need to have another heart to heart. Kara’s silence in the tent and what Lena said had been sufficiently clear for them to take the course of action they'd judge best for either of them. So, Lena avoided Kara... and James and Alex. Everyone who reminded her of Kara. It was the only way she could deal with it without feeling like she was losing her mind. That’s why Kara has been so aggressive with her in meetings lately. Lena knows Kara has been goading her into a fight ever since she began avoiding her.

 

It's been a week now since their talk. Kara hasn’t come back to their tent. But really, Lena wouldn’t know. It's been harder for her to sleep, and Lena barely spends time in their tent anymore. She was either at the training field with her unit or at their barracks where Lena uses their warmth to forget the cold of her tent. She saw Kara linger the first few times at their training sessions from the corner of her eyes but she never stayed long, always demanded elsewhere. Lena only goes to their tent for a change of clothes and she only goes there when she knows Kara is held somewhere else, in a meeting or at the training field with the Infantry.

 

It’s petty. She knows.

 

But Lena is really good at avoiding people. She'd had a lot of practice with her mother, sometimes Lex, and most of her lovers back at the Luthor’s Kingdom. Lena knows how to make herself small and silent enough to slip out of a room undetected. But Kara has proven herself to be persistent, more than Lena would have thought, and so Lena breathes in relief as she looks over her shoulder and sees that she isn’t followed by an angry Kryptonian.

 

She steps into the empty training field. Her unit isn't there yet and wouldn’t be for another hour at least. She decides to make the most of her newfound solitude and meditate in hope to calm the anxious feeling beating inside her. Lena puts her longbow and quiver on the ground and sits cross-legged, closing her eyes.

 

Inhales. Lena relaxes and only hears the sound of birds around her. Exhales.

 

Inhales. Lena feels her body sink into the sandy ground under her. Exhales.

 

Inhales. Lena wonders if Kara-

 

She chokes on air and coughs and grumbles. Lena stands up, frustrated, and picks up her longbow before going toward the target practice. If meditation wouldn’t quiet her mind then maybe archery would.

 

Nock, draw, release. Her arrow flies toward the target and misses the bull-eyes.

 

Lena screams. Internally.

 

She bites her lip and forces herself to relax and breathe. Lena closes her eyes again and exhales as she finds peace again.

 

Nock, draw, release. Her arrow lands five centimeters to the right of the center.

 

Lena grits her teeth and stares accusingly at her arrow.

 

She rolls her shoulders, forcing herself to relax. The pain in her shoulder awakens and throbs painfully. Lena grimaces in pain. She exhales, frustrated and nocks, draws, releases again and again. But none of her arrows touches the bull-eyes.

 

“Well, I’m disappointed,” a voice pipes up from behind her. Lena closes her eyes in frustration at not noticing the person’s presence at her back. “Now, I know the stories about you were wildly exaggerated,” the voice chuckles, making Lena turns around, eyebrows raised in surprise as Maggie smiles at her smugly. “They told me you took Daxam’s mangonels on your own and that the tide of the battle changed thanks to you but…” Maggie motions to the numerous arrows lodged messily into the target. “I’m not sure if it’s true anymore,” she finishes with a teasing smile.

 

Lena shakes her head, chuckling softly, and laughs in relief and disbelief. “When did you arrive?”

 

“Just now. Went to see my wife first but she was in a meeting with the big guys,” Maggie says and shifts her focus toward Lena’s recruits coming into the training field. “I have news for you, princess… and they aren’t so good,” she whispers, asking to talk to her in private.

 

Lena nods. “Vasquez!”

 

Her Sergeant looks up and comes running toward them. “Yes, Captain?”

 

“You’ll be in charge of the training this afternoon.”

 

“Yes, Captain!”

 

Lena motions for Maggie to follow her as she walks toward her tent, thinking distractedly that if Alex was in a meeting, Kara surely was too.

 

“What do you have for me?” Lena asks, motioning for the woman to take a seat at the table, while she fetches them two cups and some water.

 

Maggie hands her a letter once they are both seated. Lena meets Maggie’s eyes briefly before opening it.

 

LEX KNOWS. HE’S WAITING FOR YOU.

 

Lena tenses. It was Luke’s writing. To the point. As always.

 

“Your archers gave me enough Kryptonite to make weapons for the whole resistance but things began to get bad when I left.”

 

Lena stands and begins to pace. She can’t remember herself doing that. Ever. The pacing. It's odd and unsettling. It reminds her of someone and Lena hates it, and yet she can't stop. “What did he do?”

 

Maggie sighs. Lena stills and stares at her, arms crossed over her chest, steeling herself against the actions of her brother.

 

“When we first arrived Lex had put a bounty on every archer’s head,” Maggie breathes softly, calmly, as if she was afraid Lena would lash out. Lena wouldn’t of course. She's much more controlled than that. “But the civilians kept quiet. It didn’t work. As I was leaving, Lex was rounding on civilians and their families, to force the archers to come out of their hiding.”

 

Lena shudders, gritting her teeth. It was her fault, Lena thinks, Lex couldn’t get to her so he used her archers and when he couldn’t get to her archers he used their people. Tears of rage gather at the corner of her eyes and she kicks the chair away from her. It crashes against the chest where they used to keep their food. Maggie startles, looking at her in shock. Lena tries to breathe but all she sees is red. Her heart is pounding inside her head and her nails break the skin of her palms. She has to leave. Now. Her duty was to her people, first and foremost. Now that she's lived up to her side of the bargain, she can leave and save them.

 

Lena looks for her bag and begins to pack up her belongings.

 

“What are you doing?” Maggie asks bewildered.

 

“I’m leaving,” Lena hisses.

 

“I can see that.” Lena stops and glares at Maggie. She doesn't have time for her sarcasm. She doesn't have time. Period. “This is bad. I know," Maggie amends, "but you have to think about this.”

 

Lena shakes her head. She packs up her medical supplies and looks for her spare leather gloves. “It’s my fault if all of this is happening. I’ve been waiting here, doing nothing, while my people has been persecuted by my brother!” She finds them and puts them into her bag. “I have to go.” 

 

“And you will but… Can you just stop for a minute?” Maggie grabs her shoulder and forces her to look at her. “I’m not saying that you can’t but you have to be smart about this, Lena. You can’t go on your own!” She stresses, looking puzzled at Lena’s restlessness and anxiety.

 

Lena shoves her away from her. Maggie stumbles against the table. The water spills from their cups.

 

“My brother is waiting for me!” Lena roars with guilt and remorse bleeding into her voice. Maggie tightens her fist and Lena readies for a fight. She wants to fight. She wants to pummel her fist into something. Even if it's Maggie's face. Lena doesn’t care.

 

Maggie frowns and stares her down. “So is the rest of his army.” Lena fumes but Maggie doesn’t make a move. She doesn’t rise to the bait and it makes Lena angrier. “What’s happened to you?” Maggie finally asks in confusion.

 

Good question. That’s what she would like to know too. Lena bites her lip to stop it from trembling. She tries to breathe but it gets harder to get out of her mind. Lena feels herself get sucked into a void and she doesn’t know how to stop it. Kara could. Kara always knew how. Lena tries to answer but nothing comes out. There is this feeling inside her chest that keeps on building and building and Lena feels like she is in suspension until she’ll explode.

 

Maggie approaches her and lays a hand on her arm. Lena wills herself not to react, not to lash out. “You need to calm down, Lena. I know what I said is hard and you are right,” Maggie says calmly and Lena closes her eyes, trying to breathe. “Your people needs you. But they need you to be the Captain they know. They need you to be smart and level-headed.” Lena nods, breathing deeply. “I heard a lot about you. Over there... They look up to you. You are a hero.”

 

Lena chokes, the fight leaving her body as suddenly as it came. “I’m not.”

 

Maggie takes her by the shoulder and makes her sit on the table, looking at her intently. “To them you are,” she says, dimples showing. “Luke gave me this letter and I promised to give it to you. I promised to bring you back to them and I’m going to hold on to this promise, alright?”

 

“Why would you go back?”

 

Maggie shrugs. “You Luthorians aren’t so bad. You know how to stir shits up. It’s fun.” Lena laughs shakily. Maggie pats her shoulder in support. “It’s going to be okay. We will go back. But not before you go to Command and demands for the Resistance to help you.”

 

Lena nods again and squeezes Maggie's hand as an apology. “Thank you.”

 

Maggie smiles. “I’ll meet you at the training field at the end of the day. Go to command.”

 

Lena exhales forcefully, with one last smile to Maggie before she rushes to Command. She bypasses everyone and doesn’t stop at their greetings. She feels like her mind has narrowed to one single idea. Get help from the Resistance. Go back home. It was the only thing that kept her running. Lena bursts into the building and climbs the step two at a time. She opens the door of the Command Room but it is empty. Lena goes directly to Sir Kal’s office. She knocks and waits.

 

Sir Kal opens the door, a blonde woman Lena hasn’t seen before, looks at her with sudden interest from the plush chair in front of Sir Kal’s desk.

 

“Lena?” Sir Kal looks at her questioningly.

 

“I’m sorry. This is important. I need to talk to you.”

 

“Of course, please come in,” he closes the door behind her and presents her to the woman waiting for them regal and poised, watching Lena like a hawk. “Lena, this is Lady Cat Grant, President of the Outlawed Territories Council.”

 

Lena narrows her eyes, so this was the woman she had been corresponding with and who had promised her asylum in exchange of Kryptonite weapons. This was the woman Lena had to travel for through Krypton with Kryptonite weapons as a sign of good faith and got captured for it.

 

“Well, if this isn’t Princess Lena Luthor. At long last... You've kept me waiting…” she says with a smug smile.

 

“No desire of mine, I assure you. Kryptonian’s prison wasn’t that pleasant,” Lena replies with a nod.

 

Lady Cat Grant stares at her, quietly, calculating and Lena tries hard not to fidget under her gaze. “Well, I got you out, didn’t I?”

 

“You did. Thank you.”

 

Sir Kal clears his throat, interrupting their staring match. “What happened Lena?”

 

“Maggie came back,” Lena breathes. “You have your Kryptonite. I’d like to go back to my kingdom… With the help of the resistance.”

 

Kal nods, shuffling a few papers on his desk. “We thank you for the Kryptonite. But we are about to go into battle,” Lena clenches her jaw at his dismissive, condescending tone. “I understand your concern for your people and I’ll see what I can do but we will need all the able bodied to win this war.” He looks at her, a clear dismissal as Lena ever saw one.

 

She frowns, feeling Lady Cat Grant’s eyes watching her with interest from the corner of eyes, but Lena ignores her. “I kept my part of the bargain! You do your part!” She hisses angrily at his arrogance that suddenly reminds her of the General back in Krypton.

 

“I’ll see what I can do,” he repeats. Lena scoffs, Sir Kal is the general, he can order anything. He just didn’t want to involve his army in a civil war. Lena can read the doubt and lack of confidence in her in his eyes. He doesn't think she'll win against her brother. Lena reads so easily the wariness Sir Kal still feel against Luthorians. “I can’t promise anything.”

 

Lena nods, furious and yet, oddly satisfied to see that Sir Kal is as flawed as anyone else. “Fine, then I’ll take my leave. It’s been a pleasure to win that battle against Daxam for you!” Lena leaves the room and closes the door loudly. She is about to go down the stairs when a voice stops her.

 

“Wait! Come with me, Princess!” Lady Cat motions her to follow her into an empty room. Lena narrows her eyes and follows begrudgingly. “I know Kal isn’t the most open of person. It takes a lot to win his trust. But he is a general and a man. He doesn’t see what could be potential.” Lady Cat takes a seat behind a desk and looks at her intently. “If politics taught me anything it’s that you have to get what you want on your own and fight for it. I do admire you for that Lena. I’m sorry our first agreement didn’t work out.”

 

Lena nods, trying to guess the woman’s motives.

 

“That’s why I want to sign another treaty with you. A peace and trade treaty. In honor of what you did for the Outlawed Territories.”

 

Lena gasps. While Kara’s binding to her guaranteed the help of the Resistance and a pact of non-aggression against her Kingdom, a treaty with the Outlawed Territories was much better than anything she could have hoped for. It was a tangible contract binding their Kingdoms together, which would sustain her people for years. Even if she doesn’t win, even if she doesn’t survive…

 

“The odds have been against me for as long as I can remember,” Lena begins, her throat dry. “I might not be alive anymore to keep my end of that treaty,” Lena inhales and nods with trepidation and acceptance in her eyes. “I want you to address the treaty to my people, not me.”

 

“Very well,” she says with a sad smile. Lena gulps and Lady Cat searches through the drawers for paper and ink.

 

They spend most of the afternoon drafting the Treaty together. Lena asks for the Treaty to be respected even if her side doesn’t win the civil war. Because that’s what this is, Lena realizes suddenly with trembling hands. She is going to war against her brother.

 

They butt heads on certain points but they are finally able to come to a compromise. If everything goes according to plan, the Treaty will consist mainly of a partnership. A Trade Treaty between the two kingdoms. The Outlawed promises food and manpower in exchange of weapons and products of the sea. But in the case Lena doesn’t survive and her side is defeated, the Outlawed promises to act as a guardian and will provide an army for Luthorians to help them get back the control of the Kingdom until a Civilian Council is elected.

 

A copy of the Treaty is given to her and Lena shakes Lady Cat’s hand with a grateful smile. The woman who put her onto this incredible journey. Lena finally feels like her job is done.

 

She leaves Command with a heavy heart. A deep sense of duty filling her bones and her heart. It was like everything came full circle and while at the beginning Lena had fled toward freedom, she was now going back to fight for it. Lena stops in the middle of the passage, not caring in the least. She raises her head and watches the sun slowly disappear behind the fields, taking away every ounce of warmth left in her body. Lena breathes deeply, fingers trembling and goes to her tent to prepare for the journey back to Luthor’s Kingdom.

 

*******

 

Lena is so distracted she doesn’t see Kara waiting for her inside. The Kryptonian looks up at her entrance, staring at her with those angry eyes. Lena bites her lip and debates quickly if she can still turn back... Turn back and leave everything behind. Kara narrows her eyes at her fidgeting and grabs her hand, pulling her into the tent. Lena shakes Kara’s hand away, making her let go immediately.

 

“I’ve been trying to talk to you for a while but you are awfully good at avoiding people.”

 

Lena sighs, tired, as Kara blocks the exit. She takes the half-filled bag she abandoned on the ground earlier and resumes her packing.

 

“I thought you were my friend,” Kara hisses with a slight tremble in her voice.

 

“I am,” she replies softly, not meeting Kara’s eyes. She won’t break. 

 

Kara scoffs. “Doesn’t feel like it.” Lena shrugs, packing things she doesn’t really need. Her vision is blurry and she doesn’t know what she's packing anymore. She doesn’t know why Kara is so insistent or why she keeps trying to get closer. “Why won’t you talk to me?”

 

Lena tosses away a cup she certainly won’t need for the journey. Kara is hovering behind her and if Lena had any strength left, she'd tell Kara that she can’t see her and not think of something more. She can’t see Kara and stop the hope from growing inside her... and it hurts because she can’t evade the regrets and the pain. Lena can’t watch her go to James. She knows she's not being fair. She promised Kara her friendship but she can’t even do that without screwing it up. Lena wishes Kara would give her time. Lena wishes Kara would just let her go because she sees Kara and she knows she can’t.

 

“A lot has been happening and…” Lena whispers instead. “Maggie came back. My people need me.”

 

Kara chuckles mockingly. “Liar.”

 

Lena flinches.

 

“So that’s it? You are just going to leave?”

 

“What do you want me to do?” Lena replies, breathless and frustrated.

 

“Look at me!” Kara screams. Lena feels her heart stop and turns around to look at her. It’s weird and terrifying to be the cause of such anger in those stormy blue eyes. It’s weird because Lena never thought this amount of anger could be directed at her. It’s terrifying because Kara is close to tears and Lena knows it’s because of her. Lena knows she's hurting Kara. “I’m sorry,” Kara whispers, swallowing back the emotions that had sprung so suddenly. Lena wishes she wouldn’t. “I didn’t mean to scream.”

 

“Yes. You did.”

 

Kara clenches her jaws and looks away. “I told you about the Phantom Zone…” she whispers, small and vulnerable, looking at her hands as the force of her grip threatens to break the back of the chair in pieces.

 

Lena gulps. “You are not alone,” she whispers. “You have-“

 

“Then why are you leaving?” Kara interrupts her, meeting her eyes. There’s so much loneliness and pain in those blue eyes... It’s like a punch to the chest and Lena feels dizzy.

 

“-Alex, Lady Eliza, Sir Kal, James…” She continues quietly, hiding her trembling hands behind her back.

 

“And you?” Kara asks, looking at her fiercely, defiantly like she did at the door of her Kingdom, threatening to destroy everything on her path. “Do I have you?”

 

“I will always be your friend,” she repeats. Maybe if she says it enough she might convince herself of it.

 

“Well, you are making an awful friend right now,” Kara spites at her harshly.

 

Lena knows Kara is baiting her, goading her into a fight. But Lena is tired. She's tired of fighting. She's heading to another war she no longer knows if she wants to win. Lena feels like she’s been fighting her whole life to survive and she is tired of it. And so she nods.

 

It unnerves Kara even more. If anything, it intensifies the fire burning in her eyes as she closes in on Lena. “Why aren’t you fighting back?” She hisses angrily, trapping her body against the furniture behind her.

 

Lena exhales. There is no fight left. She gave it her all and now she is too tired. She doesn’t want to fight anymore. She only has enough to fight her brother. She only has enough to save her Kingdom.

 

Kara steps back, flinching at the look in her eyes. “I didn’t think you would give up.”

 

Lena shrugs. “I’m sorry I have been an awful friend. I haven’t had many but I’ll try to be better next time,” she says quietly, sidestepping the frozen Kryptonian. “Goodbye Kara.” Lena doesn’t look back. She can’t let herself do that.

 

Lena goes to the stables to get her horse. She goes to the training field where Maggie is waiting for her. She goes through the motions and doesn’t let herself think. She goes through the motions to forget the pain trying to swallow her whole. Lena raises her head toward the sky to see the stars but even the sky is cloudy. There are no stars in sight.

 

As she approaches the training field, Lena sees tons of lit torches. She squints her eyes, trying to see what’s happening but as she gets closer and closer, Lena discern the faces of the Archer’s unit she is leading, with Vasquez standing at the forefront a smile on her face. Lena recognizes the faces of soldiers who fought against Daxam alongside her. She keeps walking toward them, breathless. She gawks at the overwhelming crowd, all in their armor, ready for war, waiting for her.

 

Maggie steps toward her. “They are all volunteers. Sir Kal put the word out that you were leaving and that anyone who wishes to accompany you could. They all signed up.”

 

Lena is speechless, feeling weak in the knees. She blinks away her tears. “Thank you.”

 

Maggie squeezes her shoulder softly before Alex steps out of the shadows. Lena is now gob smacked. “What are you doing here? I thought you had to round up the cavalry with M’gann…”

 

Alex shrugs, smiling slightly. “Wherever she goes, I go,” she says putting an arm around Maggie’s waist who smiles brightly at the knight. “And Kal did say all volunteers, so as long as there is at least one Captain per company, Kal should be alright. J’onn gave us the Daxam Prince as a good luck,” she points toward the roguish man, hands tied to the reins of Alex’s horse and saluting her with a wink. “He will assure us safe passage through Daxam until we cross the border into Krypton.”

 

Lena nods. Traveling through Daxam would save them days of travelling. After Krypton, Daxam was the closest to the Luthor’s Kingdom. “There will be roughly half a day of walk between Daxam’s borders to the Luthor’s Kingdom. That part of Krypton is heavily guarded, though.”

 

Alex nods and gives her a quiver full of Kryptonite arrows as Vasquez hands her the longbow she had abandoned at the training field. “Winn gave us some of his first Kryptonite arrows. It’s the only weapons he could finish before we had to go. And Kal apologizes. I think he got chewed out by the President of the Outlawed Council,” Alex whispers and winks. “But he promised to run interferences when we will be in Krypton by beginning the assault at this side of the border.”

 

Lena smiles relieved that everything was working out so well. She was so used to fight against the odds that Lena had felt discouraged, awaiting the lifeless eyes to come and get her. But as she watches this crowd, ready to march toward her home. She feels the fight fills her veins again. “Shall we go?” Lena asks climbing on her horse.

 

Alex and Maggie do the same and shake their heads. “We are waiting for someone.” Alex says, looking past Lena.

 

The sound of a horse galloping toward them makes her turn around and Lena stares as Kara suddenly appears in her armor, the proud crest of the House of El on her chest plate, and cape and blonde hair billowing in the air. Lena gulps and looks at her questioningly.

 

Kara rolls her eyes. “I promised you your kingdom back…”

 

Lena opens her mouth to retort.

 

“Shut up,” Kara interrupts her. Steel in her eyes. “I promised you your Kingdom back, so that’s what I’m going to do. Let’s go!” Kara orders and the crowd suddenly move as one, leaving Lena one step behind, staring at them in amazement.

 

*******

 

They march for most of the night and reach the Daxamite pass into the mountain. A few Daxamites soldiers come toward them before M’Onel gives them the all-clear. It’s a relative quiet journey as the Daxamites population watch them with curiosity form their windows. M’Onel seems to enjoy the attention, Lena realizes, as he smiles and waves at his people, talking up to the women in their army and just being the man Lena saw two years ago. Genuinely cheerful and carefree. He’ll be liberated after they leave Daxam and go back to his life.

 

Alex decides to stop their march near a river. A rotation of guards is quickly worked out and campfires are lit. Lena sits at one of them with Vasquez beside her.

 

“Captain?”

 

Lena hums, distracted by the dancing flames.

 

“I would like to be a part of your company, back in Luthor’s Kingdom,” Lena stares at her in surprise. “I want to learn more about archery. I hope to be as good as your Crossbow Sergeant and maybe go back home to teach it in the Outlawed.”

 

Lena sees the hope in Vasquez’s eyes. Something she hasn’t seen or has been blind to for a long time. Lena bites her lips. While a part of her wants to tell her Sergeant that hope is cruel, another part of her doesn’t want to crush that light from the woman’s eyes. Lena suddenly wants to believe in her sergeant’s hope too. Lena nods at Vasquez and takes the silent vow to make it come true. To try and fight for hope as her Captain did ten years ago.

 

Vasquez smiles and leaves their fire. Lena watches her go, confused before Alex takes her place, a red cape in her hands.

 

“Kara told me to give you this,” Alex says handing her the cape. “Because you get easily cold apparently.”

 

Lena blushes and takes the warm cape into her hands. She is about to protest but she is cold and so, she puts it around her shoulders, breathing in the comforting scent of honey and mint. They both stare at the fire in silence and Lena waits for what Alex wants to say but doesn’t seem to know how to.

 

“Do you remember what I told you about hurting my sister?” The knight whispers suddenly, now looking at her.

 

Lena meets her eyes and nods. “Are you here to kill me then?”

 

Alex puffs a laugh and shakes her head. “There's no point in kicking someone who is already down. It takes all the satisfaction away from it.”

 

Lena sighs, holding onto the cape. “You told me I took away her choice. I gave it back to her,” Lena whispers feeling a vein tick at the corner of her eyes, annoyed at the light in Alex’s eyes, as if the knight knew something Lena was too stupid to figure out. “Shouldn't you be happy about it?”

 

“You don’t get it, do you?” Lena narrows her eyes and waits for Alex to elaborates. The knight does so with a sigh. “My sister has been cuddling me every night for the past week…” Alex says as if it explained everything.

 

As if Lena ought to understand something from it. Lena doesn’t. Lena doesn’t want to. And so, Lena stays silent.

 

“So you'll just accept whatever she chooses?”

 

Lena looks away, staring back at the fire. “Her choice is hers.”

 

“Even if she chooses you?”

 

Lena bites her lips so that they don’t tremble from the cold. It’s the only way Lena can explain this shaking that takes over her body. Lena is just cold, that’s why. Hope has nothing to do with it. Hope never came for her. Not for her mother, not for her father or the comrades she lost. Lena had waited so long for it that it can’t exist. Not for her.

 

Alex stands. “I thought you were a fighter, Luthor. Prove me right, damnit!” She hisses and leaves toward another campfire, surely to join Maggie and Kara.

 

Lena is alone, finally and she stares at the hypnotic fire. She is a fighter. She has fought to survive all her life. But Alex doesn’t know that. Alex doesn’t know that fighting never gave Lena any rewards, only the chance to live another day to fight again and again. Until it took away all of her strength. Lena feels Kara’s eyes on her but she doesn’t meet them instead she suddenly inhales the scent of honey and mint from that red cape and closes her eyes. Lena doesn’t let herself hope but she forgets about the cold.

 

They have been traveling for two days and the fields of Daxam never cease to amaze her. Golden wheat fields swaying in the wind and glowing under the sun. Lena looks at Kara riding a bit ahead of her and wonders. That’s what happens with hope. It’s like a plant. Ever since Alex planted the seed in her mind. Lena can't stop it from growing inside her.

 

They don’t talk but Lena stops avoiding her. She meets Kara’s eyes with a slight smile every time she feels the blonde looking at her. Lena doesn’t know what this is, yet. Lena doesn’t want to know in fear it might disappear as soon as she holds on to it.

 

They stop for the night and this time it’s Kara who nearly dumps her cape onto her shoulders as she trembles from the cold. Tomorrow they will arrive in Krypton and M’Onel will be freed. Tonight might be their last night of calm.

 

They don’t talk for a while. They stay in silence looking at the fire. Lena grips at the cape around her shoulders and burrows her nose into it. She feels silly breathing in the scent of the cape when the source is so close to her. When she could burrow her nose into the crook of Kara’s throat and breathe her in.

 

“I don’t want to be with James,” Kara finally says early in the morning, looking at her. Lena sees that Kara is tired, from the lack of sleep, the stress…

 

Lena tries to talk but Kara shakes her head.

 

“Don’t, let me finish please.” Lena nods and Kara exhales. “When you asked me about him… I didn’t know… you… I didn’t understand. But I do now.” Lena gulps, her heart pounding against her chest, staring at this beautiful woman who kept stealing her breath away. “Thank you for giving me the time to think about it. James and I talked. A real talk. And while he is dear to me,” Kara rubs the bridge of her noise, inhaling deeply. “I don’t want to be… with him. We… we did kiss… before the ceremony. It’s true. I don’t regret it but I don’t want more from it, either. I’m… I’m fine with it. I don’t… I don’t want him,” Kara stutters fast and gazes into her eyes, pleading her to understand what she is trying to say.

 

Lena breathes. She understands what Kara is saying but she can’t break. If she breaks, Lena feels there won’t be any going back for her. If Kara breaks her, she might never be able to bounce back again. “You should still be free to choose. You’ll choose someone else.”

 

Kara chuckles. “What if I don’t want someone else?”

 

“Kara…” Lena trails off hesitantly as she feels the weight of the red threads still attached to her wrist and the warmth of her ring on her finger.

 

“You really don’t see it do you?”

 

“What?” Lena asks. She couldn’t bear to take them off, not after Kara had looked at her with heartbreak in her eyes as she was about to tear the red threads away.

 

“How good you are?” Kara whispers fiercely. “You think you are cold and broken but it’s not true. We are all here because of you. We are all here because we believe in you. Why can’t you see that?”

 

Lena feels a lump in her throat and stares intently at the fire. The few tears slowly rolling on her cheeks are only a byproduct of the brightness of the fire. Lena isn’t crying as she feels hope grow more and more inside her. She feels like it will crack the walls she spent so many years building and fortifying. As if Nature was slowly cracking its foundation from within with roots and vegetation. “You don’t want me Kara. Not like that. I trust you now and I’m grateful to be your friend but-”

 

“You are wrong,” Kara says with steel in her voice.

 

Don’t break, don’t break, Lena repeats to herself. “About what?”

 

“We were never friends.”

 

Lena gasps and shudders painfully.

 

“We were always something more.”

 

Her walls crack. Her stones crumble.

 

“You might not see it but I do. I see you, Lena. And I know when you are lying.” Kara says smiling. She takes her hands in hers so delicately, Lena feels herself shatter under the pressure.

 

Dawn is coming and people stirs around them. Lena suddenly feels the first ray of light onto her face.

 

“And I can be patient,” Kara continues, squeezing her hands. “Because I’ll wait. I’ll wait for you to see it too.”

 

Everyone begin to put their bedding away as the sun rises. There is anxiousness in the air as they prepare for the journey into Krypton. Kara squeezes her hands one last time before she goes to her horse and makes sure that everyone is ready. Lena is dazed as she watches everything unfold before her eyes.

 

They leave Daxam. The Prince waves them goodbye as they enter into Krypton. Lena knows she should be focused on her surroundings but she can’t help but watch Kara’s back with a slight smile. The realization of what Kara confessed earlier in the day only dawns on more and more as the day progresses. They note that the border is not as guarded as it was before. And Lena understands that Sir Kal’s diversion must be working better than they had thought. They traverse the sand, alerts and exposed before they relax slightly at the looming presence of the Luthorian border.

 

Night falls and Lena guides them to a nearby forest just before the wall. She tells them to wait as she goes to investigate the entry of a tunnel her company dug from under the border. But Kara rolls her eyes and follows her anyway, a hand gripping her sword.

 

Lena nocks and draws an arrow as they go into the dark tunnel. Kara lights a torch and there are suddenly ten crossbows pointed at them.

 

Lena smiles. “Hey Jess. Is that a way to greet your Captain?”

 

She watches the eyes of her Sergeant widens before the woman puts her weapon down and takes her into her arms. “Lena!”

 

As soon as her name resounds in the tunnel, Lena witnesses utter chaos as she is swept into the arms of many and feels pats on her back. Luke stands in front of her with a big smile and Lena takes him into her arms, breathing him in. She squeezes him as hard as she can while listening distractedly as the rest of the Resistance come into the tunnels.

 

“Where is Eli?” Lena asks, looking for the young, smug face among the crowd.

 

Their faces falls.

 

“His mother has been captured two days ago. He gave himself up in exchange,” Luke replies somber.

 

Lena nods. “Is he…” Lena tries to ask but can’t.

 

“No. Not yet,” Luke whispers. “Lex has been waiting for you.”

 

Lena shudders. The crowd disperses into different tunnels. Maggie, Alex and others officers arrange and accommodate for the new arrival. While digging the tunnels, they had also created little rooms and sleeping areas everywhere. The tunnels were perfectly livable for a short period of time. All they needed was food and they could stay hidden in here nearly indefinitely. Luke guides her and Kara toward a room, followed closely by Jess.

 

"Has he killed anyone yet?" Lena asks.

 

“Archer's mostly."

 

"How long before Eli-" Lena gulps with dread.

 

"In two days. He annouced it," Jess whispers.

 

Lena nods biting her lips.

 

"What do we do?” Luke asks.

 

“We make a plan. All of us,” Kara says fiercely, chasing the feeling of helplessness and fear that had suddenly overtaken them. Lena nods, grateful for the warmth pressing against her back.

 

“They are held in the dungeon under the castle,” Jess tells Kara. “We can’t get them out without being spotted by the guards.”

 

“There is no way in. We tried,” Luke whispers.

 

Lena nods. She knows the castle by heart. There is no way they can get in undetected. Especially if the security has been reinforced. There were no secrets entries that Lex didn’t know about. He had been the one to show them to her after all. Lena listens to them debate about possible entries and diversions but she knows what is the fastest way to get them all out. She sighs and looks at Kara, a silent apology in her eyes. The blonde stops and stares at her warily.

 

“Lena…” Kara trails off warningly.

 

“If we can't get in, we make Lex bring them out in the open,” Lena says confidently at her Lieutenant and Sergeant, ignoring Kara’s groans at her side. “I’ll pretend to give myself up in exchange of all of them.”

 

Luke and Jess nods somberly.

 

“Oh Rao! I knew it! Why are you… why…?” Kara erupts suddenly besides her looking like she either wants to bash her head or lock her up somewhere far away. “I really want to kill you right now,” Kara hisses through her teeth. “But that will defeat the purpose of me trying to keep you alive!”

 

“What?” Luke asks, bewildered by Kara’s outburst. “What did she do?”

 

“She went after three mangonels on her own, with no back up in the middle of a battle. Got an arrow into her shoulder and fell off a cliff,” Kara lists eager for them to agree with her. But Lena knows them better. “I had to dive after her!”

 

“What really?” Jess looks at her, definitely impressed.

 

Luke whistles. “Damn that must have been fun…”

 

Kara glares at them.

 

“Or really, really dangerous?” Luke continues with a frown.

 

Jess coughs into her hand, looking at Kara from the corner of her eyes. “Not good, Captain.”

 

Lena rolls her eyes. “Time is against us. Lex won’t stop until he has me.”

 

“Then we’ll make time… We still have one day to plan,” Kara insists.

 

Lena hums pensively. Scenarios and tactics appearing suddenly in her mind. “Listen, I know I can make my brother talk. I’ll stall him. Keep him in the open. It will give you the chance to neutralize the guards around the castle quietly. Get everyone out… ”

 

“Don't Lena," Kara stops her with a hand on her arm. Lena stops but she knows she is right. "We'll talk about your plan tomorrow. How many are in his army?” Kara asks.

 

“More than fifty thousands,” Jess replies. “But they aren’t all in the City. Most of them are now posted at the border now that we left. While they do not agree with King Lex, they can’t leave either.”

 

“Some have been helping us,” Luke continues. “We might be able to sway some more toward us.”

 

"Great, let's focus on them first and then we'll talk about giving Lena up," Kara looks at her pointedly.

 

Lena rolls her eyes. “Have words spread around to the civilians and the army. Tell them to stand down or they will be caught in the crossfire. Make sure that it doesn’t go to Lady Veronica or Sir John Corben’s ears.”

 

They both nod.

 

“Jess I need you to find a woman named Susan Vasquez. I appointed her Sergeant of the squad I led back in the Outlawed. She is good with a crossbow.”

 

Jess nods and leaves the room.

 

“Luke, you'll brief the others officers, Maggie and Alex. We will reconvene at dawn and talk more about our plan,” Lena whispers and Luke squeezes her hand one last time before leaving the room too.

 

Kara stands by her side in silence as Lena breathes deeply, steeling herself for the battle to come. "You know that my plan will work, right? It will save everyone. We don't stand a chance if we fight in the castle. It's a maze. We would be trapped."

 

Kara nods. "It doesn't hurt to look at all the possibilities, Lena." Lena sighs and agrees. Kara nudges her shoulder against hers. “We really can’t catch a break, do we?”

 

Lena laughs. “No. We really can’t,” Lena turns toward Kara, drinking her in. “You’ll have to be careful. Every weapons here have Kryptonite in them,” Kara nods. Lena bites her lip and steps closer until she can burrow her head in the crook of Kara’s throat. Lena feels like she can finally breathe. “So you know, don’t charge head first.”

 

Kara chuckles and puts her arms around her, relaxing into her.

 

“You are not telling me not to be reckless,” Lena asks stepping away slightly to look at Kara’s face.

 

The blonde shrugs and smiles. “What’s the point? I know you’ll be. This plan of yours is completely reckless but…” Kara pauses and brings Lena’s back against her. She nuzzles her ear softly. “I’ll watch your back. Always.”

 

Lena nods feeling goosebumps all over her skin. “Come on. There are only a few hours left before dawn and I'm tired,” she takes Kara’s hand and guides her around the mass of people still lingering in the tunnels to another little room. There is a small cot against the wall and Lena holds Kara’s hand in hers rejoicing at the warmth she missed. Lena had been blind for so long, she had refused to see what Kara had tried to say in fear of being hurt. She had missed the signs, the longing she now could clearly see shining in her bright blue eyes.

 

“I’m sorry for-“

 

Kara shakes her head. “Don’t apologize,” Kara whispers and looks toward the cot. “Can we sleep? I haven’t slept well since our fight,” Kara confesses. Lena sees the purple bags under her blue eyes and nods. They take their armor off and climb onto the cot in their shifts and trousers. Kara lays her cape over them.

 

The blonde takes her in her arms, cuddling into her and Lena chuckles. “Alex told me you cuddled with her every night.”

 

Kara hums. “It not the same anymore,” she mumbles against her shoulder, pressing her body as close as possible against hers.

 

Lena nods, clutching at Kara’s arms against her chest and holds onto her hand. “Thank you for believing in me,” she whispers softly.

 

“I knew you wouldn’t give up,” Kara replies.

 

Lena smiles contentedly and rubs the golden ring on Kara’s finger. She breathes deeply. Kara’s lips nuzzle up against the back of her neck and Lena closes her eyes. Sleep finally claims the both of them.

 

Maybe hope wasn’t so bad after all.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did you like this chapter's ending? I hope it mended your heart a little bit from the last one. I have to say that next chapter will be the last one. As I wrote Chapter 6, I knew I wouldn't be able to sustain the drama without losing steam or a bit of edge. I think it wouldn't be fair to anyone to drag a story into drama after drama if I lost sight of my endgoal. (Does that make sense?)  
> I haven't written it yet, but I'll try to make the last chapter a nice end to the story.  
> Thank you again for all the support. It's a joy to write for you! Take care!


	8. VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I freaking did it, guys!! I feel super sad and relieved and excited all at the same time. I might have tears in my eyes but you won't know for sure. ;) I thank you for the support you gave me all throughout the story. It really kept me writing and be motivated. THANK YOU! I wrote the chapter listening to the main theme of Interstellar so I apologize if I lost myself a bit with hyperboles and illusions of grandeur... 
> 
> WARNING: For sexual contents and lots of violence. I'm sorry for any mistakes I made. I can't proofread the chapter anymore without wanting to pull my hair out... ;)
> 
> I hope you will like the ending! Happy reading! :)

 

 

_Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Dylan Thomas_

 

 

 

Isn’t it weird, Lena recalls chuckling softly, how the odds used to keep on stacking against her?

 

Lena never asked to be a Luthor. She never felt like she was one in the first place. And yet, here she is, hiding, plotting under her own kingdom and listening to her Lieutenant and Sergeant argue with the heads of the Resistance about the best way to take control of her city. She observes with interest these people she came to trust and care about. They stand, all crammed into this small space filled with this damp earthy smell and the bitter scent of their sweat, as they fight passionately about strategy and vantage points while pointing incessantly at the map of her city. Lena hides her amused smile into her hand. Not Luthor enough in her family’s eyes but enough for all these people to fight with her, for her and her kingdom.

 

It is not something she would have thought possible just a month ago.

 

Just a month ago, she had been chained to a wall alone, dirty and hopeless; silently awaiting death to take her. And while it had been her situation a month ago, Lena had felt that way her whole life. She always saw herself more like an animal, forced into a cage, clawing and thrashing against the bars of her cell and yet feeling utterly helpless. Living in wait of death.

 

Her father, even secretive and questionable as he was, had tried to instill in her this will to survive. To fight no matter what. Lena hadn’t understood then what he was asking of her.

 

She had been arrogant and naïve. Fighting was all she ever did. She had scrambled for every scrap of pride, warmth, recognition and preservation she could reach. And it had been enough for years. Until death had come to her door and Lena hadn’t know how to fight anymore. She stopped fighting because hadn’t believe she could have something more. _Rage, Rage against the dying of the light,_ he would whisper to her. Lena had thought that he meant to rage against the dark and the pain, to rage against life because life was cruel and sly. But now, looking at these people arguing, fighting passionately, Lena finally understands. Lena finally embraces it.

 

She finally embraces everything she fought so hard against. The pain she feels in her guts, the fear clawing at her insides and the rage burning in her heart. It’s there and Lena doesn’t fight it anymore. _Rage, Rage against the dying of the light_ , he would whisper. Her father died and Lena only saw death when he was asking her to fight for the light. To hold on to the light even in her last breath.

 

She had been so consumed by the lifeless eyes following her that she forgot that hers weren’t. They won’t stop following her and they won’t stop from haunting her mind but instead of fighting against them, she’ll fight for those eyes raging over maps and battle formation.

 

Lena looks at them and she doesn’t see death anymore. She looks at them and she sees hope.

 

She feels Kara rub her nose against her ear and bring her back to the room. Lena smiles and breathes. Kara Zor-El is fight personified. Kara Zor-El defies death on a daily basis, not out of fear but for the love and the hope of those around her.

 

“Are you okay?” She asks quietly, her lips touching the skin of her ear.

 

Lena turns toward her and inhales, filling her lungs with the faint smell of honey and mint. She nods and the Kryptonian smiles at her. Lena sighs and decides to focus back on the conversation. Jess is pointing at a few spots on the map, describing the weakest parts of the City’s defenses. Unfortunately, there aren’t many.

 

“We won’t be able to get in undetected,” Alex frowns at the map, looking for answers. “If we can’t even breach the outer wall, going into the Castle is crazy… Those who would get in, would be trapped and vastly outnumbered.”

 

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you,” Luke replies, rubbing at the back of his head in frustration. “It is a fortress. Getting in is hard enough but try getting out. It’s even harder. We have tried to save some archers before their execution and we just couldn’t get out of the City without nearly getting ourselves killed. Once in, we are trapped, ” Luke emphasizes, voice strained and tired. “And even if we do enter, archers are wildly at a disadvantage. It’s a closed space and we would face an infantry who is fucking good at melee and closed combats. To get in the City like this is not possible,” Luke glares at Alex who glares right back.

 

They have been butting heads ever since the beginning of the meeting. Lena muffles a grunt into Kara’s shoulder. It’s been two hours already. They’ve been pouring over maps and castle’s plans over and over again trying to find a way to invade the City and so far, no one could agree on anything. Lena had kept quiet for the most part, waiting for them to realize that it wasn’t possible. But Kara had asked her to consider all possibilities. So that’s what Lena is doing; even though it bores her to death.

 

Kara chuckles and rolls her eyes at her. “What do you say Maggie?” She asks, interrupting the glaring match. “You are a spy. How would you get in?”

 

The woman puts her hands on her hips, sighing heavily. “The defenses are really good. There is no way we can have the upper hand if we do a textbook invasion. The only way would be to blend in. While it is risky with the check in at the Gate, I don’t think invading the City by force will be advantageous. We need a decoy.”

 

Luke looks smugly at Alex, now that Maggie’s input has finally proven his point. Lena rolls her eyes at his bravado. No wonder Alex knocked him out the first chance she got. Lena feels smug too but unlike her Lieutenant, she hides it better.

 

“I had an idea,” Lena finally says looking at everyone around the table. She feels Kara tense beside her, her arms crossed over her chest. “We’ve talked a bit about it last night but Kara wasn’t onboard with it.”

 

“Because it’s reckless,” Kara snorts.

 

Lena ignores her. “I will give myself up,” Lena says to the surprise of the Resistance. “The execution Lex is planning for-“Her fingers tremble suddenly, a nervous tic that she has learned to ignore. Quite ironic for an archer to know that their fingers respond to emotional stress when they ought to be still and impassive. Kara takes her hand in hers and Lena smiles gratefully, hiding the trembling in her warm hand. “The execution he is planning tomorrow will get as public as it can get if I trade myself for their life. Lex won’t pass up an occasion to put his victory on display.”

 

Alex frowns at the idea. “Alone? How would you to do that?”

 

Lena shakes her head. “I’ll need some people with me to go back to the border and surrender. It will delay the execution. As soon as the word will reach my brother, he will make a spectacle of my surrender. I’m sure he’ll want to parade me through the City for everyone to see.”

 

Maggie hums, looking more and more onboard with her idea. “That would be our chance to get in. They’ll likely let everyone around come assist to this…”

 

Kara sighs besides her and caves in. “What about weapons?”

 

“We’ve already smuggled weapons into the City a few weeks ago just in case,” Jess replies. “Hidden by civilians and in some other spots. There should be enough for all of us.”

 

“It doesn’t change the fact that we are still outnumbered by those inside,” Kara scowls. “How will we get to you after the prisoners have been liberated?” She asks her and Lena smiles sheepishly. Kara narrows her eyes, squeezing her hand reproachfully. “You have no idea, don’t you?”

 

Lena shrugs. “It’s usually the time where I improvise.”

 

“Unbelievable.”

 

“I might have an idea,” Jess cuts in saving her from Kara possibly murdering her. “I have a friend in the Infantry. He is at the border right now.” Luke raises an eyebrow at her, a teasing smile stretching his lips. “A friend, Luke!” Jess insists, rolling her eyes. “Anyway, I can ask him to be the one to get you inside the City. We begin the attack and he’ll get you out of the shackles in the confusion.”

 

“Is he trustworthy?” Luke asks more serious than he has been a moment ago.

 

“He is.”

 

“We would still be outnumbered,” Kara groans, rubbing her forehead. “Did you get any word back from the army on how many would stand down or join us?”

 

“I’ve been trying to start an uprising at the border so that they can join but from what they told me even there the loyalty to the King is split nearly equally. They can’t leave and make their sergeants suspicious. King Lex would know immediately. The only thing they can do is stop anyone from sending back-up. I don’t know for those already in the City,” Jess shrugs. “It was too risky to ask.”

 

“Then they are all foes,” Alex declares. “How many are they?”

 

“The Infantry, Cavalry and the Guards all in the City combined?” Jess lists and grimaces. “I’d say a good fifteen thousand…”

 

Kara shakes her head. “It’s too much. We can’t take control of the City with that many against us. We barely reach eleven thousand and most of us are archery trained…”

 

Luke nods. “Like I said, archers are at a disadvantage in closed combat. The City is huge but it is cramped. We need to deal with the Cavalry first. The Archer’s Corp can easily overpower them. If we go inside, we will get stopped by Corben’s Infantry in no time while Sinclair’s Cavalry will be picking us off from behind.”

 

Alex steps toward him, narrowing her eyes threateningly. “You want to attack from outside the walls? You’ll cut our force in two with no back-up for either of us!”

 

Luke steps forward too, rising to the challenge. “We can’t let the Cavalry inside the walls either!” Lena throws a glance at Jess who nods and stands at Luke’s back, ready to haul him away.

 

“Is there any way for you to get to higher grounds?” Maggie cuts in. “Take control of the City walls, perhaps?”

 

Luke frowns ready to retort before Lena glares at him and he closes his mouth to think about it. “We could hold off the Cavalry if we take control of the ramparts,” he finally says scratching the stubble on his cheek. “But we will be under attack on two fronts and those inside will be on their own.”

 

Alex scoffs. “From what I understand you wouldn’t be effective inside anyway…”

 

“Hey now!” Luke exclaims glaring at the Knight and Jess quickly grabs his arms and pushes him behind her against the wall.

 

Lena sighs. At a young age, she had resigned herself to the fact that her life was out of her control. Like a piece on a chessboard, she had been thrown into a game and forced to play only for the chance to stay alive. She watches her Lieutenant push Jess’ arm away with an angry scowl. He looks at her and Lena sees how tired, haggard and angry he is, the stress finally getting to him. Lena hangs on to Kara’s hand.

 

“Calm down!” Lena hisses as he stands next to her with the energy of a caged animal about to die. “It is suicide for our Infantry if we send them alone against Corben’s and the Queen Mother’s Guard. There is just no way anyone would survive,” Lena finally says, rejecting Luke’s idea of dividing Lex’s Army by having the archers attacking from the outside. Luke nods, breathing deeply. “You will lead the Longbow Squad to take control of the rampart. The key position is the console that controls the gate. It is our only way to prevent the Cavalry from getting in. You will be under attack from both the Infantry and the Cavalry… But you’ll have to keep the gate closed for as long as possible…” Luke nods, clenching his jaw. Lena sighs and meets Jess’ eyes from across the room. “The Crossbow Squad will have to go in and watch the rear of our Infantry. You will have to fend off the rest of Corben’s Infantry from sending back up to the Queen Mother’s Guard at the Castle…”

 

Jess stares at her, shocked and hopeless. “We will be sitting duck, at the heart of the City…”

 

“I know…” War was like a game of chess and Lena learned the rules. She learned how to anticipate her opponent’s moves and she learned to make sacrifices in order to win. “Until we capture the King.”

 

Kara squeezes her hand in support. “If it only comes down to numbers, we can’t win.”

 

“If we capture Lex, there is nothing they can do,” Lena insists staring at Jess’ wide eyes, trying to reassure her. “They will have to surrender. I’m the next in line. But for that to happen we will have to get Sinclair’s, Corben’s and the Queen Mother’s soldiers out of the way…”

 

“So that’s it?” Jess asks breathless.

 

Lena nods, waiting for anyone to object. This was sink or swim. Luke was right. They have to divide Lex’s Army or they wouldn’t stand a chance otherwise. But by dividing his army Lena was also dividing hers and like Jess said, her squad and Luke’s would only be sitting duck, fending off the bulk of Lex’s Army for the Resistance to storm the Castle against the Queen Mother’s Guards and hope for a quick surrender. If they failed or dragged the fight too long, there was no going out of this alive.

 

“This is suicide…” Jess suddenly whispers and chaos erupts in the room.

 

Lena hears them argue in fear, Luke and Alex butting head like usual, while Maggie stands on the side in support of her wife, throwing quips here and there. Lena sees the dejected face, the fear, the anger… She feels Kara’s hand in hers and can’t help but rub Kara’s warm golden ring. _Rage, Rage against the dying of the light,_ he would whisper.

 

“The odds are against us,” Lena says loudly, interrupting the shouting match. “They have always been. We’ve always fought against the odds. Against Krypton, against Daxam we were always one step of losing…” Lena watches them, these people she cares so much about. Those she learned to survive with and those she couldn’t live without. “ _Do not go gentle into that good night,_ ” Lena whispers fiercely noticing the Luthorians around the table suddenly perk up at the familiar saying; surprised and struck by the cry of war, of hope that had been passed through generations. “We fought and we are still here, we fought and we came out victorious. The odds are against us but that never stopped us before. This is no different. We will fight! We will-“

 

“ _Rage_!” Luke exclaims right beside her, a twinkle in his eyes and a wide grin on his face. Lena smiles back, relieved to always have him watching her back.

 

“ _Rage against the dying of the light_!” Jess whispers with a teary smile, nodding toward her Captain, thankful and ready.

 

Lena nods. “We will do as we planned. Luke will take on the City Wall’s. Jess will protect the Infantry while we storm the Castle. If we can get close enough to Lex, we will capture him and put an end to this!” Lena promises looking at her Lieutenant and Sergeant drawing strength from their faith in her.

 

“And if we can’t capture him?” Alex asks softly, apologetic.

 

Lena gulps, struck to the heart. “I will do what is necessary.” Lena knew she had to overthrow her brother. And yet, it is the first time that she fully realizes she might have to kill him to do so.

 

Alex nods gravely and Lena feels Kara’s hand squeeze her maddeningly trembling fingers.

 

“Dismissed,” Lena whispers shell-shocked. Had she been too naïve to think that Lex would surrender of his own volition? This wasn’t a game anymore. Lena knew Lex despised losing. He would play the game until one of them would be checkmate and nothing less.

 

Kara looks at her in concerns as everyone files out of the room to brief their squad. Lena shakes her head, seeing Alex and Maggie waiting for Kara to join them at the door and organize the Infantry. Kara nods, kissing her forehead softly before letting go. Lena hides the trembling by crossing her arms over chest.

 

She exhales forcefully, in the hope of cleansing herself from this nervous energy, this dread that has suddenly taken over her body. Lena closes her eyes and breathes. She lets herself have this one moment of fear, helplessness and doubt in that lone room under the ground because she knows that as soon as she will open them, all of these feelings would be gone, replaced instead by the will to fight for something more.

 

 _Rage, Rage against the dying of the light_ , he would whisper. Lena nods to herself. She has stuff to do. She needs to compose a team who will go back to the border with her.

 

***

 

She stares at the ceiling of the room she and Kara called their own. It was only a matter of time now before a member of her team comes and gets her. She had asked for the quiet. The short reprieve. If she could, she would have taken a bow and shoot countless of arrows to quiet her mind but they didn’t have this luxury in here... There’s a knock on the door and Lena’s eyes widens, standing abruptly. It couldn’t be time to go already…

 

“Hey,” Luke says, opening the door.

 

Lena smiles in relief. “Hi,” she sits back on the cot, her back against the wall, motioning for Luke to do the same.

 

He nods, closing the door behind him and sits, his shoulder pressed against hers. “Feels like old times, doesn’t it?”

 

Lena nods breathing deeply. “It does.”

 

“Are you scared?” He asked watching the opposite wall intently, the clench of his jaw more prominent than usual.

 

“Immensely.”

 

“I’m not,” he whispers with a smile, his gaze intent on the wall. “What you said earlier, at the meeting… It has been awhile since I heard it.”

 

It’s been awhile since she let herself remember too. “I know.”

 

Luke shudders and Lena feels the reverberation in her shoulder and then all over her body. “It made me think…” he trails off, looking oddly composed.

 

“About what?” She asks him, confused. She watches her best friend steel himself, a light shine in his eyes.

 

“Life…” he utters quietly. “I… Sometimes, it feels like there is nothing beyond this,” he says finally looking at her and Lena sees the tear falling down from his other cheek. “Beyond this battle and the next and the next… It made me forget what I’m fighting for…”

 

She stares at him breathless, a lump in her throat. “What are you fighting for?”

 

He smiles and looks back toward the wall, clenching his jaw to hide the trembling of his lips. “Do you remember before our first battle? We were at a campfire and the Captain asked us what we hoped for?” Lena nods taking his hand in hers. “I still want that… I want to go at sea and fish. I’ll come visit you in that little cottage you wanted to live in… and we’ll eat fish… around a campfire,” Luke whispers smiling still as Lena hears the tears in his voice. “I still want that,” he repeats quietly. She nods hiding her tears against his trembling shoulder. “Your wife will be there of course.” Lena lets out strangled laugh as he puts his arm around her in a side hug. “Looks like she is not going to let you go anytime soon.”

 

“I’m not letting her go either,” Lena whispers.

 

“Good. I’m glad you managed to sweep her off her feet…” She sees the teasing smile on his lips and braces herself for the dig. “Because you weren’t doing so well the last time…”

 

“Shut up!” She hits him in the chest as he laughs, his eyes twinkling in mirth. He rubs his chest in mock hurt and stands. Lena stands too, a sudden worry animating her. “This is not goodbye, is it?”

 

Luke shakes his head, smiling in reassurance.

 

“Because it feels a lot like it,” she whispers taking him in her arms and holds on to him as hard as she can.

 

He chuckles deeply, the shake of his laughter travelling through her body by the skin of her cheek. He holds on to her too. “Don’t worry. Whatever happens, I have your back.”

 

The door opens behind them. “Oh, uh, sorry… for interrupting,” Kara stammers and Lena laughs against Luke’s shoulder.

 

“No. It’s fine,” Luke replies detangling himself from her. “Lena was missing you anyway…”

 

Lena frowns. “What? What are you talking about?”

 

He winks at Kara and Lena sees her blush. “You really did a number on her… See how dazed she looks…” He whispers to the blonde motioning to Lena’s bewildered expression as he go out of the door, a teasing smile thrown her way.

 

Lena fumes. “Luke!”

 

Kara frowns watching her Lieutenant surely retreat out of the tunnel before Lena can strangle him. “What? What’s just happened?”

 

“That’s Luke,” Lena’s sighs. “He is a great friend but sometimes he just likes to annoy everyone.”

 

Kara laughs closing the door behind her. “Yeah, I thought Alex was really going to kill him earlier… Here!” She says handing her a little basket. “I found us some food.”

 

“Thank you. I’m starving,” Lena brings the basket to the cot and looks inside. Kara sits next to it and Lena hands her some bread with some dry meat.

 

They eat in silence and Lena feels Kara’s gaze stray toward her every few minutes. She waits chewing on some dry fruits. She knows she won’t have to wait long; patience wasn’t really Kara’s strongest suit. Kara fidgets next to her. Three… two… one…

 

“Are you okay?” She finally asks in a breath. Lena smirks. “I mean, I saw your face when we talked about Lex…”

 

Lena finishes her food and sees Kara put the basket on the ground, opening the space between them for Lena to get closer. To open up. She frowns. Old habits die hard. “You don’t think I can do it? You don’t think I can kill him?” She asks crossing her arms.

 

“That’s not what I said,” Kara sighs and scoots toward her. Her knee touching her thigh. She pries Lena’s arms open and takes one of her hand in hers. Lena stares at their tangled fingers. At the golden ring shining on Kara’s annular. “But, I would… I would understand if you can’t…” she continues hesitantly, the pads of her fingers mapping every nooks of Lena’s hand. “My aunt has done horrible things for power and revenge… She ordered my parents’ death… But I still love her, you know?” Kara whispers. “I still feel guilty about it. But I… I still remember the nights when we would sneak outside to that hill I told you about… to see the stars… I still remember the good…”

 

Lena nods, relaxing. Kara sits back against the wall, her shoulder pressed against hers and Lena sighs. “Could you do it? Kill your aunt?”

 

Kara shrugs, uncertain and pained. “I don’t know… Even if it would be the right thing to do for everyone, I don’t know if I could do it. She and Kal are the only family I have left…” she trails off and Lena understands.

 

How could she not understand when she was right now facing the same dilemma? She used to think that Lex couldn’t be saved just to rid herself of the guilt, of having to wonder constantly what she could have done differently to keep him away from this path. But deep down, Lena knows she had always wanted to save him. Deep down, she still feels the guilt of not having done enough… And it makes her so angry.

 

“Lex used to tell me stories,” Lena whispers instead, looking at the wall and thinking of nights running outside or stories in the dark. “He would captivate me with his words and take me on adventures where everything was possible. He is brilliant and gifted and so lonely…” Lena remembers those long hours playing chess, the two of them in that big, cold room. Lena remembers those first few months where she would hide under her bed and Lex would crawl in beside her so that she wouldn’t be alone. “I think that’s why we held on to each other as hard as we did when we were kids. I used to think that it was us against the world. For a time, it was…” Lena breathes shakily and burrows her face in Kara’s neck. “You are right… I don’t know if I can do it…”

 

Kara nods, putting her arm around her shoulders, her lips against her temple. “I’ll be with you, every step of the way. I’ll… I’ll do it for you.”

 

Lena raises her head from her hiding place and stares at Kara’s determined face and steady eyes, in shock.

 

“You are not alone,” she continues fiercely, offering to shoulder the burden together. Lena nods, speechless. Kara kisses her temple. “How long before you have to go?”

 

“An hour, maybe. Someone will come get me. Why?”

 

Kara nods, shy and flustered. “I’ve been meaning to ask you this for awhile but it… it never felt like the right time and I… I feel like there never will be a right time but…” Kara stammers, detaching herself from her.

 

Lena frowns, confused. “Kara?”

 

Kara stops and inhales, not meeting her eyes but frowning at the ring on her finger. “What Jess said… at the meeting? What… What does it mean?” Kara stutters fast, words jumbled, twirling her ring. “Because… I took away my ring once, when I was mad at you and… you engraved it into the ring and…” Kara breathes finally looking at her, confused and anxious. “What does it mean?”

 

Lena gulps watching the golden ring. It feels like ages ago. “It’s a poem. An old one made by a self-destructive, drunkard Luthorian but a brilliant one,” Lena explains and smiles at Kara’s frown. “It’s about his dying father.” The image of her father’s smile as he charges against Krypton for the last time suddenly appears into her mind. “It’s also about defying death. It’s about fighting even when the end is near. Even when everything is lost…” Lena bites her lips as they suddenly shake and watches the understanding slowly dawns on Kara’s face.

 

“You came into my cell and broke me out when I was about to stop fighting…” Lena whispers feeling small and vulnerable, unable to meet Kara’s eyes. “And I thought you were dead,” she recalls laughing in disbelief and grief. “All these years, I would look for you amidst the Kryptonian’s army. At every attacks and raids… I couldn’t find you on the battlefield and a part of me kept thinking that I had killed you… without knowing it,” she finally confesses. “It hurt and I didn’t know why… why sometimes it felt like I couldn’t breathe just at the idea that I…” Lena stops and breathes deeply, willing her tears not to fall. Not to fall apart because it didn’t happen. “I just couldn’t believe it,” she says shaking her head and feels Kara’s hand cradle her jaw. Their eyes meet and Lena feels bewitched. “But when you came back and when we got married I just knew… _Rage against the dying of the light._ You remind me of that,” Lena lays her hand on the one on her jaw, feeling the warm ring against her palm and holds onto it. “Of that rage that just keeps on fighting no matter what. A rage that never gives up. You don’t give up Kara Zor-El,” Kara smiles, small and shy, caressing the skin of her cheek with her thumb. “And to see it on your finger, to touch it… It reminds me not to give up too. Even when I am being a jerk,” Lena jokes, heart suddenly in her throat as Kara straddles her and presses her forehead against hers.

 

Kara nods, nuzzling against her nose and Lena doesn’t know how to breathe anymore. “Yeah, you were kind of a jerk.”

 

“I had… reasons to be,” Lena stutters and closes her eyes at the feel of Kara’s lips against her cheek.

 

“None at all. You were just too stubborn,” Kara whispers against her lips.

 

“Are you… going to kiss me?” Lena asks breathless.

 

“No…” Kara denies against her bottom lip and Lena grabs the back of Kara’s tunic in her hand and doesn’t let go.

 

“It really feels like you might…”

 

“If I kiss you now,” Kara sighs, both hands in Lena’s hair, trapping her body under hers. “It might be hard for me to stop. And you have to go soon.”

 

Lena groans. “Even more reasons to shut up and kiss me now…”Lena doesn't fight against it anymore. She falls and breaks apart against Kara’s lips.

 

Kara kisses like she fights, wholeheartedly, relentlessly. She chases Lena’s lips and holds them prisoners against hers again and again until Lena is forced to surrender, to open her lips and let Kara invade her mouth. It doesn’t feel like a defeat. Lena moans in victory.

 

Kara’s tongue explores the new, conquered land and Lena smiles as she slides her hands greedily over the burning skin of Kara’s waist, stomach and ribs. Kara relents on the assault of her lips as Lena’s hands stops just below her breasts, both breathing heavily. It’s like all the pent-up energy, the years and years of fight and wariness and danger just exploded into that one kiss. As if they just couldn’t wait anymore.

 

Kara nods, biting at the skin of her jaw and Lena resumes her exploration. She relishes in the soft skin and the moans escaping from Kara’s lips. She feels Kara grind against her and Lena wants more, biting Kara’s collarbone, a hand at the small of her back helping the movement of Kara’s hips. Lena wants everything.

 

A sudden knock at the door makes them break apart, slightly.

 

“Captain Luthor! It’s time!” The voice says through the door.

 

“One minute!” Lena breathes harshly against the skin of Kara’s neck. She hears Kara curse above her and Lena muffle a chuckle against her throat, listening to the footsteps walking away from the door and then, she sucks on the skin pulsing just under her lips.

 

“You have to go,” Kara protests against her ear, standing up but not letting go.

 

Lena stands too, a willing captive as Kara walks them toward the door. “I know.”

 

“Don’t be reckless,” Kara whispers against her lips. Holding on till the last second until Lena feels the cold doorknob in her hand.

 

She nods, inhaling the scent of Kara’s skin. “Don’t charge head first.”

 

The blonde chuckles and puts her hand over her own before opening the door. “See you on the battlefield.”

 

Lena nods and slits out of the room as quickly as possible. Kara closes the door and Lena finally breathes, the imprint of Kara’s lips still on her skin, the pounding of her heart giving her the strength to meet the team waiting for her at the end of the tunnel.

 

***

 

Here we are, Lena thinks watching her Kingdom’s border loom over her.

 

It is a quiet affair as the Infantry opens the gate of the border. Lena and her team are quickly put into shackles waiting to be escorted back to the City. A party of twenty escort them and eight of the soldiers catches Lena’s eyes, nodding at her.

 

The first time Kara proposed to overthrow her brother, Lena didn’t take it seriously. She never wanted to lead. She never wanted the Kingdom or the power. If anything, it felt more like a burden than anything else. She had just wanted to be free and she had thought that fleeing her brother would be the solution, for her and those following her.

 

She couldn’t imagine a scenario where she would take on a fight against her brother and survive. On her own? Lena didn’t think it would have been possible.

 

When Kara proposed it to her, Lena remembers watching her with wide eyes, stunned and utterly captivated by the hope and belief in her intense blue eyes as Kara Zor-El asked her to fight.

 

Be the hero Lena never thought herself to be.

 

This is it, Lena thinks as the rampart of the City suddenly appears on the horizon. This is the moment where she’ll know if she can be what Kara saw in her in that little house in Mars Republic.

 

It all feels really ominous. The tense atmosphere, the cloudy sky above them, the jittery feeling in her fingers longing to have a bow in her hands. She knows they have a plan but here, in this carriage, trapped on both side, Lena feels vulnerable and exposed. She feels like thrashing in survival, desperate, angry and hopeless. Lena breathes and steels herself. Ignoring the lifeless eyes from gripping her ankles and the darkness from swallowing her. Rage, Rage against the dying of the light, he would whisper. Lena thinks instead of Kara’s lips on hers. Her warm body pressed so eagerly into her own as they battled for something they would both win. If she closes her eyes, she can still feel the heat of her breath hitting her skin as Kara bit into her neck. Lena smiles as they pass the Gates of the City. Kara promised to help her in any way she could at the time. Lena didn’t think that just the thought of her in the City, right now, waiting, watching over her would be enough to calm her racing heart and bring her back into the fight.

 

They make her step out of the carriage, the soldiers who nodded at her on either side. The rest of her team is escorted away where, Lena knows, the Resistance will free them quietly.

 

She’ll make the walk alone.

 

She notices the silence as everyone watches her; Corben’s Infantry, the civilians behind them as she is escorted straight toward the Castle. They all watch her with apprehension. Lena sees the hope in the civilians’ eyes, the fear and she nods, head held high as she vows silently to free them. As she vows to take back her City.

 

It’s weird to walk on these streets paraded as a fallen enemy when she remembers running in them with Luke, laughing and joking around. It’s terrifying to see the innkeeper nods solemnly at her from the door of the Tavern her Archers used to frequent and other faces she recognizes from her day to day life, all watching her in expectation and hope.

 

Lena clenches her jaw and breathes at the sudden sight of Alex standing in the crowd. She breathes again as she sees Jess, Maggie, Vasquez and more of her company dispersed on both side. She is not alone, Lena remembers as she meets intense blue eyes following her till Lena passes her. Till Lena stands in front of the Castle Courtyard where the prisoners are kneeling in front of her.

 

Lex watches her from the steps of the Castle, tall and intimidating. Corben, Sinclair and the Queen Mother on either side.

 

“Lena,” Lex greets her in that pleasant voice he always used when he would tell her stories. “I’m glad you came back.”

 

The soldiers holding her step away as Lex and the shadows following him walk down the stairs to stand behind the line of prisoners separating them.

 

“You have me,” Lena says catching Eli’s eyes, battered and bruised, as he suddenly raises his head at her voice. “Let them go.”

 

“I was deeply hurt when I learned that you fled, Lena.” Lex says instead, walking calmly behind the line of kneeling, trembling prisoners. She feels their eyes on her, hopeful and scared while she stands there helpless and chained, like them. “I looked for you.”

 

“You framed me!” She hisses, remembering the month long captivity in the Kryptonian prison.

 

“You left me!” He retorts with rage and Lena sees the madness in his eyes, the sadness and the hurt. She sees the boy she loves dearly pushed toward the edge and fall into the darkness that threatened everyday to swallow her whole. “Everything I did, I did it to protect you,” he whispers madly and Lena nods.

 

“Let them go, Lex. I’m here. It’s over.”

 

He shakes his head, smiling at her apologetic. “You don’t understand little sister. This is only the beginning…” he says, unsheathing his sword.

 

“Lex, no!” Lena screams as two of her escorts hold her back.

 

“Luthorians!” Lex bellows addressing the crowd behind her. “Let’s give a warm welcome to my dear sister who betrayed her kingdom and her King,” she watches him helplessly as he walks back and forth behind the line of prisoners, his sword still and at the ready. “Let’s give her our mercy for her faults and our kindness for her repentance. But above all,” he tones, stopping behind Eli, who gulps staring at her straight in the eyes. “Let’s teach her not to do it ever again!”

 

“LEX!” Lena trashes against those restraining her. She hears the grumbling crowd at her back and pleads desperately as Eli shakes his head at her with a smile.

 

“Any last word to your Captain, boy?”

 

Eli looks at her and she can’t breathe. It’s like time has stopped. She sees him as the young boy who kept following her, begging her to teach him how to shoot. And she sees him now, a young man, trembling bravely; eyes shining with tears as a fierce determination and stubbornness fill his eyes. "It's been an honor," he utters loudly and Lena watches Lex sink his sword into his back, the tip coming out of Eli’s chest. "Captain," Eli breathes for the last time, blood pouring out of his mouth as he falls to the ground, lifeless eyes trained on hers, following her till the very end.

 

She hears herself scream as utter chaos suddenly erupts behind her.

 

The soldiers unsheathe their sword and form a wall around her as another one free her from her chains.

 

Lena pushes them away. She sees Lex glaring at her from the protection of his shadows and is quickly escorted back to the Castle as the Queen Mother’s Guard fills the courtyard.

 

The soldiers push her back behind them, forming a wall against the oncoming threat. Lena is about to make a run for it, watching desperately the space between her and Lex increase exponentially when a hand claps around her shoulder and turns her around. Intense blue eyes stares back at her.

 

“Together, remember?” Kara says, handing her a longbow and a quiver as a spare one full of arrows hangs over her back.

 

Lena nods and inhales forcefully through her nose. She refuses to let her eyes stray toward Eli’s lifeless eyes as the other prisoners flee behind her. She watches the soldiers and Kara brace themselves as the first wave of Guards crashes against them. Lena steps aside and aims toward the Guards coming down the steps. Nock, draw, release. Arrows after arrows. She watches them fall one by one, tumbling down the stairs, struck suddenly in the chest, neck or thigh.

 

She throws a glance behind her and sees the Resistance fight against Corben’s Infantry. Lena curses under her breath, shooting into a Guard’s leg as he runs toward her and crumbles to the ground screaming in pain until he yanks the arrow out and Lena knows he’s dead. They are on their own.

 

Suddenly a Guard gets too close for her to shoot and she dives back behind a soldier who puts his body in between hers and the Guard. He promptly impales him with his sword and doesn’t look back as he continues their defense until the Resistance arrives. Lena has to step further back from the fight to aim at the Guards but they are closing in on them more rapidly than she can shoot.

 

“LENA! ON YOUR RIGHT!” Kara yells and Lena doesn’t question the order. She shoots on her right and a Guard falls dead at her feet.

 

She hears a scream to her left as another charge toward her. Lena shoots him in the neck and he falls gurgling on his own blood. She releases another one straight in between two of her soldiers, the arrow lodging deeply into the hand of a Guard about to strike Kara from the back. Kara turns at the scream of pain and finishes him off with a clean cut to the neck.

 

A clank of metal resounds behind her and Lena grimaces in pain as she receives a blow to the nose, thick liquid gushing out of it. She drops to the ground instinctively to avoid the slash to her abdomen. She feels the sword graze her back and grits her teeth against the pain. She rolls away, feeling her blood and the gore on the ground against her clothes. She nocks, draws and releases an arrow into the Guard’s chest before he can come any closer.

 

Kara comes up behind her and hauls her up to her feet and pushes her back toward the soldiers. They are surrounded, Lena realizes. They form a circle, back pressed against one another as the Guards closes in on them, watching them warily, ready to strike.

 

“Where’s our Infantry?” Lena shoots an arrow at a Guard’s chest. She feels Kara’s back press against hers.

 

“I don’t know,” Kara grunts behind her. The gurgling sound of blood reaches Lena’s ears as one of their soldiers is tugged into the mass of Guards, away from their circle and falls to the ground. “KEEP THE CIRCLE TIGHT!” Kara orders.

 

Nock, draw, release. Over and over again and yet, it feels like it doesn’t make a difference. There’s always more Guards coming toward them. She fends off a Guard with her bow, too close for her shoot as he nearly slices her with his sword. The momentum of his failed strike exposes his neck to her and Lena jams an arrow straight into the tender skin as blood spurts everywhere. The Guard falls against her and Lena uses his dead weight to push him into another Guard’s path who stumbles backward. Kara grips his chainmail in the confusion and pierces him through the chest.

 

A sudden rise of cries of rage reaches her ears as their circle is quickly surrounded by the Resistance. Lena sees Alex hack her way toward them, blood and sweat dripping down her face. The Guards falls one by one and retreats back toward the steps of the Castle.

 

“We got held up! Sorry!” Alex bellows stabbing a Guard through the stomach.

 

Lena nods and inhales deeply, shakily before she shoots at a Guard coming at Kara’s back. He falls to the ground. Lena grits her teeth as she dive away from a Guard, unable to shoot as an ally steps into her line of sight. Lena holds on to her arrow. It’s too crowded. She can’t shoot without risking touching one of theirs. She tastes the sweat and the blood on her lips, watching desperately the mass of bodies clashing into one another. She aims at the top of the stairs but her aim is off and her arrow bounces away on a Guard’s helmet.

 

“We need to open a way!” Lena yells as she feels the mass of allied bodies bump into hers in the confusion and chaos.

 

“Alright!” She hears Kara says somewhere beside her. Kara grabs her arm and pushes her behind her, retreating back into the heart of the Resistance.

 

“What are you doing?” Lena screams.

 

“Trust me!”

 

Lena watches the front of the battle disappear as they back away from the Castle.

 

“FORMATION!” Kara suddenly yells and Lena sees their Infantry regroup and form a thick wall all around them. Guards are tugged into the formation and slain by the soldiers inside, one by one. “ONWARD!” Lena feels them push back into the Guards lines, as one entity, hacking into them as they trudge up the steps of the Castle.

 

Lena finally puts her foot on the first step, red with blood, and then the next and the next. She takes a second to breathe in the relative safety of the formation. She discards her nearly empty quiver and takes Kara’s full one.

 

They are suddenly on flat ground and Lena knows they reach the Castle.

 

“GO! GO! GO!” Kara yells and Lena hears the front part of their Infantry scream in rage as they pierce a hole into the defense line and open up a way for them. Kara runs toward the doors and Lena follows, shooting arrows after arrows over Kara’s shoulders as they make their way one step closer to the King.

 

Lena, Kara, Maggie, Alex and a handful of soldiers breaks suddenly into the Castle. There is no one inside. The sudden silence is deafening, the sound of the battle muted by the closed doors.

 

“What?” Maggie breathes, confused as they all look around the empty Great Hall. “Where are they? Could they have escaped?”

 

Lena shakes her head, swiping away at the blood she can now feel under her nose. She frowns at the copper taste and she knows she made more of a mess. There was no way Lex would leave. He was waiting for her. Somewhere. “We have to search the Castle.”

 

“It might be a trap,” Alex retorts.

 

“It is a trap,” Lena confirms. “But we have to get him before they all die outside.”

 

“Alright,” Kara whispers. Lena frowns, a lump in her throat at the blood she sees matting Kara’s hair down to her ear. “It’s not mine,” she reassures her. “Lead the way.”

 

Lena nods and draws an arrow, at the ready.

 

The cold walls of her home suddenly become even more oppressing than they already were as they make their way, silent and alert though the corridors. Leaving bloody footprints on the pristine floor. Lena leads them toward the Throne Room, a hunch she decided to follow. From a strategic standpoint, it would be the best place to wait out an enemy. They would have to get through the whole Castle just to get there.

 

Lena feels Kara beside her, the sound of their breathing too loud in the silent Castle. It makes her nervous. Every step, every clank of metal feels like a scream resounding in the empty corridors. Lena clenches her jaw and wills her terrified mind not to see every shadow as a foe. Or every sound as a sign of impending danger. She can’t lose her mind now. They finally reach the long corridor leading to the Throne Room and Lena knows in her guts that something is wrong. She just knows. She watches warily the numerous doors on either side. Innocent study rooms and parlors but that now could hide Guards ready for an ambush.

 

As soon as the idea crosses her mind, Lena curses herself as the doors opens one by one and Guards flood the corridor. Corben and Sinclair wait for them at the other end. Lena glares at them.

 

“Princess Lena,” Lady Veronica drawls in the silence. A spear in her hand. “Your presence was dearly missed. You should check out my establishment, there have been some improvements made…”

 

“I’m not interested in your type of entertainment,” Lena cuts in abruptly.

 

Lady Veronica tilts her head with a smirk. “Not anymore?”

 

Lena grits her teeth and she feels Kara tense beside her.

 

“Kill them all,” Lady Veronica orders and suddenly all of the Guards charge as one.

 

Lena steps back quickly. Nock, draw, release. A Guard falls on his knees. She shoots again and again before she feels someone grab her from the side and push her violently. Lena grunts and crashes heavily against the wall, rattled and confused, a ringing sound in her ears. She feels the sword come toward her and she ducks instinctively as it slices the skin of her cheek and finishes its course against the wall. Lena throws her shoulder wholeheartedly into the Guard’s chest and pushes him to the ground. She punches him in the face and stabs him in the neck with an arrow.

 

Lena hangs her bow over her back and steals his sword just in time to meet the sword of another Guard before he cuts off her head. She sees blonde hair crash into him from behind and Lena stands up quickly as another one charges at her.

 

She slashes into him without thinking. He howls in pain and then falls, silent onto the ground. Another comes toward her and another one but Lena doesn’t care. She slashes and stabs until she can no longer discern their cries of pain from her screams of rage. It’s like her vision has narrowed to this one moment, this one space where the only thing she has to do is duck, dive away and stab, slash, cut over and over again. Lena only feels the strain on her shoulders as swords clashes against hers. She barely feels the blood running down her nose anymore or the taste of blood sitting heavily on her tongue.

 

Someone grabs her by the shoulder. Lena is about to stab them in the chest when she realizes it is Maggie who pushes her away from two Guards coming from behind her. Lena nods and meets the one on the right while Maggie takes the one on the left. The Guard screams and kicks her in the stomach. Lena doubles over, wheezing in pain. She is thrown to the ground by a punch to the face, her jaw trembles in pain as she spits even more blood onto the floor. She watches in panic as the Guard raises his sword above her and stops. Black blood coming out of his mouth as the tip of a sword comes right through his chest. Lena exhales deeply as she stares at the falling body, revealing a bloody Kara Zor-El just behind.

 

A body suddenly crashes into the Kryptonian. Corben punches Kara in the face and Lena hears her grunt. She sees red and charges toward him before something makes her trip and Lena plummets to the ground. She quickly and painfully raises a dead body as a shield to protect herself from the spear thrust toward her. Lady Veronica smiles smugly, motioning her to stand up with a raise of a brow.

 

Lena grits her teeth and screams charging straight at her. Her sword clashes against the shaft of the spear violently. The force of the blow jostles her body from her arms to her teeth till Lady Veronica pushes her away with the other end of her spear in a well-aimed blow to the side. Lena feels out of breath, wheezing slightly as she sees the door of the Throne Room just behind the Knight. Lady Veronica raises an eyebrow at her, twirling her spear in challenge.

 

“LENA! GO! I’ll TAKE HER!” Alex screams as she charges into the surprised Knight.

 

Lena doesn’t think and runs toward the double doors. She sees Alex clash against the woman from the corner of her eyes. There’s no one left separating her from the door anymore and Lena throws her body into it. The doors open. She crashes to the floor, sliding nearly to the Queen Mother’s feet. Her bloody clothes leaving a wet, red trail on the marble floor.

 

“Lena…” the Queen Mother says, watching her with those cold eyes she was so used to see. “Lex is waiting for you.”

 

Lena stands back up, panting and she glances toward the Throne but it is empty. She frowns and Lillian motions toward the stairs leading to the balcony and Lena gulps at the dark steps.

 

She clenches her jaw and stares at Lillian warily as she backs away toward the stairs. But Lillian doesn’t make a move. She only watches her with that cold stare of hers.

 

Lex doesn’t turn toward her as she reaches the final step. Check. He watches the Throne Room instead. The sound of struggles suddenly reaches her ears as the Resistance and the rest of the Guards bursts into the Throne Room, continuing the fight below.

 

“LENA!” Kara screams.

 

Lena breathes, scared and apprehensive. “Lex, it’s over…” she whispers.

 

He ignores her, silent and still.

 

“The Resistance is outside the wall. The border is under my control,” Lena lies. “It’s over.”

 

Her brother suddenly turns toward her, betrayal shining in his eyes. “You allied yourself with the House of El,” Lex states calmly.

 

Lena approaches closer to the edge and sees the Resistance have the advantage against Lex’s last line of defense. Their grunts and cries of pain echoing all around.

 

“Why? They are our enemies,” Lex hisses at her.

 

Lena sees the loaded crossbow in his hand and gulps. “Not all of them,” she whispers, thinking of intense blue eyes and blonde hair. Lips on her skin and the scent of honey and mint.

 

“I can protect you, Lena. I can make this world a better place,” Lex whispers full of rage and fear. “The world our father wanted us to live in!”

 

Lena shakes her head, sorry and sad at her brother’s blindness and at his incapability to see beyond when she knows for a fact that he used to be a dreamer, when she knows for a fact that he could create a world so much brighter than the one they were living in. “You can’t live in fear, Lex. There is more to this world than what you see.”

 

Lex laughs and points the crossbow at her.

 

Lena gulps, fingers trembling. She hears the soft sound of her sword fall against the thick carpet. She can’t do it. She can’t kill him “Lex, please! Put it down,” Lena says feeling her bow at her back but she can’t reach it to defend herself. Lena looks into his eyes and she doesn’t know how. “We can still change the world. You and me.”

 

“All these years,” Lex whispers, a chill suddenly runs into her body as the crossbow lifts away from her. “I spent them protecting you, protecting this Kingdom! And all they did was killing us, those Kryptonians!” Lex aims toward Kara and Lena suddenly doesn’t know how to breathe.

 

“Don’t Lex, please!” Lena screams in the sudden silence, stepping forward. “I love her!”

 

Lex stops and stares at her with empty eyes, thrown on a path where it is now too late to stop or even go back. Lena glances down the balcony and sees Kara staring back at her. “Lex, please.”

 

“It’s too late, little sister,” he whispers regretfully.

 

Lex shoots as her own arrow fly straight into his heart.

 

Lena is the best archer in the Kingdom. The fastest too. And she watches in shock as her brother falls over the balcony. Her trembling fingers still on the string of her bow.

 

Kara cries in pain below. Alex’s scream resound in the Throne Room. Lena gasps horrified as she is suddenly the only one left. The last Luthor. She hears Lillian’s cries echoing against the walls and sees the woman she loves bleeding on the ground; Alex’s calling her name over and over again.

 

It’s hard to breathe. It’s hard to see. Her fingers shake and Lena howls in pain as she lets go of her bow. She is dizzy, the floor moves under her feet as she tries to reach the stairs. She feels the cold stone on her hand, palming the walls on her way down desperate to find a way out, from the balcony and from her mind. She feels her heart stutter painfully, undecided if it wants to race or just crumble inside her chest. Lena reaches the last step in a haze as she watches Kara sitting on the ground clutching at her shoulder.

 

“She is okay!” Alex exclaims, delirious herself as soon as she sees her. “She is fine!”

 

Lena falls to the ground in relief, out of it as her whole body shuts down. She feels the wall behind her and cries. Fingers trembling as Lex’s lifeless eyes stares at her from across the room. His blood pooling under him. Lena shudders. It’s over.

 

Voices echoes in the Castle, reverberating on the cold walls. “THE KING IS DEAD,” they say. “THE KING IS DEAD,” they scream in joy as Lena stares at her brother’s lifeless eyes. The scream bounces off against the wall over and over again until it reaches the whole City.

 

Lena watches everything unfold absentmindedly. She watches soldiers take away Lady Veronica and the Queen Mother away. She hears them laugh in relief and congratulates each other from outside the Throne Room. She watches them throw a sheet over her brother’s body. Lex no longer stares at her and Lena finally sees the intense blue eyes fixed on hers, asking her to breathe. Lena does. The fog lifts away.

 

“You’re okay, Lena. Breathe with me,” Kara whispers, cradling her jaw and Lena nods not believing it herself. She is okay.

 

Kara helps her stand back up, nearly supporting all of her weight. Lena lets herself fall into her arms, the scent of blood, sweat and this unmistakable perfume of honey and mint still lingering on her skin. She sees bodies and so much red all over the floor. She sees Jess, blood and dirt all over her face as she talks to an equally bloody Vasquez. They both stops talking and smile as Lena and Kara steps out of the Throne Room. Jess laughs and takes her in her arms, holding on tightly.

 

Lena laughs too, relieved as she feels Jess grip her shoulder and will herself not to look at those lifeless eyes on the ground. Not now that she can’t wait to see the eyes of those she fought for. Those who fought alongside her from the very beginning. She looks around, a lump in her throat, as she waits for her Lieutenant to suddenly appear. He does not. “Where is Luke?” Lena raps, holding on to Kara harder, as she stares at her Sergeant begging silently.

 

“I don’t know,” Jess replies and Lena feels tears burning in her eyes and a sudden breathlessness overtakes her. Lena hides her face against Kara’s throat as she tries to breathe. Fishes and campfires echoing into her mind.

 

“You are okay, Lena.” Kara whispers but she isn’t so sure anymore. She doesn’t know anything anymore.

 

“Look who we’ve found!” Alex suddenly exclaims from the other end of the corridor. Lena turns toward her and see her Lieutenant, limping toward them, bruised and bloody, supported by both Maggie and Alex. “We found the idiot crawling on the stairs!”

 

“I nearly got my leg cut in half, thank you!” He grumbles and Lena laughs wetly. “Hey, Lena,” Luke says taking her in his arms. “I told you not to worry.”

 

“You did.” She burrows herself in his arms. Her last link to her childhood. Her last family.

 

“We did it.”

 

Lena nods against his shoulder. They’ve done it.

 

“I really fucking need a drink,” Luke exclaims letting her go.

 

“I second that!” Alex nods, putting his arm back around her shoulder.

 

Lena smiles at them and squeezes Kara against her. The blonde winces.

 

“Are you okay?” Lena frowns, suddenly more worried as she watches Kara clutch her shoulder, blood staining the sleeves of her arm.

 

“You should check out the wound, just in case, Kara has never been cut before. It might get infected quickly,” Alex says.

 

Lena nods, her gaze straying back to her brother, in the Throne Room.

 

“We’ll take care of it. Go!” Maggie whispers.

 

Lena thanks them and guides Kara to her quarters. She knows there are medical supplies there. They open the door and Lena sees that it is still thrashed from Lex’s fit of rage when he learned that she fled.

 

“I’m fine. I promise. I’m alright,” Kara grumbles.

 

“You winced. And you screamed earlier…” Lena retorts not believing a word the blonde will say until she can check the wound for herself.

 

“I know. I’m sorry. I was shocked.”

 

“Sit here,” Lena says motioning to the sofa. “And take your chainmail off. We’ll need to clean the wound,” Lena goes to the side room to fill a pitch of water and take some fresh bandages with her. She washes her trembling hands into a bucket and watches the water turn red. She runs a wet cloth over her face and neck to wash off the blood on her skin before joining Kara with some more water and light medical supplies.

 

“I changed my mind,” Kara says, bare-chested blood all over her arm, seeing her approach. “It really hurts,” she mutters at the cut on her shoulder and pokes at it. “How did you manage to survive all of your wounds?”

 

Lena kneels before her and examines the wound. She rolls her eyes at Kara’s injury. “The bolt grazed your skin, Kara. It doesn’t look too deep but it might bleed for awhile. Besides, you dug into my shoulder with a knife…” Kara smiles sheepishly. “You’ll be fine.”

 

“It’s going to be my first battle scar,” Kara whispers oddly excited.

 

Lena smirks and pours some alcohol on it.

 

Kara yelps. “Wait… Wait… Is it normal?” she hisses, holding her shoulder and turning away from her.

 

Lena smiles innocently. “What?”

 

“I feel like it is throbbing!” She utters between a whisper and a scream, eyes wide, panicked and fascinated at the same time.

 

“You’ll survive. I promise,” Lena laughs and passes her a cloth for Kara to clean the blood away from her skin and other scratches they discover here and there. Lena helps her but she is quickly distracted by the line of her neck and that little patch of skin just between her breasts where Lena can imagine the soft thrumming of Kara’s heart. It’s like nothing else matters but that little fluttering on Kara’s skin.

 

“Lena…”

 

Lena hums, fascinated by the soft skin and kisses it tenderly. Kara’s heart pounding against her lips. Lena breathes against it, head pressed between Kara’s breasts. “Can you believe it? We’re still alive…” Lena mumbles, nuzzling the soft slope with her lips.

 

She feels Kara’s chest tremble before the blonde cradles her jaw into her hand and kisses her. Wholeheartedly, relentlessly. Kara guides her to the sofa, nearly lifting her. The pot of water on the little table next to them falls to the ground. Lena sighs feeling Kara’s hands over her thigh, opening her legs to slide in and get as close as she can to Lena’s skin.

 

She burns deliciously as Kara’s lips trails over her throat and tears away at her clothes, one by one, kissing every inch of skin discovered.

 

“Don’t let go,” Kara whispers.

 

“I won’t.”

 

Kara stands and takes their trousers off in one swift motion before laying over her gently. Lena moans at the heat of Kara’s skin over her own, holding on to Kara’s back as it flexes and bend as the blonde kisses her collarbone and grinds into her.

 

Lena surrenders to the movement, to the heat, to Kara's lips trailing a path down her stomach kissing, biting every inch of skin on her way down.

 

Lena surrenders and it feels glorious, otherworldly even as she feels her blood rushing into her veins, right between her legs, pulsing between Kara's lips as Lena goes higher and higher. It's enough to make her dizzy. It's enough to make her scream.

 

Kara's hand trails back up over her stomach until Lena traps it into her hand, over her wildly beating heart and holds on. After this, after everything they've been through, Lena can't imagine ever letting go.

 

Lena shakes and trembles, suspended in time, toeing the fine line between life and death. Her heart stops, she tenses, there is no more air... until everything rushes back in, the air, her blood, her mind. Lena feels her heart rage inside her ribcage and she has never felt more alive than she feels right now, spent and boneless as Kara kisses her thigh softly, lovingly. It takes her breath away.

 

And the only way for her to breathe normally again is to steal Kara's breath from her lips. Lena smirks in delight at Kara's surprised laugh as Lena tugs at her hand, away from her chest to lay it above her head. Kara lands over her, straddling her waist, wet lips and rosy cheeks.

 

It's weird and terrifying to have this wonderful being hovering over her and yet, to have her at her complete mercy. To be trapped under this former, longstanding, powerful foe and yet, still feel absolutely free. It's a strange dichotomy that makes Lena bite, suck and soothe Kara's lips for an answer. The best thing is, Lena doesn't think she will ever find one and so, she continues. She kisses Kara's lips and there are other questions begging to be answered. Kara's tongue begs to be chased; her body begs to be explored. Lena forgets why she is looking for answers in the first place when she hears Kara whimper against her ear, burning cheek pressed against her temple as Lena's fingers stroke the inside of her thigh slowly, meticulously like the traps she used to set over the border for Kara to fall in just to see the look of rage in her blue eyes.

 

It worked then; it still works now as Kara groans in frustration and grabs her hand to guide her where she wants it.

 

"You are impossible!"

 

Lena chuckles against her neck, biting the skin softly as Kara does what she always do. Charge headfirst and rolls her hips over her fingers and set a rhythm. Lena follows easily and claims every inch of new territory with the pads of her fingers until Kara kisses her, frantic and out of breath and Lena wants more.

 

Lena wants to see her fall apart and let go.

 

The thought suddenly takes over her mind as Lena lets go of the hand above her head to tangle it in blonde tresses. She pulls Kara’s head away from the skin of her neck which the blonde had been sucking on avidly to look at her face, eyes screwed shut, chest rising and falling at every roll of her hips. Lena changes the pace and like she does with her bow she draws the string of Kara's body until she sees the woman gasp and tense above her. Kara misses a step, and then two and then three before her back bows before Lena’s eyes and Kara lets go completely.

 

Lena watches in awe as she brings Kara back to her with greedy kisses and gentle strokes. Kara's half-hearted protest turns into moans and desperate buckling of hips as she tenses again and her body shakes over hers relentlessly, her groans and sighs captured by Lena's lips.

 

Lena wants more. She doesn’t want to leave the heat of Kara’s body. She wants to keep burning even if it scorches the pads of her fingers. It feels like she can't have enough but Kara's body falls heavily on hers, exhausted and delirious and Lena stops, caressing the soft skin of Kara's back instead, feeling Kara's heart pound wildly against hers.

 

"Why... Why haven't we... done that sooner?" Kara asks, breathless, into her neck. "I feel like it would have solved... so many things!"

 

Lena laughs. "Would it?"

 

"Maybe..." Kara mumbles, nuzzling her nose against hers. "Or maybe not..." She settles next to her, cuddling into her and presses her face against her neck, one of her leg rubbing softly against hers. “What did you do to me? I can't feel my legs anymore.”

 

Lena chuckles and brings the red cape lying on the floor over their body. "Is that a complaint?"

 

"It's an observation."

 

"I'd be happy to show you what happened. Step by step," Lena drawls, her fingers trailing higher and higher over Kara's thigh. Kara groans. "I might add a few things but I'll let you draw your conclusions... What do you say?" Lena whispers and nuzzles Kara's blushing ear suggestively.

 

Kara raises her head from her neck and watches her with narrowed eyes. Lena grins wide at her scowl.

 

"Don't look so smug!"

 

"I'm only trying to be of help," Lena defends herself with a shit-eating grin.

 

Kara scoffs. "Sure, you are."

 

"Look how tense you get?" Lena jokes pressing the pad of her thumb against the crinkles on Kara's brow.

 

"You are making me tense!"

 

"I can definitely make you relax, too." Lena says wiggling her eyebrows.

 

Kara groans, burrowing her head in her collarbone. Lena laughs.

 

"I hate you," Kara grumbles.

 

"No, you don't."

 

The blonde looks back at her. Lena caresses her jaw and Kara leans into it, kissing Lena’s palm, tender and sweet. "No, I don't. I kind of love you."

 

Lena raises an eyebrow at Kara’s smug grin. "Kind of?"

 

"Kind of."

 

Lena smiles. "Liar."

 

Kara agrees and kisses Lena’s smile away. She melts into the kiss, content to lay there and kiss Kara at her heart's content.

 

It’s surreal, Lena thinks, to have this pocket of calm and hope and warmth when she knows that just outside their door chaos still reigns on the corridors of the Luthor’s Castle. Lena doesn’t want to leave. She wants to stay right here, in Kara’s arms and forget about the world and everyone else. Lena never had any point of reference for that sort of things. She doesn’t know if the devotion she has for Kara is normal or too intense. She doesn’t know how to explain this constant breathlessness that has nothing to do with her health or maybe it does… Because Kara makes her heart race, stutter and beat again with just a few presses of her lips. It’s maddening how helpless and hopeful she feels at-

 

Kara pecks her lips, once, twice before detaching herself from her. “I can hear you thinking,” she says looking into her suddenly panicked eyes. “What is it?”

 

“I…” Lena begins and then stops.

 

“Whenever you are ready,” Kara says with a smile, stroking her jaw and Lena surrenders.

 

“I love you,” Lena breathes softly, hesitantly, scared out of her mind. She knows she is in love with Kara, she even told Lex before she-

 

Flashes of the battle appears into her mind. Lex’s blood on the floor. Lex’s blood pouring out of his chest because of her. Her trembling fingers on the string of her bow. His lifeless eyes looking at her, following her-

 

“Lena, breathe!” Blue eyes suddenly says and Lena does automatically, finding an anchor in them. Kara smiles, rubbing her forehead against hers. “Stay with me.”

 

Lena nods and breathes deeply. The fog lifts away. “I just… I never said it before,” she whispers. “To someone,” Lena adds. Kara nods. “It’s scary.”

 

“I’m scared too,” Kara confesses smoothing the line of Lena’s brows with her thumb. “I… It’s not something I planned. I don’t do well with change,” Kara chuckles depreciatingly. Lena nods and detaches herself a bit from Kara, just to be able to see her better and listen to everything. Kara smiles and looks toward the ceiling, sighing. “And I, I feel like everything is changing around me. I can’t control it. We are going from one conflict to another, battle after battle… My sister doesn’t need me as much, Kal saved me from the Phantom Zone but he left me with strangers when I needed him the most and James and I kept having this back and forth into our relationship that confused me to no end!” She says in one breath. Lena smiles and tucks away a strand of hair that fell over her eyes during her rant. Kara turns back toward her, hand under her cheek, torn and undecided. “I just… I didn’t know if I could be both…”

 

Lena frowns. “Both?”

 

“The Kara from before and the one I am now… They feel like two separates entities in my mind. I was…” Kara pauses confused, trying to put words on what she is feeling, trying to explain something she never told herself out loud. Lena takes Kara’s hand and holds it against her lips, gently, and encourages her to go on. Kara exhales and Lena feels her fingers tremble against her lips. “I was so sure of whom I was before. I was so sure of where I belonged, who I could thrust, who I was supposed to be… Even though we were at war, I always had this certainty inside me of knowing… where I fit… in all of this. But now… everything keeps changing and I can’t keep up,” Kara whispers, bitter and furious, holding on to her hand like someone would clutch at a rope in the dark. “Everything keeps changing, except you,” Lena’s eyes widens in surprise. Kara smiles and gravitates closer toward her, close enough for her lips to touch the skin of Lena’s cheek when she talks. “You’ve always been a constant. I used to wonder how your life was… behind the wall,” Kara chuckles embarrassed and Lena feels her heart rage with love and hope. “I’d see you on your high wall, looking at me, challenging me to come closer. It was maddening. You still make me mad,” Kara adds quickly nudging her forehead with her own playfully. Lena laughs. “But I looked into your eyes and I knew…”

 

“What?” Lena whispers, scared and elated. Confused and grateful.

 

“That you were innocent. That we were both dragged into something we had no control over. When Lady Cat gave me your letters, it only confirmed what I already knew. I don’t know how to explain it but it felt right to fight for you. And I’ll keep fighting for you, Lena. Always.”

 

Lena nods, letting go of the hand against her lips to latch onto the back of Kara’s neck and presses her body as close as she can against the burning one that she gets to call hers. “I feel like there's always been a fine line between awe and fear, love and hate and I feel like, I feel like…” Lena stutters against warm lips. “I've been toeing these lines for a long time… with you.”

 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” Kara asks as her hand wanders to Lena’s thigh slowly.

 

Lena nods. “Is it working?”

 

Kara kisses her and Lena forgets about everything else. The war, the fear, the uncertainty and even death. Kara kisses her and it’s like they are suspended in time, hidden from the world, existing somewhere and nowhere at the same time.

 

Their door opens suddenly and time takes back its course as Lena wrenches her lips away from Kara’s and glares at the person standing at the door.

 

“Oh fuck!” Luke looks at them, speechless, a contrite expression on his face as he suddenly turns away.

 

“What? What’s happening?”

 

Lena groans as she hears Alex’s voice hurry toward the door, followed by an equally curious Maggie. They all stop, frozen at the threshold and Lena feels Kara press her body against her back to hide herself better. Lena tries to cover them with the cape the best as she can, blushing under their scrutiny.

 

“Fuck, indeed…” Maggie smiles widely. “Glad you are alright, Kara. Looks like Princess healed you up real good,” Maggie winks at them.

 

Lena chokes and she hears Kara groans behind her.

 

“Would you just close the door and leave us to put our clothes back on?” Kara asks high-pitched and hides her face into Lena’s shoulders. “Please?”

 

Alex looks stunned, stuttering a few times, embarrassed. “Alright, but don’t be long!” She warns them, turning to close the door. Lena sighs in relief.

 

“Oh,” Luke warns chuckling softly. “You can’t trust Lena on that one. She knows how to-“

 

“Luke,” Lena warns. She is going to kill him, slowly. “If you don’t shut up right now, I’ll put you in the same cell as Lady Veronica!”

 

Luke laughs. “Oh come on, Captain! You know she hates my guts.”

 

Lena looks at him pointedly. A silent threat that Luke waves away, having next to no value against the teasing Lena knew she would get from her friend.

 

“Hey!” Kara exclaims. “Let’s focus here!”

 

“No,” Maggie shakes her head and opens the door widely. “This is just too good to pass up,” Kara groans behind her, hitting her head repeatedly against her shoulder. Lena would like to tell Kara to stop but she doesn’t trust the three smirking faces enough to turn her back on them. “Just, you know, out of curiosity, who kissed who first?” Maggie asks.

 

Lena narrows her eyes at their sudden interest.

 

Kara pokes her head out from her shoulders. “Did you bet on us?” She asks scandalized. “Alex!”

 

“What?” The knight shrugs and caves in at Kara’s pointed glare. “Okay, we did! But I totally bet on you, Kara! Sisters’ solidarity and all that, you know…”

 

Lena rolls her eyes. “Will you please close the door?”

 

“Alright, alright!” Luke chuckles, limping away.

 

The door closes behind them and Lena turns toward Kara laughing at her mortified face.

 

“It’s not funny,” she pouts.

 

Kara falls back against the back of the sofa, an arm thrown over her eyes and Lena grins wider. “It is pretty funny.”

 

Kara looks at her incredulously and rolls her eyes. “Let’s get dressed and see what they want.”

 

“Wait…” Lena whispers, stopping Kara from leaving yet with a hand on her arm. Lena sits up and draws Kara back to her and kisses her. “Okay, now we get dressed.”

 

Kara stares at her stunned and blushes. Lena chuckles and they both laugh while quickly getting dressed.

 

***

 

Lena sighs at Luke’s smug grin, a few doors away as they wait for Kara and her to leave her quarters.

 

“We got news,” Alex clears her throat, trying and failing miserably at ignoring the awkwardness all around. “And they aren’t so good.”

 

Maggie nods, winking one last time at Kara who blushes crimson. “J’onn is here. He’s waiting for us.”

 

Lena frowns as she catches Kara’s eyes, a deep worry shining in her blue eyes. “Let’s go,” Lena says taking Luke arms over her shoulders and helping him limp toward where J’onn was waiting for them. The Resistance takes the lead and Lena stalls a bit with Luke at her side.

 

“I would have proposed you to celebrate this victory with a drink or two,” Luke whispers teasingly. “But it looks like you already got a celebration all on your own…”

 

Lena stops and presses her foot against his limping leg. He howls in pain. They both smile innocently at the three women looking back toward them. The women resume their walk and Luke chuckles softly.

 

“Alright, alright. I’ll stop. For now.”

 

Lena laughs, shaking her head. They follow the girls slowly and Lena hangs on to her friend more than she helps him walk. “What happened out there? How’s the Corp?” Lena finally whispers.

 

He sighs and Lena knows it means. “There were some heavy losses,” Luke whispers. “We can’t really put it in numbers right now. But…”

 

Lena nods, biting her lips. “Eli…”

 

She feels Luke shudders against her. “We got his body back. I asked the archers to bring him back to his mother.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Lena breathes, tears burning in her eyes, as Eli’s lifeless eyes stares at her.

 

“It’s not your fault,” Luke whispers, squeezing her shoulder. Tears in his voice. Eli had been following them for as long as she can remember. Lena knows Luke saw him as a protégé ever since Eli got into the Archer’s Corp. “We knew what we were getting into. We all went into it knowing what was at stake.”

 

“He…” Lena bites her lips, not knowing how to convey the thing haunting her mind. “He looked at me Luke,” Lena finally whispers. “I thought we could save him.”

 

 _“Do not go gentle into that good night_ ,” Luke murmurs into her temple. He grips on her shoulder painfully but Lena leans into it as it grounds her to the moment. “Remember? He fought till the very end, Lena. We will too.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Luke smiles at her. They finally arrive to the library, re-purposed into a command room. Jess comes to them and takes Luke’s arm over her shoulder to guide him toward a chair. J’onn stands in front of them, solemn. Lena gets closer to Kara, feeling her warmth against her side.

 

“Queen Lena,” he greets.

 

And Lena sucks on a breath, tongue-tied. “I’m… I’m not…”

 

“You are,” J’onn reaffirm, apologetic. “I come to warn you. Krypton left the battlefield in the Outlawed Territories two days ago. Kal is moving the Resistance as quickly as he can to you. I have intelligence tell me that General Astra got wind of the uprising here and wants to attack during the confusion. We don’t have much time to prepare.”

 

Lena swallows. Fingers trembling.

 

“When do you think they will strike?” Kara intervenes, holding her hand into her warm ones.

 

“In a day or two. This coup is an opportunity for her,” J’onn explains. “Your whole Kingdom is weakened and divided. She’ll want to strike hard and fast.”

 

“I… I…” Lena looks toward Luke who nods at her. Lena breathes deeply. _Rage, Rage against the dying of the light,_ he would whisper. “We’ll need to inform the Kingdom. Call on a meeting,” she says looking to Jess. “Have all the officers come to the Castle as soon as possible and spread the word that the Kingdom is in crisis to the people and that we need representatives, quick. We’ll need all the extra hands to organize our defense. We will meet them in the Throne Room.”

 

Jess nods and run out of the door, Vasquez close on her heels.

 

“What do you intend to do?” Alex asks.

 

Lena inhales. She never wanted to lead. And yet, here she is, suddenly Queen. “Luthorians respect power but it is not enough. I need their trust. I need to mend the gap Lex created for years between the different factions of the Army,” Lena says rubbing at her forehead, trying to remember names of people she could trust, people who fought alongside her from the different branch of their Army. “There’s no way we can win otherwise.”

 

“When is Kal supposed to arrive?” Kara asks, turning toward J’onn.

 

“I’m not sure,” he replies apologetic.

 

“We’ll have to presume that we will be on our own,” Luke says. “We can’t plan a defense with an interrogation mark.”

 

“Your walls will stop them down, right?” Maggie asks hesitantly, looking at Luke first and then at her. Looking for an answer, Lena knows she can’t give.

 

“Only for a while,” Lena mutters, frustrated. “Archers were the main force of dissuasion…” Lena trails off looking at Luke who sighs. “We are half our numbers now. The walls won’t hold for long. The Cavalry or Infantry wouldn’t know how to defend it unless they are on the ground. There’s no time to set up traps,” Lena lists, possibilities and scenarios running in her head. She rubs the golden rings on Kara’s finger, meeting the eyes of those all around the room. “We’ll have to fight them head on and have the walls as our last line of defense.”

 

J’onn frowns and nods gravely. “I can go back to the Resistance. Have them hurry up and prepare an attack. Where will this take place?”

 

“Where it all began.” Lena murmurs to herself. She shakes her head and looks at Luke. “At the border, where my father first led Luthorians against Krypton. Luke will show it to you on the map.”

 

Luke nods at her.

 

“But, first. I’ll need you with me at the Throne Room, J’onn. I’ll need all the allies I can get.”

 

Lena gulps as everyone discuss strategy and possible course of action. She rubs her eyes, feeling the tiredness hit her suddenly. Kara squeezes her hand and Lena burrows her head into her neck, breathing in slowly.

 

“Come on, we should go to the Throne Room,” Kara whispers and Lena nods, trusting Kara to guide her there.

 

The walls of the Castle are still dripping with blood. The white floor has now various hues of red as Guards and soldiers lifts dead bodies, one by one out of the Castle.

 

The Throne Room is how she remembers it, minus Lex’s body on the ground. Lena watches absentmindedly the line of Officers with scowl on their face, wide eyed civilians staring at the remains of their fight apprehensive and wary.

 

Lena nods at them as the room fills up to capacity. She breathes and dives straight in, Kara at her side. They don’t have time to lose.

 

“A new threat is menacing our border. Krypton will attack us in two days at the most. I need you with me,” Lena tones, her voice echoing on the walls. “To prevent them from invading our Kingdom.”

 

A man scoffs and steps forward. “Queen Lena,” he sneers. “You fled the Kingdom and killed our King. And now you want us to believe that you want to protect us?”

 

Lena clenches her jaw. “Officer…?”

 

“Officer McGill, of the Third Infantry,” he claims proudly.

 

Lena hums, running the name in her mind but coming up empty. She raises an eyebrow at him. “Where were you Officer McGill five years ago when Krypton attacked our border and the Archers had to fend off the attack by themselves resulting in the death of our Captain and promoting me,” Lena emphasizes, “Captain of the Archer’s Corp?” Lena lets the question hang for awhile as the Officer doesn’t respond. She hears the crowd murmurs all around. “If I remember correctly,” she continues. “Corben’s Infantry refused to hear our warning and left us on our own,” Lena says as the Officer retreats back to the crowd. She can’t let them doubt her commitment to protect the Kingdom and judge her or condemn her for the failure of her first Treaty with the Outlawed. “I’ve been defending the border my whole life. I’ve been defending this Kingdom over and over again. If you disregard this warning, we might as well hand over our Kingdom now,” she tells them fiercely, watching every one of them in the eyes.

 

The crowd grumbles and Lena clenches her jaw. She never wanted to lead but she knows she can nudge them toward peace.

 

“I drafted a peace and trade treaty with the Outlawed,” Lena continues. “I allied myself with Mars Republic,” J’onn steps forward and nods. “I am bound to the rightful heir of the House of El,” Lena says as Kara steps forward and stands next to her. “This is our chance to broaden our horizon. To see beyond. To live and not just survive!”

 

“We are tired…” a voice suddenly echoes and several follow, resounding in the Room. Dejected, cynical voices bouncing on the walls, touching everyone’s at the heart.

 

“I’m tired too,” Lena roars and watches them raises their head at the outburst. She finally has their full attention. “But I won’t give up. My father led us to war in fear. My brother bled us dry for greed and vengeance. But I’m asking you to fight with me for peace,” Lena says, asking them to believe in her, in hope, in something more. “We sacrificed everything, years after years protecting these walls. We built them with the blood of our blood, the flesh of our flesh,” she whispers fiercely as she meets Eli’s mother’s eyes suddenly. She gulps, breathless for one second. “The sacrifices we made will never be undone. The loved ones we lost will never be forgotten. But my father started a war he never got to finish. My brother continued a war he didn’t want to end. We can put an end to it. We can build peace together. If we fight one more time,” Lena says as she feels the warmth of Kara’s body against her side. “We rage,” Lena roars passionately and sees the crowd respond to her positively. “We never give up even in the face of impossible odds. We fight back even when we are down. We hope even in despair. _Do not go gentle into that good night!_ ” Lena clamors one last time, her father’s face in her mind, her mother’s, Lex’s, Eli’s. All those faces she couldn’t save replaced by those just in front of her, looking at her with hope.

 

“ _Rage_ ,” her archers tone.

 

“ _Rage_ ,” the Throne Room repeats as one. “ _Rage against the dying of the light_.”

 

***

 

“What are the odds we survive this?” Lena asks watching the stars above them. She managed to sneak away for the rest of the night, before she had to attend other meetings at dawn. Lena wants to make the most of it. Enjoy the peace while she still can.

 

“I don't know,” Kara shrugs, “but we had pretty good luck so far.”

 

Lena nods, breathing deeply. This is where she used to sneak away with Lex and run around at night. It feels weird and right at the same time. To be here. “Do you think there is something more out there?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

Lena points upward, head on Kara’s belly. “Beyond the stars. Do you think there are other worlds... other us?”

 

“Possibly,” Kara replies, caressing Lena’s hair. “Kryptonians believe that once bound two souls will always find each other through every repetition, in every life... That's why we don't take the treads away,” Kara admonishes her with a smile.

 

“I'm sorry about that,” Lena whispers, kissing Kara on the lips as an apology and settles next to her, head pressed against her lover’s cheek. “Do you think there is a world where I'm... maybe just a farm girl and you the beautiful lady coming to visit? Or a knight having to save the whole village...”

 

Kara laughs and Lena does too at the silliness of it.

 

“What would you like to do after this?” Lena whispers, feeling the strong heartbeat under her palm.

 

“Eat.”

 

Lena laughs and pokes her side.

 

“No, really!” Kara insists, still laughing. “There’s this amazing little tavern in the Outlawed that serves potstickers. Have you ever tried that before?”

 

Lena shakes her head. “I don’t even know what that is…”

 

“Then we’ll definitely have to go!” Kara says excited, tangling her fingers with hers.

 

Lena chuckles feeling excited too. “We’ll do that then,” she whispers caressing the ring on Kara’s finger. “What else?”

 

Kara hums and Lena leans closer wanting to feel the reverberation in her body. “I’ve never seen the oceans before…”

 

“Really?”

 

Kara nods. “You Luthorians have the monopole of the coast,” Kara reminds her teasingly.

 

Lena blinks. “I… There’s a cottage, near the ocean that belonged to my mother. It needs to be restored… and enlarged maybe… but we could…”

 

Kara stops her stammering with a kiss. “I’d love too.”

 

Lena nods delighted, feeling oddly peaceful and confident even with another war approaching. “So you'll find me?”

 

Kara nods cradling her jaw.

 

“In every other world?” Lena asks against soft lips.

 

“Yes, I’d reckon I’ll have to save you in every one of them.”

 

Lena laughs and rolls her eyes.

 

She used to think that the odds kept stacking against her, her whole life but if they had to in order to lead her to this; then Lena wouldn't change a thing. Lena will defy the odds, over and over again if only for the hope that she'll find Kara again somewhere along the way.

 

Kara kisses her and time stops. Lena thinks of stars, possibilities and hope.

 

She has finally found her something more.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so long!!! I know I left the story open ended but I really feel like their character's arc is finished. They will now fight for each other till the very end! You decide if they win the war or not... 
> 
> Personally, they do for me. I just like happy endings... They travel through the five Kingdoms and come back to that little cottage from time to time. Lena puts in place a Council and now she doesn't have to be a full-time Queen. Nor does Kara cause there's Kal and Krypton has always had a Council to rule the Kingdom... 
> 
> Anyway, that's it for this story. Thank you all so much for reading it! I hope you liked it!  
> Take care!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Tanthuo](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12466016) by [Story_ii_Character](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Story_ii_Character/pseuds/Story_ii_Character)




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